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Blossy

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Everything posted by Blossy

  1. Central Scotland here, where we are terrified of the men who terrify men and sheep.
  2. Blossy

    Drug types?

    Strawberries, takes me back - Purple Oms (sp) wee the little blighters that really 'gave' me this crazy condition we all have - that and another 15 years of indulgence afterwards, but Purple Oms, they were the little sheets of paper that changed my life forever after 1 absolutely mind bending flash-back a week after another mind-bending trip that I was ( at the age of 15 ) NOT prepared for!!
  3. Blossy

    Drug types?

    As above, 1 'tab', half a 'tab', of Acid - 1 E, 2 E's etc - usually purchased in darkness in a car park prior to a rave event or in a toilet of the same or in later years in a pub or dodgy house party ( when E went our of fashion and it was coke we were all blasting heavily ) - and often halfed with friend, almost always actually! A shame those amazing nights have had such lasting ripples, as they were amazing, would I change it, not sure, parts for sure, but man, some of the memories are good and only can be related to 'if you were there'!
  4. Palinopsia is one of my symptoms that organically improved - for me time was the greatest 'healer' of this. I mean, if I still 'look' for it and stare and then look away its there , but as a thing its definitely improved for me. Relax, stay away from booze and caffeine and drugs the best advice I can ever give after 30+ years of this.
  5. Soz, not been on for a while - and Kaleidoscope, out stories are very much the same - Jay, funny you mention pinching yourslelf, my latest 'thing' is popping my ears and giving myself a pinch on the cheek when im feeling really floaty as you say - these little things defo get us through this thing we live with!
  6. Stress is defo my worst enemy, I had a major flare-up in July last year ( funnily enough tho, it was after a heavy drinking session on red wine and Port and I had a case of the DT's and had a major panic attack ) and only now am I really feeling like 'myself' again and back to some kind of 'baseline'. The DPRD is and Anxiety the absolute killer for me, but thankfully now as good as they will ever be, barring some miracle or majic pill. And I took enough 'magic pills' in my time to know that generally they are bad. Relax, eat well, sleep well, live well, think well.
  7. Just searched the topic for Valerian Root and found this thread! In an attempt to naturally help with my anxiety I bought some "Kalms Day' and so far they do seem to be having a 'Kalming' effect on me. They seem to be completely natural too so combining this with the Vitamin B and living a generally well ( well, mostly.... ) good living i'm hoping to keep taking steps forward as far as my anxiety and Derealisation goes. Also, I've been feasting on Pineapple recently, that also makes me feel good - weird I knowI
  8. Im 45 now, and my HPPD started 30 years ago, i've not done E or LSD for 24 years at least, nearer 25 for sure. The Sky is so bright here I honestly see nothing bar the sun burning my retinas when I look at it! My snow varies, at night it's the worst, during bright days there can be days I do not even notice it. As noted above, mindset my friend, try to look past it and focus on the content of the life in front of you, not the quality of the picture.
  9. I honestly think i've had it my whole life, but it was really brought to the fore-front of my sight due to too many years of bad living though the Extacy and LSD years. If I focus on it, I see it more, if I don't, I see it less. Generally!
  10. I had a bad time around 6 months ago, and my visual snow is the one symptom that seems to have increased too without going back to 'base levels'. At night seeing objects close to me is just a fuzzy and 'noised' mess, however, day comes and things are bright and the snow is there but I look beyond it, and as per all the symptoms we all feel in varying degrees not focusing on it is one of the best treatments. Mindset is our greatest ally in my opinion. Until there is a magic pill to make this go away anyway. Being sober is a good idea, I had a rough night on the booze a few months ago and woke up in the night for tne bathroom and my snow was so bad through the pending hangover it was like waking through a swarm of bees - that was the night that I thought too much booze definitely can affect this so going sober for a while may be a good idea. Im generally a 'social grazer' on alcohol, rarely drink 'too much'. For ref, i'm positive i've had VS all my life, as i've mentioned on here before when I was a kid I used to think, and say, I could "see the Air", which I now know, and although it is definitely MASSIVELY exaggerated since my hallucinogenic days, i've always had. Focus on what's beyond the snow, I consider it as interference only, like watching a low-res movie online, and a standard def TV show - the content is still there, just not as sharp as you would like it to be. x
  11. Haha, not weirdness at all, and indulgence is good, as long as its in the right things!
