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therocknamedwonder

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Posts posted by therocknamedwonder

  1. 26 minutes ago, MadDoc said:

    I've been through a number of procedures where they put me under.  I've never had any opiate medication afterwards.  My symptoms never seemed any worse during recovery or in the long haul. 

    Wow, thank you so much! That's very helpful. I really appreciate that, that makes me feel better. Thanks MadDoc! ((:

  2. On 2/6/2019 at 8:19 PM, Tn99 said:

    I’d try and stay away from nitrous oxide which dentists sometimes use. 

    I did 24 nos balloons after smoking 3 joints and it made my hppd worse than when it first started but only for about a week then it returned to being manageable. 

    I’ve only being experiencing symptoms for about 5 weeks and about 2 weeks in i was already taking ecstasy, ketamine and nitrous and I’ve been smoking weed every day other than a 5 day break when I first noticed visual symptoms. 

    Anyway if you do experience worse symptoms after the procedure just pop some valiums and I’m sure you’ll be fine 

    Are you sure your symptoms couldn't have been enhanced by the joints? And doing 24 whippets? Because that sounds like a lot of extra stuff that I don't plan on doing. Weed is what triggered my HPPD to go into full blown hppd, so I'm not going to touch it until at least two years after my symptoms go away.

    I really hope you're doing okay, that's a whole lot of drugs in a very short span of time. I used to be a moderate user of quite a few things, so I can't really scorn you. But my personal recommendation would be to stop doing drugs (especially ecstact, K, and weed, which have all been known to cause & worsen hppd) while you're ahead if you're already having some symptoms. Sounds like you're really rolling the dice my friend. I hope you're doin ok! Thank you for your input ((: 

  3. I've read on countless posts that exercise has helped a lot of people. But for me, exercise makes my symptoms MUCH worse. Both visually and mentally. Even on a brief walk, my symptoms increase exponentially and I get that 'heat wave' effect in the middle of my vision, which I find the most distressing. It's almost completely stopped me from skiing, which Ive grown up doing, because it gets so bad. Is there any types of exercise that might not aggrivate it so much that would be beneficial for me? That might stimulate brain growth and make me healthier? Thank you so much! 

  4. On 1/27/2019 at 10:45 AM, MadDoc said:

    I took kratom once.  I got it from a friend who deals with cronic pain.  What he gave me came from a good source and I didn't take a lot.

    I didn't like it at all.  It made me feel weird, gave me stomach problems, and made me feel shaky.  I was warned that it has a dependency profile and not to take it daily.  I did it once, not for me.

    Valarian just makes me sleepy.  I'm sleepy enough so I never took to this herb either.

    I've tried a bunch of herbal treatments for this disorder but none have helped much.  I do take cbd oil when I have insomnia.  Sobriety and meditation practice worked best for me.

     

    I've already tried kratom a few times before I had HPPD, I'm more concerned about how it'll affect my symptoms now that I have HPPD. It was helpful for my chronic pain, but I'm concerned it might aggravate my hppd or make it worse!

    Ive never tried valerian, thanks for your insight!

    I've been sober for over 6 months of all drugs (i used to be a user of more than a few of them) except for the occasional drink and my nicotine addiction LOL. Meditation doesn't seem to help me at all, only makes it worse )):

    Thank you so much!

  5. My dentist reccomended I get my wisdom teeth removed when I went in for my appointment today. I know it's necessary, but I'm scared that the drugs they give me during/after the procedure will make my HPPD much worse. Wether that's permanently worse or temporarily. There's the anesthetics they use during the procedure & the pain killers after (one is ibprophen and the other is an opiate.) 

    Should I be concerned? My hppd is mild-moderate, but it already interferes with my life quite a bit and I'm rather scared that the drugs could make everything worse. I'm terrified of it reverting back to when I first got it. My symptoms were horrible, and I feel like they're manageable now.

    Any thoughts or advice would be extremely helpful. 

