Jump to content
Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum
Henkneedshelp

Hppd and some advice needed

Recommended Posts

Hi guys,

Im writing this after a week of research done about hppd on google. I couldn't find much about. But the reason i'm ending up here is because i need some advice.

So a bit more then a week ago i took ecstasy for the first time. I took 1/4 of a pill and 3 hours later i took 1/4 again. I didn't feel too much about the "high". It feelt good and dance all night. When i walked came out of the club (7am) my vision was bit blurry (probably because of being in a dark club all night). Then I went home and my parents were awake. Someone told me to look into light to hide dilated pupils so i did. 

Now the next morning i was scared i damaged my brain so i went online and searched the internet. At somepoint i stumbled across hppd. I immediately got scared i had this so i checked if i had any of the symptoms. 

Since i read about hppd i have the "visual snow" all the time, except for when I'm busy with other things. but for the last week I've been obsessing about the visual snow a lot.

I see a bit of a glare around lights but im not sure if i had that before. 

Some lights have a starshape

I have after images only when i look to bright lights for a few seconds and the after images dont last long.

That's about all the symptoms i have.  I don't seem to have walls morph into shapes or anything. I also don't have any of the depersonalition or derealization nor do i have depression. 

Now my real question do I have hppd? 

I have OCD so i had anxiety before i did the drug and because of OCD i tend to obsess about a lot of issues, health or other. 

Also i want to mention that I have done cannabis and alcohol before and since i have my symptoms i tried it once and it didn't seem to worsen the symptoms during the "high" of cannabis or alcohol. 

I might be overthinking this but some advice would be appreciated. 

Thank you,
Henkneedshelp

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello.  So, you only took MDMA that one time?  Do you have a history of taking psychedelics?  If that's the only time you dosed, then that's good news.  Some of your symptoms sound hppd like and some of them sound like normal visual imperfections  (star like shape when looking at lights). You may just be noticing the after effects of your chemical experience which should resolve fairly quickly.  I would stop taking psychoactive drugs including cannabis for a while, several months at least, six would be better.  After being clean for a while, see how you're doing.  Try to keep focused and don't spend lots of time examining each possible symptom.  Of course, the best way to avoid hppd or to keep it from getting worse is to avoid chemical entertainment altogether.

Please understand that I have no medical training and I'm not an expert on this disorder.  I'm just an old guy who's had it for a long time.

Take care.

Edited by MadDoc
Foolish typing
  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Considering you got the typical HPPD symptoms from only one session of MDMA, I'd say stick to cannabis and alcohol.

If I were you, I'd really take this as a warning sign.

Do not do like a lot of us, thinking : Oh it's fine, it will go away and I'll do MDMA again (or any other psychedelic/hallucinogenic drug for that matter, especially LSD).

You are starting do get HPPD symptoms after you used a drug which isn't really hallucinogenic itself, unlike LSD or shrooms. Imagine what would happen with LSD ?

Please do not take any other drugs apart from weed and alcohol. I'm really serious about it. Alcohol and weed are still very fun drugs. Stick only to them. Because once you get to HPPD level, I can GUARANTEE you that weed will totally suck. Crazy hallucinations (at least for me) and anxiety. You won't be able to binge on it like you used to.

So yeah, do what you want, I'm not your dad. If you want to take the drug again, I won't be able to stop you. Only your mind will be able to.

And as MadDoc said, quit everything for a while, let your brain get back to normal. Also, star shape lights (aka starbusting) is normal. It does get exacerbated with HPPD though.

And try distracting yourself as soon as you start thinking about visual snow. The more you think about it, the worse it gets.

Would be nice if you could keep us posted on this.

Take care.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey guys,

Thanks for answering.  

To MadDoc:

Yes its the only drug i have taken besides weed and alcohol. And only once. for weed and alcohol i only do that once or twice a week even before this. 

I used weed a few days ago to see what would happen as i read that it worsens it for a lot of people but for me it didnt make anhthing worse. Not even the morning after  (which gives me hope still gonna stay clean for a while.)

The only thing thats got me worrying more is that i got a bieping sound in my ear (tinnitus i think ita called) and it showed up randomly. and hasnt gone. I only here it when its really silent or when i focus on it. But during the times i want to sleep its quite annoying...

Also i dont really have a good sleeping ryhtme which might make recovery slower (atleast thats what i thought). So im gonna improve that and see if it gets better.

 

To dayum_son:

Dont worry i took this as a warning sign and decided right away to never do drugs again. Ill keep enjoying a good beer and joint once in a while but for now ill stay clean for a bit. 

