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rubbish

Hi from rubbish

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Hello all

I'm here because I'm struggling right now to get through each day.

I'm not quite sure if what I'm experiencing is HPPD - but I seem to have some of the symptoms people describe.

Visual snow, noticing floaters, and insane after-images. They last over a second. Even glancing at bright lights leave streaks in my vision.

I think some weed I smoked was laced with something - a week later, my vision started playing up and this was occurring.

It's been three months, and it hasn't gotten any better.

I'm meditating and trying to stay healthy. I smoke though, and drink coffee every day.

I don't know why I joined this forum - it seems this is likely something I will never recover from (just skimming the posts).

I guess I just want to chat.

I'm not sure if I can tolerate this life for the rest of it.

Sorry to bring the mood so down; it's just how I feel right now.

Cheers

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Loads of people recover, they just leave without saying anything... I'd say at least 70% recover. 3 months is not much time at all.

1 second after images are not too long, i have them for at least 5 seconds on certain objects, and if i look at a light for even a millisecond, i see an after image for at least 30 seconds. floaters are nothing abnormal at all, you are just noticing them because you are searching your vision. VS is often connected to hppd though. So it is possible you have some form of hppd.

Try removing caffeine, at least to test if it helps... Most hppd sufferers cannot tolerate it.

Try to keep calm and avoid stress.... Thinking that this is something you are now stuck with for life is not helping and is unlikely too... and even if you are one of the unlucky few, you will find coping mechanisms and will find a way to go on.

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So, this is from one incident where you think the weed might have been "enhanced"?  Give yourself some time because it's likely that your symptoms will subside.  However, it might not be a bad idea to take it up with a medical professional just to eliminate any other possible causes.  Granted, I didn't do that but my symptoms were clearly from psychedelic over exposure.

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Thanks for your replies. I appreciate your encouragement and recognise the unknown nature of my situation.

I forgot to mention that I have taken LSD on several occasions in the past - although, the last time I had taken it was weeks before the appearance of my symptoms.

I was also doing Poppers on the night I smoked the weed, which caused me Poppers maculopathy for a few months as well. I'm only just recovering from this now.

I guess the strange thing is that my symptoms only slowly appeared - not immediately after my drug consumption. I'm not sure if this is typical or not.

As for the afterimages, I believe they may similar to yours Jay1. Any bright light from a headlight or reflection will burn an image into my retina that lasts for some time - maybe not 30 seconds but at least 10. When looking at things I can see the lines and shadows of what was in my vision before. These can last for half a minute. I can see them now as I type.

How long have you had your symptoms, and how did they arise?

Thanks again for your encouraging words. They do help counter my pessimistic outlook.

 

Edited by rubbish
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My hppd came on slowly over time.  However, I noticed it after my first dose of acid.  I think if I had stopped then it would have gone away.  Instead I dosed almost continually for six years sometimes for weeks at a time.  That's how my symptoms came about.  I've had visuals for over 40 years.  You know what though?  Life has been wonderful.  I have few regrets.  The visuals I have are just part of me and I don't pay them a lot of attention.  What helped?  Getting focused and living my life. I was also lucky that some of my symptoms subsided and dissapeared over time.  Sorry about my babbling post but if there's one thing I want people to hear is that hppd isn't the end.  That being said, I don't want people to think hppd is no big deal and that dosing has no possible consequences.  I hope your symptoms subside. Hang in and take care.

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My symtoms had a slow rise from mild and enjoyable to full blown, though I did have one trip that seemed to break my mind a bit (22 years this weekend actualy... A purple microdot at Glastonbury 1995).

It is a bit hard to pinpoint when severe hppd took hold though, as I was doing drugs everyday for about 2 years prior and 1 year after that trip. I, naively, thought my symptoms were just part of the comedown or high and would go after a few weeks off the drugs.

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