  6. Hi there!

    It definitely sounds like you have HPPD. Welcome aboard. I've also had HPPD for around 5/6 months now, and I know how tough the first few months are. You can feel really scared and alone, and before I got used to it I didn't know what to do. Thats where the forum comes into play. People on here can really help you feel better but also just... less alone. And that's important.

    My first bit of advice is to just stop smoking weed (if you are still doing that). It's a drug that does not mix well with HPPD, and can not only trigger it (it triggered mine) but make your symptoms much worse. Quitting weed is for the better! The first two weeks or so after during withdrawal feel so horrible, but after that, it's a lot better. Quitting all other drugs is also beneficial, both the hard stuff and even stuff like caffeine or nicotine. 

    I also have the sleep disorder stuff. I had very vivid lucid dreams for a few months, but the medication I'm on helps a lot! It's called clonidine. I have a much easier time falling asleep, and my dreams are less vivid and less terrifying as well. It's a blessing. I also take lamictal, which is a mood stabilizer that most other HPPD-ers find doesn't irritate their symptoms. However, medication is up to you and some people prefer to go without. I've also heard klonopin helps. Although they can't solve your visuals, they can help a lot with the emotional symptoms. I'd recommend seeing a doctor if you can find one that'll listen to you. 

    I know it sounds crazy, especially now, but it'll become normal after a while. Please look more at the forum for coping mechanisms and possible supplements that might help you live day to day. But keep in mind, everyone with HPPD is different. Thing that work for others might not work for you, or the other way around! Keep experimenting and keep your head up. We're all in it together. I hope you start feeling better soon ❤️

    • Like 1
  7. On 10/17/2018 at 11:37 AM, Natalie87 said:

    Hi, I’m Natalie and this is my first post. I took mdma for the first time in May. Seriously. I took it once, and here I am.

    June I couldn’t function. The derealization was constant. I was put on Zoloft. Things got worse. 

    Then Paxil in August. Only some improvement.

    I can tell that I’m getting better, but now I’m on Trintellix, and once again, symptoms are getting worse.

     

    I feel like the only time I feel normal is when I’m between SSRIs, but my doctor keeps telling me that’s in my head or whatever. But there seems to be a pattern here.

    The derealization has improved significantly since June. But these SSRIs seem to make me more anxious and depressed. The only thing keeping me functioning is the klonopin. I don’t want to go against my doctor’s advice but I feel like I should stop the Trintellix. 

    I feel like the SSRIs are slowing my progress?

    Any advice is greatly greatly appreciated. 

    From everywhere I've read, SSRI's usually make hppd worse )): Klonopin seems to help some. People with hppd usually try to avoid SSRI's as a treatment for HPPD/depression/anxiety. 

    As much as the general public would have you believe, doctors don't know everything. YOU are your best advocate, period! If your doctor is ignoring your symptoms/thoughts/feelings, especially concerning a medication, that's a red flag for sure. Doctors should always have your care in mind, and unfortunately some do not listen. Not saying that is the case, but even before I had hppd I had a doctor like this. My best advice is do your own research, and advocate for yourself. If your doctor doesn't listen to you about what's not working for you, perhaps it's time to look for another one if you're able. 

    Unfortunatlely, doctors don't usually know much about HPPD. There is no exact pathway for a cure medication wise. Ultimately, do your own research and just know it will take time to find what works for you.

    Try not beat yourself up about how your HPPD came on. Try to focus more on reducing anxiety and focusing on recovery ((: It'll be much better to look forward rather than to be upset about the past, especially something that cannot be changed. Good luck!

    • Like 1
  8. On 11/2/2018 at 9:44 PM, Helenr said:

    Thanks, maybe low stress part time work would be ok . Thanks. 

    You are very kind 

    It would be good to find the best person in Australia  to take my son to see for a second opinion,  so if anyone knows this please let me know. Cheers 

    Good luck! If your son is looking for immediate but short time relief, I've read that benzos ( like xanax or something like that ) can help with that. Unfortunately they're rather addictive if you use them all the time.