Ill keep you updated once in while as well.

i wish you both the best as it seems you both got sever hppd.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the update ! I'm sorry to hear about your tinnitus, I hope that it will go away, and probably will.

Bad sleep cycle happens frequently after MDMA. 

MDMA depletes your serotonin levels. Serotonin is responsible for many things like appetite, mood and sleep.

So when your serotonin is a bit down, for some ppl it makes them have bad sleep cycles.

For some (like me), it makes them sleep like a small child ^^.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Similar Content

    • By andybob90
      Hi I am new to this forum and this is my first time posting. I believe I am a minor sufferer of HPPD. I have used several psychedelics a small number of times (LSD, 2cb, mdma) and a few months ago whilst taking mdma near the end of the high I smoked a joint to help me sleep and a few minutes after strong visuals onset and I had a strongly visual psychedelic experience akin to LSD lasting 4-6 hours. Ever since then I have had visual snow (more pronounced in very low light) and eye floaters when it is bright. I get closed eye visuals sometimes. I still smoke weed which makes the visuals worse but still much less prominent than the visuals on a full acid trip. When I sober up the visual snow goes back it's normal level. Since reading about HPPD the advice seems to be stopping taking all drugs but I really enjoy smoking weed as it brings me a lot of wellness and mental health benefits. I would like to continue to do so if possible. It has been 4 or 5 months since the HPPD started and my symptoms have not worsened. I am wondering if there is anyone that has this condition that still can smoke weed without Ill effect? Is it feasible that I could continue to do this?
    • By Floreal
      hi, I state that I've never used psychedelics, I'm here because I have a friend who says he has hppd after a bad trip, what are your symptoms? I also have After-images, objects that leave trails, visual snow (especially in poorly lit areas) if I look for more than 10 seconds one thing I see it moving and breathing (even the text I'm writing now, if I pay attention I can see it move) if I look at square surfaces I can see static lights that create geometric shapes (even as a child I could lol) if I notice I have a ton of floaters, with all this I want to say that these "bugs" we have them all, only that we ignore them because they are not important for our conscience. the friend who claims to have hppd to me seems more that has a kind of ptsd that is activated when you notice these visual "bugs", then I noticed that even if I focus so much on the visual snow for example I will start to notice it more until you can not ignore it until something does not distract my attention, if we obsess about a little thing the brain will end up growing it until it becomes a problem, I could even be wrong but this friend has solved quite a bit 'of visual problems simply ignoring them, when he saw them he looked away and did not think about it, in this way the brain has activated again that filter that serves to remove the visual noise, the important thing is to make the brain understand that that information is not important to you. sorry if I wrote badly but I used google translator, thanks for reading
    • By Tistik
      Hey everyone,
      I have had HPPD for like 3 months now, and I was just wanting to know if anyone knew what this was? I have discovered a black dot at the left side of my left eye. (The very far peripheral, i can't really make it out to well unless I blink) and I was wondering if this was related to HPPD? or if anyone has experienced this too? if i look forward and then blink a lot, I can see it gets bigger then fades away. I do overthink tremendously so i don't know if it is maybe just my eyelashes? or if i'm looking at the inside my eye and thinking its in my feild of view? or maybe its just the crease of my eye that i'm seeing?? anyway i'm quite scared because when i look it up i find sites for retinal detachment, and that scares me becasue i can only see out of one eye. if anyone could give me an answer to calm my nerves that would be great.
      thanks!
      PS. i'm going to the opticians soon to get it checked out. 
      PSS. I also have autism so i am hypersensitive. 
    • By Victor666
      Hello guys, it's been a year since i had the same problem as you. Always exactly 1 year I took 150ug of LSD and had a terrible bad trip that traumatized me and left me sequels. I had flashbacks and I missed a lot because of it. Distorted visions in my peripheral field. All this was cured with antipsychotics, especially risperidone (I can not remember the dosage). But what it took to be cured was the emotional sequel that caused me. Psychedelic experiences transform you radically and unfortunately if you are not prepared for them it may take a long time for you to get back on track and I confess that I am not yet 100% healed of this trauma. But what I can say to you is that the worst of all this is not the visions, but the horrible thoughts that go through our heads thanks to the anxiety that causes us. And what I want to know about this post is just that. What are the thoughts that torment you because of this anxiety? Write them in the comments and we'll help each other by talking about them. For example, I used to think all the time that I was getting schizophrenic, that there would be some outbreak, over time this evolved into existential crises where I thought my soul was lost in space time and I was not living reality, just watching it (depersonalization and derealization helped in this).
×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.