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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum

billy

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billy last won the day on December 27 2018

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  1. billy

    My HPPD is gone!

    I didn't take anything except the supplements I listed. I tried to get a prescription at one point for anti anxiety medication, but the doctor I saw was not open to it. Now that my symptoms have gone away without medication, I'm happy i didn't take anything.
  2. billy

    My HPPD is gone!

    About a half a year ago, after a trip, I started having symptoms of HPPD. I had visual snow, and huge starbursts at night. I saw lots of BFEP, I had an intense amount of floaters in my vision, and I could hardly look at any light, or tv screen, or (god forbid) projected PowerPoint presentation without getting horrible afterimages. I had bad denationalization, and I constantly had the feeling that I was living in a dream world, and was having constant panic attacks. After two months most of the denationalization had faded away, but I still had the afterimages, and floaters, and other visual symptoms. After another month, I noticed that I could look at lights, and the afterimages would fade much more quickly. I also noticed that the floaters were only visible in bright light, they were previously visible in even a dimly lit room. Another month later and I could hardly see the floaters anymore. I barely got afterimages, and could drive in the dark without getting bothered. I could look at screens, and don't see swimming dots. I hardly see floaters anymore, unless I look at a white wall or blank sky. I didn't do much specifically to aid in my recovery. I tried out some supplements recommended on this board (lions mane, ginkgo, b vitamins, fish oil). I didn't notice any difference until months after I started taking them, and have since stopped, and not noticed any symptoms returning. I don't think they helped me with my recovery, but I can't be sure, because I was taking them at that time. During the entire time since I got HPPD I have not done any illicit substances at all. I have drunk alcohol however, and have had many weekend nights when I was drunk. This had a negative effect, at the beginning, but after I got over the denationalization, I didn't notice any increase in negative effects from drinking I think that it was mostly time that helped me get cured. It took about 4 months from the time my symptoms started till I could say I felt normal again. I count myself extremely lucky that things improved as quickly as they did I have been away from this website for a while. After the first three months I was able to handle my life without using this website. I would not have come back, except that I wanted to post about my good news. When I first started reading this site, I was scared, and reading positive results like this made me feel less terrified. For those of you who are like me a half year ago, it's been a few weeks and you're still seeing thing, just know that some people do recover.
  3. billy

    Lions mane

    I would recommend Ginko Biloba supplements though. I noticed an immediate (small) decrease in symptoms when I started taking those.
  4. billy

    Lions mane

    I have been taking lions mane supplement for the last month and a half. During that time I have seen some small improvement in how much visual snow I see, maybe 30% reduction. I am not sure how much of this is attributable to the lions mane, or due to other supplements I'm taking or just to the passing of time. I saw no immediate improvement when I started taking the supplement. I think it might be mostly placebo. I can't say if there is any effect from stopping taking the supplement, because I'm still using it.
  5. billy

    Sick but afraid to take medicine

    I had a cold hast week and I was popping about 6 ibuprofen a day, and it didn't have any worsening effect that I could see.
  6. Before I had HPPD I used to have a ton of things I looked forward to. Vacations, hanging out with friends, going out on the weekends, hiking, seeing my family. Now I am to worried to look forward to anything. I have a hard enough time getting through the day. If I do things out of my normal routine it often results in my symptoms getting worse, and having a panic attack. It feels like there's nothing left to look forward to, except a lifetime of trying to alleviate my symptoms. What do you guys look forward to? Were you guys eventually able to do the things you used to love?
  7. @jbalsa2 thanks for saying so. It's nice to have people who have some understanding of my situation. I am so scared that my life is ruined, and that I'm going to ruin the lives of my family as well. It especially kills me seeing my parents trying to help me, and not being able to tell them the truth cause I know it will only hurt them more. My dad just recovered from surgery, the last thing he needs to hear is his child is a fuckup. I am going to talk to a psychiatrist soon, hopefully they will be able to prescribe me something that might help.
  8. @jbalsa2 Thanks for the advice, It makes me hopeful. I was wondering how you were able to find a doctor to prescribe this sort of thing. I feel since it is off label most doctors would be against it.
  9. @jbalsa2 I've been dealing with the symptoms for almost two months. DPDR is definitely my worst symptom by far. I also have a pretty extreme amount of floaters, and some mild visual snow. I have periods when I feel normal, (especially when its dark and I can hardly notice the visual stuff), but when It's bright and I see the floaters floating around each time I move my eyes, and the glimmering of the VS on the sky I lose myself. I've become like reclusive only staying inside cause I can't handle lights. This is what people usually notice.
  10. Hi guys, I'm struggling really bad with this shit. I can't deal with being outside when it's bright out, and anytime i move my eyes I feel like shit is moving in my vision. It's really affecting me and people are starting to notice I'm different. My parents especially notice that something is up. They can tell I'm avoiding things and that I'm scared. I told them It's just anxiety, and they keep expecting it to just go away. I keep thinking I should tell them what is really going on. I think they would be supportive, if a little angry, but I'm afraid that it would destroy them to think that I might be like this permanently. I can just imagine them crying as soon as I leave, and I don't want them to suffer for my sake. I just don't know what to do or who to talk to. I am talking to the counselor at my college, but all she keeps telling me is to do these deep breathing exercise which will only calm me down until I open my eyes again and start seeing things all wrong. Have you guys told parents/ other people/found someone to confide in?
  11. billy

    Blank Stare

    I feel like this a lot. I feel like I have the look of fear, and indifference on my face at all times. It reminds me of the Pink Floyd lyric about their original guitarist Syd Barrett, who suffered from mental illness most assume was from acid, "Now there's a look in your eyes, like black holes in the sky" 600 × 450
  12. billy

    Is this HPPD?

    Thank you for your reply I very much hope you are right. It's just hard to dismiss because I see the floaters all the time now, and the onset was the day after I tripped, so it's almost certain that something happened.
  13. This guy on reddit said it cured his, he only had it for 3 weeks though. Dare to hope lol.
  14. billy

    Is this HPPD?

    Hello All, I did 2 tabs LSD a little over a month ago. Ever since then I haven't felt right. The first thing I noticed were floaters, I had like 20 that I could see. I thought that the LSD had caused a retinal detachment, and a week after the trip went to an optometrist who told me I do have a few floaters, but nothing serious. I've noticed them before but never as crazily as this. I also noticed a sensitivity to light, like if I looked at the tv right it would make me very uncomfortable. Since then I searched the Internet for floaters related to LSD and ended up learning all about about HPPD, and the other symptoms. I can't tell if I have the symptoms or not because they are so variable. Sometimes I am sure I have visual snow, other times I can't see any. I have moments when I feel depersonalized, and moments when I don't. sometimes lines look wavy and other times they're 100% straight. I feel like I might see starbursts on lights at night, but I didn't notice that until I read about it and looked for it, so idk if it's really any different than normal. The only symptoms that are 100% there all the time is the floaters, and light sensitivity. They are so noticeable when move my eyes, and make me very uncomfortable. Also staring at a projector screen or the sky is really uncomfortable. Do you guys think this is HPPD?
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