Bob Dobalina

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About Bob Dobalina

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  1. Hi

    Sorry, the drugs that did, I forgot, LSD every week for a year, speed, DMT, cocaine, glue and a 2oz a week at one stage weed habit/addiction, including oils, scissor shit, weed vape, I'm down to a qtr a week, none as of tomorrow after finding this site.
  2. I've spent a year with suicidal thoughts because of matazipan, I've been off it for two months and I only consider killing myself twice/ three times a week now, it was several times a day. My motivation for not doing it was 'what if I have to come back and do all this shit again'. I only get floaters and what I call kaleidoscope eyes about twice a week for about an hour, so I've still got no idea what you're going through, I can only imagine and all I can say is hold in there, you can't do it, don't do it. I don't think it's the cowards way out either, I think it takes balls, I managed not to go through with even a part of it, I didn't prepare anything, though I had a plan. Please don't do it, I've just been diagnosed with PTSD and hyperawareness and only learnt of hddp tonight, I don't want to go back to several times a day, I'm starting to have a panic attack now. Please, get on with life the best you can, I'm sure you will be missed.
  3. I'm with you, last night of weed for me, well I'm not throwing it in the bin.
  4. So it turns out the glue, LSD , coke and snoop dogg amounts of weed may have something to do with my PTSD, that I didn't know until two weeks ago, now I have been diagnosed with hyperawarness. Last eighth of weed tonight, not going to bed till it's gone. I know this conversation happened years ago but hopefully at least one of you gets to hear you helped someone. I'm aware of everything that happens and I'm always listening for what's not said, I find that reveals more than what is, I'm always watching for micro expressions. I had a member of staff die under my supervision, I thought PTSD was for soldiers only, it's all fucked, I've spent 20 years upsetting everyone. My councillor showed me the correlation without even knowing the whole truth about my old drug habits, oh I forgot the DMT as well. I am getting help that makes sense for the first time in my life and you have opened my mind to another aspect of it, thank you. Is this just a fancy name for being paranoid?
  5. Hi

    Hi everyone, I found you after many years. i have been diagnosed with PTSD lately, someone under my management died and I can't put it it it's place after many years. My councillor asked if I knew what hyperawarness was, I said 'no, but I have it', he was confused. I told him how many doors were in the corridor outside, about five other things and that he'd had his hair cut. i found an old thread on here about it and have been reading, this is my last night smoking weed, yeah I lied to my councillor. Now I've read of the other symptoms I have realised I have it pretty bad, I have ten weeks of seeing him left, so I need to get my running shoes on. I have to,stop trolling on YouTube and read about people who are going through the same thing, I'd never realised I had a problem. I'm having trouble thinking it's a problem to tell you the truth, you should be aware of your surroundings and not like most people think that when they close a door, everyone vanishes because it's all about them. I don't want to be like that, I like caring and I don't like being had over. But I'm going to pull the stops out and sort this crap,out once and for all, I need a break from me. I hate,contradiction but I'm the worst person at it.