    Best bet would be to see a psychiatrist if you're looking for medication. Again, does not work for everyone, but might be worth a try if he is really suffering. If they don't believe your story, keep looking or try to explain. It's hard to find doctors who know a lot, if anything about HPPD. DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH! You are your sons best advocate! Look at possible treatments on this forum or online. Just keep in mind there are no official studies, it's usually a case by case basis.

    Therapy/meditation/reducing anxiety are ways to deal with HPPD without medication. They can help with day to day dealing with hppd. Best of luck to you both.

     

  9. 3 minutes ago, Helenr said:

    Thanks for the info very helpful

    Im a mum of someone with pretty serious hppd. A very general question first... Are you in Australia? And  When u say removing stress really helps does that mean better to live quietly than push yourself to work? Can hppd sufferers get on to disability payments if working is too stressful ? 

    I'm sorry to hear your son has very serious hppd. It's a hard thing to deal with & ik it can be super rough, especially if your symptoms are not easy to ignore )):

    I am unfortunately not in Australia, I'm in america. I can't speak for others on the forum. 

    I think stress & exhaustion make symtoms worse for everyone across the board, so most people try to remove both of those as best to their ability. I've found if I push myself too far, either sleep wise or work wise, my symptoms get way worse /: Many people on this forum recommend meditation, reducing anxiety, maintaining a good sleep schedule, and removing excess stress. Some people go on medication, although there isn't necessarily a 'tried and true' route to fixing/improving hppd. For some it works, for others it does not.

    I don't think people can go on disability for HPPD which is unfortunate since it can really inhibiate people's ability to work, let alone their quality of life. There simply is not enough research on this complicated disorder. 

    I wish you & your son the best of luck! Look on the forum for more info on how your son can improve, but know that ultimately time is the best healer ❤️

     

  10. I developed hppd over 2 months ago. For a while, it seemed to be getting better -- but now i seem to be on the decline. Everyday I wake up & my visual snow is even worse than the day before. I woke up today and the whole room seemed as if it was vibrating. When I first developed hppd I didn't even have visual snow, now I can't even go outside do to night blindness. I keep developing new symptoms... Does that happen??The only difference is that recently I have upped my dose of lamictal of 25 mg to 50 mg, and I am currently taking 0.15 mg of clonidine a day, as well as a benadryl at night to sleep. I don't know what to do. I feel so hopeless, I can't stop thinking of just hanging myself to get away from all this. 

    Should I stop lamictal? could that be affecting my symptoms? I thought it was supposed to improve them. Should I try keppra? I'm desperate. I don't know what to do anymore.

  11. Just now, stupidk said:

    I’m never touching a drug again. I’m just worried it’s going to get worse. I’ve read posts on here that’s people had it very mild and then got it full blown.. I can’t tell if one day I’m going to wake up and have it. I have such bad anxiety over this. 3 months clean now I still drink tho because I’m in college.. also update on my eye exam~ doc said I have no eye floaters in my eyes so that means it’s coming from my brain ... great. 

    I would say even drinking should be avoided. You should give your brain its best shot to heal, and drinking is pretty awful for you all around. Most people have mild hppd & then it gets triggered by something... Not always just out of the blue. It's happened, but I don't think that's always the case. From what I gather, most people's permanent & major hppd was triggered by SOMETHING. Drugs, stress, etc. Try not to focus on the negative what-ifs, that will just increase your anxiety around your symptoms as a whole. Sometimes people wake up with new symptoms or find its worse, but from what I've researched, it gets worse after a triggering event. Don't beat yourself up over doing MDMA once, or think you've completely fried your brain. Your symptoms are extremely mild. I think you'll be fine.

