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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum
bpl4269

holding a job with hppd

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Ever since i got hppd/dp/dr dragging my ass out of bed to go to my shitty minimum wage job has been the hardest thing for me. This being because when I go to work, I have to face the world, put on a facade, and endure physical and mental exertion for 8 hours straight. I dont ever want to talk to people, and when I do its usually forced. My boss and co workers treat me like shit too because they think im lazy because i do the bare minimum, but at this point im just trying to keep my head above water, to keep from totally losing it and punching someone square in the jaw. They know i have lyme disease as well so they must think im using it as an excuse to slack off. Before all this shit, i was the most outgoing, enthusiastic, hardworking person there. Now i just feel like a piece of shit on the bottom of my managers shoe. I dont know what it is but when any of them make some wiseass comment to me about how im slacking off, i get so angry and hurt because i know this isnt who i am and right now, im doing the best i can but apparently that isnt enough. Please help me, im feeling so depressed right now. My life is an absolute trainwreck with no meaning whatsoever. The worst thing about it though is the loss of my personality due to dp. I feel like im fucking dead inside.

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Can you change jobs to something that might be better for you and your hppd?

 

I'm lucky enough to be able to work from home and that has really, really changed my life, for the better.

 

But the first 6-7 years with hppd though, i had to do all sorts of jobs, while i got myself though uni...... factory work, pizza chef, bar work, waiting tables etc etc.... Of all of them, factory work best suited my state of mind... I could just graft without having to interact with the public.... and half the other workers were brain dead inbreds, so, even with heavy hppd... I was still one of the more upbeat and bright workers and quite often found myself getting promotions.

 

If you are not happy where you work, just change it.

 

Good luck.

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I just lost my job for having it. I'm not sure if that's illegal but some useful information would help a lot

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2 hours ago, Jesjar said:

I just lost my job for having it. I'm not sure if that's illegal but some useful information would help a lot

Could you tell more about your story?

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