By Loukas iliop
Hello to the hppd family. After having hppd, a form of visual snow and some dpdr from weed ive been on my worst days of my life. I was panicing, having panic attacks, checking in every minute pf an hour and basically living in some sort of paranoia. 7 months later i started ignoring it and felt immediatelly better. Im now on my month 8 doing no fap, cold showers, no sugar diet, 4 liters of water a day and listening to positive affirmations daily. Evem though all those thing i still experience a lot of nightmares where i also have dpdr hppd etc. Yesterday i saw a very scary realistic dream with some sort of a demon into it. I woke up sweating and being in a lot of discomfort. I closed my eyes and saw the demon appearing and next to him that star or whatever its called just like afterimages (which im used to them trust me :p). They lasted for about 20 seconds amd they were very scary. I have never had tryied amy psychedelics, i have done mri tests and they are perfectly fine , ive given a schizophrenic test (although) i didnt have any symptom(because i was worried) and o had nothing. Before that day i was on day 12 of nofap, doing cold showers, had sugar free diet, being better with my mental state and working out. The only problem i had with my sleep is that i couldn't sleep well last year when i had none of those things ironically. Also, i sometimes experience sleep paralysis but not this time . im a little worried . can anyone relate to this?
Hello All, My name is Allen. I've browsed this site randomly over the past couple years but was afraid share. I'm in my 30's and have had HPPD 2 for 18 years. I was diagnosed 5 years ago after a seeing countless doctors through the years. Recently I found out my wife was pregnant and I became determined to find a treatment or, god willing, a cure. When I was in my mid teens I took lsd about 5 times and I was a chronic marijuana smoker. The last time I took lsd I smoked weed at the same time and I had the worst experience of my life: My heart began to race uncontrollably, my arms and face became numb; I saw long blury trails on everything and I felt hot and cold all at once. It was so intense that I thought for sure I was going to die. In desperation, I curled up in a ball on my couch, closed my eyes, and began to pray to god repeatedly to make it stop and let me live, until eventually I fell asleep. I woke up the next morning and thanked god I was alive. I swore of lsd forever. Unfortunately that didn't stop me from trying to party with my friends as usual. Every time I smoked weed after that I would have severe panic attacks and almost black out. When I'd drink alcohol I felt like I had a lump in my throat and couldn't breathe. A couple weeks after that horrible trip I woke up to a dull version of the same type of visuals I had the night of my bad trip, I was petrified and began having random panic attacks. I finally told my mother what I did and what happened since and she took me to the doctor. The doctor swore it was depression with anxiety and completely dismissed any lsd involvement. She prescribed me Effexor and xanax. The effexor didn't help at all and it made my heart race. The symptoms were not going away. I was afraid I damaged my brain beyond repair. Shortly after I withdrew from school and became a hermit. The xanax helped a lot with anxiety but the visuals remained. Through the years I saw about a dozen different psychiatrists and none of them knew what was wrong with me and continued me on benzodiazepines and ssri's. I lost my insurance and couldn't afford all the doctor appointments and medicine, so I began getting zoloft and Vicodin off the streets to self medicate. Eventually the visuals became less intense and my panic attacks were less frequent. Although the visuals and anxiety are a part of my daily life, I still manage to function. Some days are worse than others but I forced myself back into society and I got a good job in construction, and married my girlfriend who has been with me through this whole experience. I got off the vicodin with suboxone and continued the zoloft. With the news of our first child, I found a new determination to get rid of this horrible disease for good. I told my doctor that I wanted to try anything we can to make this stop and she agreed to start prescribing me different medications to see what, if anything, will work. She prescribed clonidine last visit and I started it 6 days ago. Unfortunately it hasn't helped my visuals at all and last night I began having strange thoughts and seeing weird images when I closed my eyes. I'll keep everyone updated on how it goes. I'm really hopeful that something will get rid of this for good. Wish me luck and good luck to all of you.
P.s. I am thankful to whomever started and maintains this site. I hope we can get this horrible disease more attention and find a real treatment for it.