    Many people on the forum find it best to stop all drug use, which I agree with. Abstaining from all drugs is difficult, but gives you the best shot in long run. Instead of focusing on the what-ifs and causing yourself more anxiety, I would say distractions and focusing on stuff to help you heal would be best. You sound like you're experiencing a lot of anxiety, so I would suggest maybe looking for natural ways to calm down. Meditation, breathing exercises, exercising, etc... Time, patience, sobriety, and regulating your body are your best friends hands down. listen to your body. If you are getting early/mild hppd symptoms, avoiding drugs PERIOD is a good call. But if you treat your mind and your body well I'm pretty sure you'll be alright. Take a few deep breaths and stop freaking yourself out by obsessing over possibilities that may or may not happen ❤️

    • Like 1
  12. If you do have HPPD, it sounds rather mild. My best advice is to listen to your body. I would stay away from all drugs, especially psychoactive ones like MDMA/LSD/mushrooms/weed. Yes, even weed... But all in all, don't do ANY drugs. In my experience, the more you focus on your symptoms, the more apparent they become. Anxiety around your symptoms can also make them worse -- it's a vicious cycle, but at least in my experience, focusing on your symptoms & having anxiety around them just makes both the symptoms & anxiety worse. Just stay away from drugs & I'm guessing you'll eventually be alright. Just stay clean, distract yourself, get lots of sleep and try to avoid stress. 

  13. 2 hours ago, stupidk said:

    what were you symptoms before the full blown hppd? were you smoking weed during the mild symptoms you had before the full blown hppd?

    My symptoms were very very mild before the full blown hppd. Slight trails, halos. However, whenever I would smoke weed I would basically start to full on trip -- I had visuals similar to a low dose of mushrooms. I even had mild auditory distortions. Yes, I was smoking weed before the 'full blown hppd'. I only have moderate hppd I believe -- and for that i'm grateful. I didn't know I had hppd before I had my acid flashback smoking weed.

     

    I read your introduction post & in my opinion if you do have hppd, it's very mild. Stay away from all drugs, even nicotine if possible, and I'm guessing it'll go away. Not an expert by any means but it does seem extremely mild & that's my best advice. STAY CLEAN. Don't make the mistake many ppl did on this forum and push your limits ( including me ). You have the warning signs, now listen to them! 

    Best of luck to you ((: 

    • Like 2
  14. 1 hour ago, subzero said:

    Locking himself will increase depression and anxiety. go and do what before hppd you always do , whatever happens to you ,you will develop coping skills to make your life more easier 

    That's not necessarily true, I've found that a lot of stuff I used to do before has caused me even more anxiety. Right now i'm just gonna focus on healing and trying to rest, maybe changing my diet & learning meditation/point mechanisms. Btw, I'm a lady

  15. On 9/14/2018 at 3:56 AM, Jay1 said:

    Inositol worked well for my depression and also has a calming effect. My main advice is to do whatever you can to reduce stress though... If that means locking yourself in a room and watching movies or playing games for the next 3 months.. Do it.. That might mean quitting work or college, but your mental health for the rest of your life is just too important to worry about things that you can rebuild later. 

    I've already been doing this, so great to hear you think that's a good idea... I've been somewhat treating my hppd like a brain injury. Trying to just get lots of sleep, avoid stress, and relax. I've noticed lots of deep sleep seems to improve my symptoms, even just for the day. Thanks again ((:

    • Like 1
  16. On 9/12/2018 at 6:13 AM, cosmiccharlie said:

    Hello, I'm sorry to hear what you are going through but know that there is always hope! First of all you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders, know yourself and know your body and listen to them; sounds like you already are.  Sobriety in my opinion is the best option, plus you are very young and the body/mind are resilient.  Give it time, relax if possible and be as healthy as you can to aid in your recovery.  I have found consistent sleep, regular exercise and a balanced diet all help.  Like you said it will be slow, you might not even notice changes but it will get easier; find what works for you and keep doing it. We are here for your support; take care and good luck. Remember one day at a time. 

