Worrying...

[Shannondances]

Most of the day I think of HPPD. I cannot get my mind of off it. It's completely bearable my visuals have actually gotten better. But this website is like an addiction for me. I get on here and will read things forever. I cannot look away. I hope my symptoms don't get worse but the fact that i worry about my symptoms makes me think of them and realize they're there again. Does anybody else have a problem forgetting about it? I'm just wondering if anyone has any suggestions to help me get my mind off of this stuff...

[rrab]

YES! I have this so bad every thing you said is how i feel. Had HPPD for 4 years now and i have learnt to live with it but it just never leaves my mind. I've been thinking about it more now that I'm trying my best to get rid of it. Im always looking at things thinking "is this better or worse then yesterday?" Now i've found this site to I'm on it every night looking threw all the old threads, just reading what its like for everyone els.

I know I need to stop thinking about it but fuck its hard. The best way I have found to forget about it is to keep my self occupied but still i struggle. I work by my self all day too so I have no one to talk too and my mind just runs all day long.

Sorry I can't help but best of luck

[Shannondances]

Wow I cOmpletely understand everything you said... Well best of luck to you I'm sure someday we will have something to be better

[Guest lisergic_way]

Im 22 and my psychotherapist told me that i have a little degree of OCD, but i dont need medication at all. It's more like a highly obsessive personality than a disorder itself, but it's still very tough, i become obsessed with EVERYTHING! im allways thinking in tragedy, that something is gonna happen to me in the street, i allways count my footsteps, im constantly afraid to die before i get to my goals, im highly perfectionist and allways try to keep simetry in my movements, etc etc. I've been taking LSD for 3 years, and i became obsessed with the idea of HPPD too, since i noted many of the simptoms. Anyway, i've learned to deal with aaall theese worries by accepting all of them as my imperfections and feeling GOOD about it, because i learned that once a thought gets inside of your head, its impossible to take away, and you have to learn to deal with it, and the most important, be HAPPY in spite of it. Your brain works only in possitive, i mean, if i tell you "Dont think in the apple....DONT...DONT THINK IN THE APPLE" you've probably seen an apple floating in front of you, or maybe in a tree that's the way the mind works, she doesn't understand the "NO" and believe me, now i live an absolutely normal and happy life (it was a hell just a few months ago) just by accepting and letting any kind of though flow inside my head, no matter how silly, horrible, stupid or perverse it might be, and feeling happy in spite of it. There is no formula, or magic healing thought; anything you think in order to "remedy" that worry is gonna make you fall in the same vicious circle, because like a said it's not about any thought itself, but the way you choose to feel about it. You get the real happiness when you accept those imperfections as a part of your life, because they are; and it's not any kind of "self-lying" act in order to "pretend i'm feeling better", it's a totally valid and natural adaptation process to the multiple facets of mind. And that's how you attack the conflict directly to the roots, by putting yourself against the wall and saying "YES i got this HPPD, and WHAT" or you can think "I got all this worries, im obsessed with this, AND WHAT!" or whatever you want to think, this way you remove all the power from this thoughts, and the mind has its own natural hability to past the page, and without even realize it, you won't be thinking in this stuff anymore. Actually, you WILL think those thougts again (because its impossibe get them off of your head remember?) but they will not have power on you at all, because you took them away all importance. When you try to "get your mind off of this stuff" you're blocking those thougths, and the mind see it as a threat, and will put all the available attention on it, you give them POWER on you, making impossible the fact of turning the page. See? it becomes a vicious circle. (By the way, curiously, the LSD and DMT (ayahuasca) helped me A LOT in this process of self acceptation and pacification). So, work on it, its a little bit confusing at the begining, remember accept all imperfections as part of you, putting you against the wall as many times as necesary (worries will come back many times, dont "worry" about it he he), and remember it's not the thoughts, but the way you let them affect you. I sincerely hope being helpful. Let me know if it worked

[lisergic_way]

Im 22 and my psychotherapist told me that i have a little degree of OCD, but i dont need medication at all. It's more like a highly obsessive personality than a disorder itself, but it's still very tough, i become obsessed with EVERYTHING! im allways thinking in tragedy, that something is gonna happen to me in the street, i allways count my footsteps, im constantly afraid to die before i get to my goals, im highly perfectionist and allways try to keep simetry in my movements, etc etc. I've been taking LSD for 3 years, and i became obsessed with the idea of HPPD too, since i noted many of the simptoms. Anyway, i've learned to deal with aaall theese worries by accepting all of them as my imperfections and feeling GOOD about it, because i learned that once a thought gets inside of your head, its impossible to remove it, and you have to learn to deal with it, and the most important, be HAPPY in spite of it. Your brain works only in possitive, i mean, if i tell you "Dont think in the apple....DONT...DONT THINK IN THE APPLE" you've probably seen an apple floating in front of you, or maybe in a tree that's the way the mind works, she doesn't understand the "NO" and believe me, now i live an absolutely normal and happy life (it was a hell just a few months ago) just by accepting and letting any kind of though flow inside my head, no matter how silly, horrible, stupid or perverse it might be, and feeling happy in spite of it. There is no formula, or magic healing thought; anything you think in order to "remedy" that worry is gonna make you fall in the same vicious circle, because like a said it's not about any thought itself, but the way you choose to feel about it. You get the real happiness when you accept those imperfections as a part of your life, because they are; and it's not any kind of "self-lying" act in order to "pretend i'm feeling better", it's a totally valid and natural adaptation process to the multiple facets of mind. And that's how you attack the conflict directly to the roots, by putting yourself against the wall and saying "YES i got this HPPD, and WHAT" or you can think "I got all this worries, im obsessed with this, AND WHAT!" or whatever you want to think, this way you remove all the power from this thoughts, and the mind has its own natural hability to past the page, and without even realize it, you won't be thinking in this stuff anymore. Actually, you WILL think those thougts again (because its impossibe get them off of your head remember?) but they will not have power on you at all, because you took them away all importance already. When you try to "get your mind off of this stuff" you're blocking those thougths, and the mind see it as a threat, and will put all the available attention on it, you give them POWER on you, making impossible the fact of turning the page. See? it becomes a vicious circle. (By the way, curiously, the LSD and DMT (ayahuasca) helped me A LOT in this process of self acceptation and pacification). So, work on it, its a little bit confusing at the begining, remember accept all imperfections as part of you, putting you against the wall as many times as necesary (worries will come back many times, dont "worry" about it he he), and remember it's not the thoughts, but the way you let them affect you. I sincerely hope being helpful. Let me know if it worked

[Year2]

Having had HPPD for 30+ years I think you're correct. The answer is to get involved with a positive obsessive pursuit. I'm an artist/musician and both are obsessive, though positive occupations. You could spend the rest of your life obsessing about specks flitting about on a wall. The choice is yours.

[Guest Thomas]

Having had HPPD for 30+ years I think you're correct. The answer is to get involved with a positive obsessive pursuit. I'm an artist/musician and both are obsessive, though positive occupations. You could spend the rest of your life obsessing about specks flitting about on a wall. The choice is yours.

quotes like that make me laugh out loud!! i'm a massive worrier, always been anxious, suffered depression, have a pretty bad drink/weed probem (i'm 28) and now (since may last year) i have good old Tinnitus to add to that beautiful concoction. not good. not good at all. and i'm a professional musician. ouch!! but comments like that somehow give me a bit of a spring in my step. it's a wonderful thing to know other people out there have been dealing with EXACTLY what you're going through, for fucking YEARS longer than you, and are still going about their lives, experiencing the world, making stuff happen. it's inspiring. thank you. thomas xxx