olivier24445

After all, this is what I think : My Hppd is a post traumatic stress disorder caused by the use of one time very high dosage hallucinogen, Most of the time it happens to you because during the trip, you become scared to death to never come back normal (pretty common). It match the PTSD chronology, like it does not occur immediately, but after a certain delay 2 to 3 month, Starts with Flashbacks, images of the trauma, depression, depersonalisation, social withdrawal and so on..Intense anxiety/awareness that stays to an abnormal level as "normal condition" I believe the visuals (snow, palinopsia, in my case), are probably created by this permanent state of anxiety and specially they exist in our very case, more than in other PTSD traumas, because of the hallucinogen drug induced experience at the origin of it (instead of a car crash, terrorist attack, and other traumatic events - does not have to be a profound bad trip). To me, there is no brain damage. It's purely anxiety and trauma that get anchored. That's why it gets better when you don't focus on it (like when you're in love / or feel deeply loved, holidays, and so on) The best way to cure it, is to work on this anxiety, understand that we can reverse it completely by doing so. Follow a PTSD healing protocol. Specially, understand that we did NOT destroy/damage our brains. That's my conclusion.

I'm currently testing Lamictal with good results so far (feeling more stable, more grounded in reality) still i'm on very low dosage (about 35 mg/daily) and I'm not sure if it impacts on my visual snow and palinopsia ...Sometime i fell it does a little...Today i came across some horrible posts about withdrawal symptoms... Some people mention it take weeks, and they feel headheache, depresonalisation, moods..So it seems like there is a price to pay in the end ? Would all the benefits go away and things get super worse when we stop ? Anyone has experience of the drug to let us know ?

I'm not sure HPPD has a psychological origin, but i surely had this negative "enmeshment" with my mother. In fact, my worst moments of depersonalisation got triggered by her presence, words, letters, any form of contact or communication. I guess she completely abused me psychologically as a child. I actually don't see her anymore since 20 years, for that reason. Sad, but depersonalisation is a f.... horrible thing, so, that's all i can say. I never had depersonalisation since, only when i got letters, or stuff that made me think about it. At that time, it felt like my emotions where so overwhelming and contradictory (strong love/strong hate) that my mind was just shutting down. I can say drugs at that time were a way to discover myself and the world, but also an escape door.

Following this , you can say now you don't have visual snow anymore at all ?? This could make sense to me, it's like training the brain again to eliminate the noise. Like all training , it needs practice to work, question is, can you make it definitive.

just relax and calm down, it's temporary and need patience. You're not going crazy, it's just a vision disturbance

if not, please try to look for help in one of your real worlds, not on internet. Please.

sure. About Flunarizine, it seems that it's very risky (Parkinson...) so, bad idea...

Anyone knows where is the user who wrote this post gone ? It seems the medication worked very well for him . Any one knows more about Flunarizine or has tried it ?

Worst case scenario, you'll end up with full blown schizophrenia...seen a few exemples recently, and it's not very recreational to this people i believe... If you really want to meet Jesus or Buddha, well, maybe better to wait for your last day on this earth. Enjoy your life , love and stay healthy, bro.

https://www.cell.com/cell-reports/fulltext/S2211-1247(18)30755-1

Interesting :

yes they are some real ignorant people out there, bounded by narrow morals and sheep minded...I guess if you are not conformist, one day or another, you will have to explore drugs, because after all, drugs, when they are not recreational, are a true way to get closer to what we really are and test our body limits. Steve Jobs did it , and see what he came up with...

A visit to the neurologist... So i tried most nootropics legal on sale over the internet, and none of them really had effects on my 20 Yo HPPD . I decided by then to see a proper neurologist to get a Keppra prescription. Mine o mine, i forgot how some people are stupid and narrow minded about drugs... So I picked up a random Neurologist on google map, nearby . After 45 days of wait (that's how long it take to have an appointment in Paris), I finally arrive to the long awaited appointment. The guy seems like a regular doctor, in his 50's...So i started telling him, i had one of a teenagehood , and did drugs a few times (LSD, MDMA and did smoke cannabis).. Then i described the whole thing, and how it started, just after one single very light second LSD take... Him : "Cut the crap" "what are you symptoms then". Me : "I don't do any drugs since 25 years now, i have a very healthy lifestyle, still I have left some visual snow and trails which makes patterns like flash also" Him : "Flash...You LSD don't really give flashback you know, it's in the movies" Me : "I know that perfectly....I'm not making this up. That's not what i'm talking about". I wait , and then he start to explain : Him : "You may have a permanent damage to your optical nerves, we need a scan to see if we can do anything, but i'm very pessimistic". Me : "mmmmmm.....really ? with LSD ????" In fact , there is no way any drug , specially LSD can fry you optical nerve. So i start wondering what level of competence he had, regarding drugs, appart from saying, like most of common people, he heard of "Flashbacks stories".... In the end, I figured out he was treating me in a very mean way, because of the "drug" topic, and because it made me look to him, like some kind of junkie, even if i look very normal and healthy... I was telling him a very painful story and he was just rejecting me because the hallucinogen topic was taboo to him. So I started telling him i doubted i had any damage of some sort, and then I pulled out the HPPD subject. Off course, it was first news to him, and I saw his face starting to decompose right in front of me, as, it happened that i knew a little bit about neurology and brain chemistry in general. The rest of the interview, i could feel he was ashamed of himself as I pulled out some medical reviews about the topic and what medication can be tried to help recovery. Him : "I know I don't know everything, but i will try to learn and figure it out i guess, please forward me the doc in you possession " Me : "That sound better, I'm sure many people do have this HPPD sickness and would be happy to be helped" Him, (sweating) : yes yes, sure, i will review this documents and will get back to you asap. Me : happy face, how much ? Oh 175$ ok there it is... One week later. No news, No prescription, No nothing. I guess, he had second thoughts on how a good christian must treat people who used drugs once in their life. I guess he sticked back to the "Good for you" he started with, after all. I guess he must be happy this way. I guess he wanted me to feel more sorry for myself because i did drugs once in a distant past. At least, HPPD, did elevate me in a place where i know no one should be treated like that, ever. Where i know a good doctor should help his patients and listen to them whatever their story is. Moral of the story : I made more research and found out a real HPPD specialist. I will not contact this B*¨*%* again to waste more of my time. Be warned, there are doctors out there, happy to put the stigma on you, and happy to see your soul bleed because after all, "doing drugs is bad", while they prescribe drugs all the time to other patients, that sometimes, might also fuck their brain and health even more badly. If you need help, don't listen to this doctors who want to bring doom and curse on you. Stay positive. Hppd can be cured already for some people, and will be cured 100% some day.

