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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum

jackk10

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  1. I get eye floaters only when looking outside or very bright rooms, though I do not associate my floaters with my HPPD/Visual Snow Syndrome because I’ve always had them. Quitting marijuana causes anxiety and many bizarre withdrawal symptoms. After 40 days that should have began diminishing dramatically. I’d say you’d have noticed these symptoms during the early stages of marijuana withdrawal and are looking for them more, which in turn is creating further anxiety and exaggerating common disturbances that have always been there. Floaters are fairly common, especially with age. Go get your eyes checked and triple check your eyes are in healthy order, I’m sure they’re fine. Once you have received this confirmation, move on and live your life. with your mind clearer than ever since since quitting marijuana, you’re essentially in a new reality to what you’ve grown accustomed to. Enjoy your new sobriety and embrace being clean, well done and keep it up. It is not uncommon for those who have quit marijuana to experience increase in anxiety. with regards to REM cycles ect - I don’t think that’s linked to HPPD, as HPPD is mostly visual. Vivid dreams are linked to withdrawal symptoms. I’d say your dreaming more vividly because you no longer have marijuana aiding your sleep. Id assume this would diminish if you made yourself tired during the day with exercise and a strict sleeping pattern. My VSS/HPPD worsens the more I read into it and freak myself out - so if I were you, I’d just move on and focus on your drug recovery. This post is purely my opinion and if you are worried, seek assistance from a professional rather than me, who is purely giving you advise based on my experience and knowledge.
  2. I also need to clarify that even though I’ve noticed all these symptoms at different times over the years, I’ve literally gone several months, if not years, of not noticing the symptoms at all. It’s so strange that all this would suddenly affect me so much out of the blue and be 10x worse than I’ve ever noticed, even worse than the weeks after the initial experience..
  3. I dont know whether I have visual snow or HPPD (just posted about it) so I don’t take medication. I would personally work on the mental component of your symptoms, which is working on accepting and allowing it to become something that runs in the background of your mind. Relaxation therapy, exercise and talking through your reactions/feelings towards your symptoms will help massively, I promise.
  4. What a stressful time! Youre stressed and your brain is tired, you need a break. Try to focus on the positives in your life and accept that you can’t control everything. You sound alot like me on a bad day! Everything is going to be alright, you’re going to be fine. I know you need reassurance but reassurance feeds your anxiety, try some relaxation therapy.
  5. Hi everyone, Man, this is a long story. I’m currently 27 years old for reference. This is something I’ve never tackled head on, I’ve always just repressed and shrugged off. I hope you guys can help me with some insight and clarification. It will help me come to terms with what is going on. I promise I’m not a hypochondriac looking for reassurance, I’m purely looking for certainty with my condition. I’ll start off by touching on the fact that I have never been a full on drug user, rather just a teenager experimenting and partying with my friends. I would take the occasional pill and smoke some weed every so often at parties, which was always fun and no problems. One day when I was 16, I took a half pill (it barely worked) so then smoked a bunch of weed with my friends. 15 minutes later I was tripping balls, everything was shimmering, voices were echoing, I was hearing random sounds, seeing Pac-Mans on tiles, seeing faces in patterns, intense closed eye visuals when trying to sleep it off ect - it was horrible and put me off weed completely. The following days I had severe depersonalisation and panic attacks, I’ll never forget those horrible emotions I felt the days after, it was a nightmare. Weeks after, the anxiety diminished, however I noticed that I could look at objects and look away and the image would persist in about 70% detail and same colour - aka Palinopsia. I never really noticed this before, it was completely new to me, though I was consciously looking for visual symptoms at the time. I also had my first migraine with aura around this time, which I’ve had once a year ever since. I noticed I could see faces in patterns (I think this is normal though) and halos around lights, but it wasn’t that bad. For a while I was obsessed with playing with my Palinopsia and at the time, google didn’t bring up much, so I literally did not care what’s so ever about it in the end, it didn’t bother me, and I only noticed it when I wanted to notice it 6 months after that horrible experience, I smoked some weed again (much less than I previously would) and started tripping mildly, nowhere near the same before, however it made me realise I could never smoke weed again and get the same high as previously, it was like my brain completely did a 180 on weed and reacted differently. I made the decision to never touch