    I'm trying my best to give myself the best shot to heal! I think I am actually slowly improving, or at least I'm becoming more acclimated to my symptoms. My head feels more clear than it did initially, although a lot of stuff remains unchanged. I'm trying to keep hope ((: 

    I've been sleeping around 8-10 hours a night, which has helped a lot; I think a lot of people with hppd would agree sleep deprivation makes it a lot worse. What kind of exercise would you reccomend? everytime I've tried exercise, oddly enough it makes my symptoms much worse. 

    Thank you so much for your kind words ((: Like you said, one day at a time.

  17. On 9/12/2018 at 2:46 AM, Jay1 said:

    Welcome to the board... You are still in the early days of hppd, so there is every chance you will start to see a recovery, especially as you were quick to go sober. My personal opinion is not to rush into the meds and just get used to hppd and find your baseline. If nothing has changed in 3-6 months, then maybe start exploring meds... Just my 2 cents

    All the best, Jay

    Thank you for the welcome! That's honestly so nice to hear... I'm trying to make the decisions that will be best for my brain and body. 

    As far as medication goes, I would love to live without them, but the anxiety and depression (which I already suffered from beforehand) have become absolutely unbearable. Is there an alternative to medication you can reccomend? Perhaps some supplements or any other day to day tips? 

  18. Ever since I've developed HPPD, I've noticed that my dreams have become much more vivid and just overall... strange. I've always had vivid and memorable dreams, but nothing like this; I'm dreaming multiple dreams a night that are all distinct and just... odd. They seem to have no basis in reality and are very very bizarre, often having nightmare undertones. Is anyone else experiencing this symptom? If so, have you found anything that gives you relief? please let me know, as it causes me immense anxiety before going to sleep /:

  19. I know exactly what you mean about the 4kHD vision. Ever since I've developed HPPD, i've noticed everything is much sharper & colors are much more vibrant. thats definitely the symptom I mind the least, although sometimes it's strange. It can add to my DR, because it makes the whole world look fake -- Everything seems to be in extreme HD, with sharper outlines and more intense contrast. Whack shit. 

  20. Hello All,

    PS: I'm sorry this is so long, but i'm desperate...

    Although this site seems to be fairly inactive, I am still glad to have found people who also suffer from HPPD. I'm 18, and I only fairly recently developed intense around-the-clock symptoms around a month and a half ago; but I think I may have had very mild HPPD for around 3 or so months before that. I've only done acid once, mushrooms a handful of times, as well as K & a research chemical (given to me without my consent). I think my case is extremely rare, as my initial alarming symptoms were brought on by smoking weed, which was especially disheartening since I have been smoking several times daily since I was 14. It was horrible. I had an indescribable acid flashback that lasted around 26 hours ( I experienced full blown hallucinations, both visual and auditory ), that ended with me taking a trip to the hospital, due to the fact I had believed I had experienced a psychotic break. 

    I have been sober since the incident, except for nicotine, which I also quit a little over 3 weeks ago. So now I'm completely sober. I'm currently also starting lamictal on a low dose (25mg) and I take clonidine x2 times a day for the accompanied extreme anxiety (.5mg x2) 

    My visuals include some of the usual stuff; VS, after images, halos, heightened sharpness/saturation on everything, wavy walls, difficulty focusing on small patterns, tracers, trails, floaters esp while looking at the sky, etc. I also have DR/DP, as well as weird head feelings, tittinitus, and strange dreams. 

    Truthfully, I am on here looking for support, knowledge about my newly developed condition, and just connection with people who understand. I would love to talk to people about HPPD who know what living day to day with this condition is like. No one I know has HPPD and it's scary living life day to day with all my new symptoms. I have hope that they will get better, but I know it's a slow healing process and I would love guidance & just someone to chat about how hard living with HPPD can be, especially being sober. It's difficult. 

    Please reach out if you feel so inclined ❤️

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