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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum


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About scaredsororitygirl

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  1. scaredsororitygirl

    Freaking out, please help

    Hi guys, so I was a heavy weed smoker for at least a year and micro dosed LSD once and enjoyed it, then a couple months later at the end of this July I tripped for the first time and had an anxiety filled trip, I wasn't seeing bad things and can remember good parts of it but I also remember feeling like the world wasn't real, and not wanting to do anything and thinking that I would be stuck in a bad trip forver. In the weeks after I was extremely uncomfortable and feeling so much anxiety because I still felt like I was tripping, slightly. Visual snow, feeling disconnected, and I took a small amount of Valium to continue life, then my father who caused me PTSD from alcoholism had a traumatic brain injury 1 week after the acid trip, and since then it feels like I have been experiencing many of the symptoms on here. Increased visual snow, floaters, especially when looking at a bright light, suicidal thoughts, feeling like the world wasn't real. I've seen many psychiatrists and have been on Klonopin for panic attacks that I thought were related to my father and PTSD, and they started me on Zoloft(ssri) which I thought was causing the insane thoughts. I even went to the hospital convinced I was schizophrenic and no one has mentioned hppd to me. I just don't know what to do and am hoping someone on here can give me some answers because I'm scared I threw my life away because i tripped one time and I don't feel like I could raise a family and continue life into my 70's with these symptoms. Since the trip I have stopped all substance use, and everything but I know tons of people who have done many hallucinogens including my brother and have had none of these symptoms. How do I tell my mom I messed myself up forever? I'm scared to start junior year of college tomorrow

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