  12. Keep us posted Lucas, I am not one that likes to put too much in my body drugs wise, even the Vitamins I take id rather not so very keen to hear how the TMS goes.....VERY expensive here in the UK however!!
  13. It is comforting to Read these intro's and experiences, and as Jay noted above, and we share similar 'stories. Your experiences and also symptoms share many, many parallels with mine - I am also mid 40's, 45 ( 47 is mid right??? ) and have had lived and accepted this condition for a very long time. As MadDoc and you have noted above, I also am convinced taking so many and so many powerful hallucinogenics at such a young age was the trigger on this for me. Man, finding you guys on here has been the best thing for so many people in this HPPD journey, for me for sure. x
  14. As above - stay strong all, stay healthy, keep looking forward! x
  15. Hahhaha, good times my friend!!!
  16. Sorry, advice, for me the best advice is to try and manage your anxiety. You are definitely not alone.
  17. You know, in late 1996 I was taking alot of E/MDMA, and I swear, when I was massively out of it is when I felt the greatest release from my HPPD, by that time ( I was 20 ) I knew that mentally something had really gone wrong in my head, and the E/MDMA really did give me massive, and almost complete relief - but only when I was fully under the influence of the pills. Man, the human brain, what a piece of engineering.
  18. Haha, well, we had a saying back in those days called the "Skid", and "Skidding" was effectively coming down, all that 'sparkly' and spaced our way and often we would talk about sometimes 'it' not wearing off till maybe a Tuesday and then we would start to look forward to the coming weekend and it would all start again - 2 days with not sleep and a Sunday climbing the walls or drinking heavily or taking lots of 'Jellies' and Valium to get to sleep! ! As we got older we used to talk about the "Perma-skid" which was a feeling some of us felt that the drugs never actually wore off, and now in my mature years I look back and think, was this a mild HPPD that the guys were experiencing, and is this "Perma-skid" real and what we now know as HPPD! I know how severe mine has been ( and as ive mentioned before teh night and subsequent flash-back that triggered it ) and the challenges it has given me in life, but after being on this forum it does seem as if there are varying levels of how this condition affects us and makes me think, do more of the lads ( many of whom I am still good friends with and socialise with to this day ) dealing with the same...... At one point Jay we used to call ourselves "The Brotherhood of Waste", I do think our groups would have got on well back in those days! Haha! x
  19. Alot of talk about HPPD is pinned down on LSD, but let's face it, some of the trips I had of E's were every bit as heavy as tabs or dots, especially mid 90's when the quality of the pills really started to decline.
  20. Agreed Jay, I do remember in the early 90's alot of talk about the new drug that kids were taking ( E ) and the potential long term effects of it, I guess HPPD is one of them, and I wonder, is it more common than we know as literally ALL my friends were immersed in the scene back in the day.
  21. Yes, I to this day get the visuals of random and intermittent, and quite rare to be fair, a droplet falling from ceilings.
  22. Digressing there form the thread title, my general advice to anyone, stop the hallucinogenics and smoking dope, eat well, sleep well, have a busy brain - immerse yourself in good things. Manage your anxiety as best as poss.
  23. You know, I recent months love been thinking about how much the Extacy tablets ( MDMA ) also added to this thing of mine/ours. Many, many years beyond "that night" when I was 16 when the LSD opened a door i've been struggling to close since, I took lots of crazy hallucinogenic tablets after the initial euphoric E's started to disappear and they got all 'smacky' and heavy on the visuals - sometimes I do wonder how much that contributed to this. I actually handled those days and nights well as I was in my very late teens and early 20's and was enjoying the 'rave generation' I guess, and sometimes I put down my age and inexperience of these drugs back at the start down to the HPPD ever starting! It's funny too, my major anxiety I suffer is of 'that night' that I had the worst time i've ever had on this planet, and the worry of it happening again - literally my life ( connection to reality! ) feels like its on a knife edge, and i'm working hard to tell myself its not, and manage the anxiety - in general thanks to this forum! But I never or rarely ever think about other mind-bending nights i've had on LSD and E's, which in all honestly and at the time, were some of the best times covered in good music and lifelong friends!!! Who knows, the answer will never be clear but I really do think the water ( for me anyway ) is a bit muddier that simply being one night giving me this condition I live with every minute of every day. One night definitely changed me, but maybe a decade of misuse after that really made me...... We shall solder on, and for ref, if I could go back in time I would never, ever touch any of these things back in the 90's and 00's we used to call 'recreational'. x
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