marijuana again, or even be in the same room as someone smoking. The palinopsia continued in the background and life went on normal, where sometimes I’d randomly notice the after images I’d shrug it off. 11 years later, aka these days, ive lived a very normal drug free life, with the exception of getting drunk with mates. I’ve definitely noticed strange things in my vision over time: example; sometimes when I fall asleep, I get intense imagery and sounds in my head, this begins right as I fall asleep - it’s very similar to the CEVS experienced from the night mentioned above. example 2: I get static in the evenings and dimly lit rooms, blue field entoptic phenomenon, mild photophobia. + ongoing Palinopsia. I never knew at the time what these symptoms actually were, so again I shrugged them off example 3: negative after images and a bizarre phenomenon where if I look at a bright yellow wall, it becomes a giant blob/after image within itself until I blink? all these symptoms have been there for 11 years, maybe they’ve always been there but I never noticed them previously, only after my bad drug experience. Now, the reason I am here and some questions I have for you guys. all these symptoms have just become 10x worse for no reason (or maybe you can clarify this for me?) 3 months ago I thought I had Methonal poisoning whilst in Bali (I didn’t) however I read that going blind is a major sign you’ve been laced with methonal. I began to obsessively watch my vision for signs of going blind (this is likely due to my mild OCD) and this sent me into a horrible spiral of obsessively watching my vision. I ended up getting severe migraines from stress and very bad panic attacks. I started to come good for a while until recently. 3 months ago I was driving along and realised I was looking at things and looking away to see if after images would persist subconsciously, and I had a massive panic attack and suddenly remembered that night when I took that pill and smoked weed. When I got home, I googled my symptoms - it lead me to visual snow and HPPD - something I had never heard of. Since learning about both disorders, I’ve become obsessed with checking for ALL the symptoms, which now my Palinopsoa is INTENSE and A LOT more vivid then ever, I can look at someone’s face and see it again when looking at a wall (they last less than a second, like a flash). I find myself looking for static and seeing it more, I get floaters more than ever and my anxiety levels are through the roof. all my symptoms mentioned above have become so much worse, which lead me to get numerous eye test, MRI, and seeing a renowned neurologist who leads research for Visual Snow in Australia. Everything in my brain and eyes are structurally perfect, no lessions or underlying medical issues. He diagnosed me with visual snow syndrome, despite me telling him about that horrible experience with drugs! He said that he highly doubts that it would be HPPD because it was such a low dose of XTC and marijuana “rarely causes it”. A big part of me thinks it’s HPPD, because I noticed all this ever since that night, but then again, maybe it’s always been there!? I hope you guys can give me advise based on your knowledge and experience and tell me whether my symptoms could be HPPD or not? I honestly believe you guys would know more than my neurologist, as you likely are more knowledgeable about HPPD, whereas he knows more about visual snow. 1. Based on the above, could I have HPPD or Visual Snow? 2. Is it possible for HPPD to last 11 years considering I’ve never taken LSD? 3. Can the symptoms of HPPD/Visual snow get worse the more I obsess over it? 4. If I did have HPPD, is it possible it has returned 11 years later much worse? Or is it the health anxiety about the problem making it appear worse? I’ve not touched drugs to trigger anything/make it worse. 5. are my symptoms consistent with yours? I think it’s worth noting I do not get warping walls or see strange colours swirls, it’s purely palinopsia that is most prominent and mild static. I feel like all my other visual disturbances are common in people I really appreciate it if you’ve made it this far. I just want to know your thoughts, as I am on the fence whether it’s HPPD or Visual Snow. Jack
  6. Your symptoms are not getting worse, your anxiety levels are higher thus making already experienced phenomenon appear worse. Try to relax.
  7. I know exactly what you are talking about. I used to get this as a child when I was sick. I’ve had it happen to be a few times as an adult, where I’ll dream of something completely unimaginable and unexplainable, it’s terrifying and I can’t explain the level of fear and emotion. I can barely remember the imagery either, I can recall the feeling and emotion which again, is hard to explain. Sometimes during the day I’ll get a déjà vu feeling and “remember” the imagery but it fades away before I can actually cling onto the memory. I really can’t explain it, but I know what you’re talking about. I also doubt it’s drug related, as this happened to me as a child. It’s interesting that I stumbled across this because I was actually researching visual snow/HPPD and see this at the top when entering the forum! wasn't expecting that, as I’ve never known what to google when trying to figure out what it was, glad I’m not alone.
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