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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum
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LethargicAcid

HPPD/DP.DR, could be related to "enmeshed" relationships

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so i go  to intensive group therapy now for mental illness we went over a paper. heres a paragraph:, 

 

                           ENMESHMENT / UNDEVELOPED SELF

    Excessive Emotional involvement and closeness with one or more significant others (often parents), at the expense of full individuation or normal social development. 

Often involves the belief that at least one of the enmeshed individuals cannot survive or be happy without the constant support of the other. May also include feelings of being smothered by, 

or fused with, others OR insufficient individual identity. Often experienced as a feeling of emptiness and floundering, having no direction, or in extreme cases questions one's existence.

 

It's a list of dysfunctional schemas / core values

 

 

So basically theres a loss of identity, and then the drugs used when aquired HPPD caused a existential crisis from a previous feeling the way that was listed above

Edited by LethargicAcid

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I'm not sure HPPD has a psychological origin, but i surely had this negative "enmeshment" with my mother. In fact, my worst moments of depersonalisation got triggered by her presence, words, letters, any form of contact or communication. I guess she completely abused me psychologically as a child. I actually don't see her anymore since 20 years, for that reason. Sad, but depersonalisation is a f.... horrible thing, so, that's all i can say. I never had depersonalisation since, only when i got letters, or stuff that made me think about it. At that time, it felt like my emotions where so overwhelming and contradictory (strong love/strong hate) that my mind was just shutting down. I can say drugs at that time were a way to discover myself and the world, but also an escape door.

Edited by olivier24445

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