sami

@David S. Kozin I can help out with the web development.

Pattern glare, palinopsia and tinnitus.

Sounds like you had a panic attack, not uncommon with edibles. Regarding visuals, hard to say if you are just paying extra attention to things because of the panic attack. Some people get hallucinations from weed, especially if they've done hallucinogens previously.

I've had PTSD since childhood and it sounds exactly like it's what you are going through.

Yea, definitely obsessing about it, constantly looking for changes, stress, anxiety makes it worse. I think mine has gotten better by just forcing myself to do other things, even when it is at its worst. I basically also have OCD so fighting those tendencies at the same time is really difficult.

I haven't noticed it previously, but I've also been on a bunch of herbs for lyme disease for a month now, so I'm suspecting it might have something to do with it. This is the first time ever I've actually noticed a relief from anything at all with my visuals since everything started 1.5 yrs ago.

I've only used Zopiclone, but I notice a big change the next day when I've taken it for the night with reduction of visuals and tinnitus. So my question is, those of you who have used benzos and stopped using them, or use them in periods, do you get an increase in symptoms when you taper them off before returning to baseline?

Rebound from Zopiclone definitely makes it worse. Going cold turkey was what made mine explode in intensity. I was off Zopiclone completely for almost five months. Some of my symptoms improved during that time (photophobia, textual bombardment, palinopsia) but others kept on getting worse (visual snow, pattern glare, floaters, tinnitus). A month ago I got major sleeping issues again and decided I would risk Zopiclone use again, me being without sleep just makes my life worse, depression, anxiety, etc. Once I started I quite quickly noticed a further improvement in visuals, especially pattern glare, palinopsia and tinnitus. I even had a case of photophobia coming back before that, and it's completely gone now. Though, since there is the dependency issue, I am trying to get off it again by really slowly tapering it off. Been down to 1 mg per night past week and my visuals were really bad yesterday. By tapering it down anxiety is not that bad. Got a minor panic attack before bedtime yesterday and took a full pill again, and today my visuals and tinnitus have improved a lot again. So, Zopiclone really helps with my visuals and tinnitus but rebound is hell, and makes it a lot worse. Slowly tapering it down is the only choice but even then it gets worse. But I'm in doubt saying that Zopiclone makes it permanently worse. I believe I have other causes that keeps on making my HPPD worse, which is infection, so Zopiclone does when used give me some relief. I would prefer though not have to use it at all but I keep it for emergencies.

I use Mirtazapine currently just for sleep. For it to work properly then you have to take a very low dose. Then it helps with sleep and doesn't really have any affect on depression. I take about 2.5-3 mg a few hours before bedtime. Have to brake the pill into smaller parts. I've been on Mirtazapine for several years. Was when I developed HPPD and quit it for four months just to rule it did not make things worse. Quitting it had no effect on my HPPD so I'm not especially worried now it would affect it somehow at these small amounts. Sleep is extremely important to deal with all the symptoms, so I think it's worth it right now.

There could be something else, possible infection, that makes it worse. I'm in the same boat. Abstaining from drugs, living healthy, hasn't helped me. Lyme, mold, etc. could be the reason your hppd gets worse. After a while though I've gotten quite used to it. Still depressed about it but life goes on. DP/DR is a lot better once I got my anxiety in check. I'm treating my hppd now as it is a result of lyme infection and drugs, since I have a lot of other symptoms than just the hppd ones (joint pain, random pain, digestive issues, other neurological issues not covered by hppd).

True. I don't know what the requirements are for running the forum but it sounds like an Azure or AWS shared environment that is rather traffic based than user based might be a cheaper solution. Maybe privacy is the issue then. What about a dedicated virtual server? Then you'd have full control. There are a lot of cheap options out there. I've used Lunanode in Canada for my Bitcoin projects, supereasy to have up and running, stable and cheap, Linux based.

@Jay1 What kind of traffic are we talking about? Sounds very expensive.

Me 2

Maybe you temporarily need some sort of benzodiazepines that'd help you to deal with the anxiety. I can also recommend, once again, temporarily, something like Zopiclone for sleep. Do you have a doctor you can talk to about your issues? You don't have to bring the HPPD up if it doesn't feel comfortable. Also, finding a therapist to talk to should help. I have two myself.

Here is a short thread on alcohol:

Most often alcohol has not made my visual symtpoms worse. I've gotten completely wasted a few times, but try to limit it anyway. Last week I had a glass of red wine and it seemed to make my symptoms worse, but that's the only time it has happened, so it could have been something else. Tried a glass yesterday and it had no effect. It might have to do with how alcohol affects the glutamate and GABA receptors in brain. Alcohol actually lowers glutamate and increases GABA which is supposedly exactly what people with HPPD need. But there are those that do get worse symptoms so be careful.

I've been completely off Zopiclone past two months looking for my baseline. And back then I took two pills two nights while having problems sleeping. Before that it was beginning of February last time. So basically all of my meds past three months except for those two nights, and now yesterday then. So yeah, super careful. Been on too many meds in my life - have no idea how much they've messed up my brain and maybe made me more predisposable for HPPD.

I've had trouble sleeping but not anymore. Now I took it to calm me down for it makes wonders with my anxiety, better than benzodiazepine, plus I have a prescription. But I am super careful. Don't want to get dependent on it which did happen last year. Getting off them is what made my HPPD 100x worse in just 4-5 days.

We talk a lot about how different meds affect HPPD but I am starting to wonder if it has more to do with how different medications affect our anxiety and stress levels, and it is in turn that what actually worsens HPPD.

It's a bumpy ride. My dp/dr got worse two days ago for the first time in eight weeks. And I am convinced it's related to me having more anxiety because of stress (was supposed to do a trip but cancelled it) and noticing slightly more visual snow. So back to relaxing. I actually took Zopiclone before bed yesterday and I definitely noticed less vs after that - but it could be the case of me just not having as much anxiety. Anxiety and HPPD is a really bad combo.

Yeah, gone through the same thing recently: realizing I probably started developing symptoms from my first DOB trip back in 2016, but I was doing so much drugs back then, partying, dealing with anxiety and depression, being on meds and smoking weed that I just ignored anything weird going on as some sort of afterglow. Then when I went cold turkey with Zopiclone in December last year, my anxiety went up the roof and my symptoms exploded. So there are similarities. Getting hppd from drugs, then have it made worse by pharmaceuticals.

@HalluciSofos How's it going?

Got no experience of DMT but melatonin seems to make my HPPD worse. I get kaleidoscope like CEVs when rubbing my eyes. Starts with my Visual Snow going crazy, and then kaleidoscope/vortex like triangles. My 2 cents.

I wouldn't be surprised if there is a strong correlation between VSS and HPPD, considering the similarities of the conditions. Not everyone with VSS do have all the other symptoms associated with VSS and not everyone with HPPD have all the symptoms associated with HPPD. I am speculating of course but considering the similarities, I get the feeling that the sort of neurological damage among (some at least) people with HPPD has gotten from drugs is something others are born with or develop later in life because of other conditions. Many people with VSS say they've gotten it from stress, anxiety, panic attacks, etc. and I've also seen speculation that HPPD might be associated with PTSD, and therefore there could be a correlation there. My symptoms check of both VSS and HPPD symptom lists, but I am today convinced I do have HPPD after remembering some minor cases of "flashbacks" and hallucinations before developing VS, palinopsia, ghosting, halos, tinnitus, dp/dr, etc.

Update: Had a glas of red wine today. My symptoms got worse this time. Guess skipping alcohol completely is the way to go ahead.