The cognitive disturbance is the result of permanent sensorial desinhibition created by psychedelics. It's some sort, of gift, the substance let you. Your brain does not process the noise anymore. Maybe what it feels like to have some light autism. Visuals and cognitive disturbance create anxiety loop. So it's a good start to break the loop. Anything can do, work, yoga , sport. Anything. So, i don't know if it's a sickness in itself, because we all become wiser once we tame the anxiety. But still, i'm convinced they are chemicals out there capable to reverse the process. It's a matter of time.

yeah, the during my first year of HPPD, i had pretty intense vertigo problem, with also orthostatic hypotension ( feel super dizzy when standing up). I would recommend checking your diet and exercise , it helped, but also time and patience did fix it. Off course i recovered because i completely stopped using any drugs at that time. I would strongly recommend to stay away from any drugs or alcool during the recovery time.

interesting thread...Please keep us informed. I just wonder, what's the interaction then between hallucinogens and the auto-immune encephalitis ? how come one could trigger a reaction that was non existent before ? . I'm not sur to understand the whole statement here.

same question, and same issue, my visual snow is the last symptom really really still present this day

After a lot of research, i came across this medical review : https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3736944/Very interesting and rare hppd study. Overall, it seems that Lamotrigine has been able to cure long term HPPD like mine is , and for good, or significantly decrease visual disturbances and symptoms. I'm actually testing nootropics on many levels, but i'm willing to step-up to more epileptic oriented drugs. Anyone has more input about Lamotrigine on long lasted HPPD (mine is about 20 years old...) ?

I did not try Oxiracetam yet. I also like GABA, it kicks something at the right place, without fixing it still.

I'm currently experimenting many nootropics, lion's mane , so far is the best to land your feet back on earth. I think the first month of HPPD are the ones with the best chance of full recovery. After, your brain rewire himself differently.

I had my hppd first symptoms 2 month after a giant shroom trip when i was 18. Same intensity. One afternoon later, i was outside with friends, and the change of light between clouds and sun, triggered a memory of that trip. I went exactly into the same reality melting experience you describe. maybe a little less intense. It will all calm down, don't worry. just go with it. but my vision never really came back normal. and i'm like super sharp in my mind, but foggy at the same time, strange. Like super intelligent...in a bit of an autistic way...

Can you give us a precise description of the exercise you did practice, so that other people can try it ? You've been taking acid while doing it ????

very interesting, please keep sharing ! I you find something that works with your visual snow , i'm very interested also It's funny, because 20 years ago, when i was trying to figure out why i was feeling so weird, ( nothing about hppd existing at that time, and internet was brand new...) Well a neurologist diagnosed me "epileptic" after some electroencephalograms measures. He gave me Depakine.....at that time, i was so depressed by that news....Off course, i was not epileptic...at all...so for a long time i believed the guy was completely wrong...but it seems like hppd really goes with some kind of permanent over stimulation of the brain, without any seizures, off course. Also, it might seem stupid to say, but after my mood recovered and adaptation (took a few years) , and i quit all kind of drugs and smoking...well, i became , believe me or not...much more intuitive and let's say it, intelligent...still to this day. Thanks to that overactivity, i became a really really hard workaholic and by then...kind of "rich"...I mean, I was just a regular guy before...bad at school, bad with lots of things in life. Nothing could tell i had any abilities to go that far....I don't know if it's the over-activated brain haha like a super-power, or because i found a second breath in recovering from that deadly trial...hard to tell. I'm really kind of hyperactive, i learn things really fast....it's always like a fast train in my head... If you take it on the spiritual side, it's like some kind of extremely brutal buddhist awakening...I guess. Believe me, now i know myself and accept myself as a whole package. And there is a lot to deal with. Just it goes with a permanent change of mind and perception. And yes. Sometime it's still annoying. I really wonder if it's a good idea to try to cure it. Maybe now that i'm all set in life, i don't need my super powers anymore lol

Oh, it was really a long time ago, a show I saw on the french channel ARTE. I don't remember anything else about it.

You can choose also to see a mystical side in HPPD. Somehow, like you have one foot still stuck out of the "Matrix" out in the spiritual (death) world. I remember once a show where a saw a shaman talking about it and curing it.