fruitgun

I considered trying Kratom but I am not sure because someone on this site told how Kratom made his symptoms skyrocket long-term. Maybe it was laced with something else, dunno.

Yes MDMA could cause that. I wouldn't worry too much about it, the healing process pretty much works the same no matter what drug caused the condition. Drugs can cause much more and worse symptoms than light sensitivity.

Not sure if that is HPPD, maybe Visual Snow Syndrome (not like it would make much of a difference)

You are living on this earth, so why not wait how things will turn out while you're at it. You will be dead long enough.

Taking all these pills is a risky thing to do with HPPD. If I remember correctly, you mentioned in some post that you tried 10+ (?) medications in less than two years (correct me if I'm wrong). Any medication has to be planned very carefully, including the weeks/ months until the effects fully set in and also including the weeks/ months to completely taper it off. So IMO you should calculate like six months for trying ONE MEDICATION to see how it works for you, after you have intensively researched the effects and side-effects of it and of course have it discussed with your doctor. Taking multiple medications together is, like Fante mentioned, an even more complicated process. Trying so many different medications in such a short amount of time is just very unhealthy and doesn't help your condition at all. Believe me, a lot of the thought processes/ sensations/ whatever you are feeling, are either side effects or withdrawal effecs of the meds you have been taking. You seem to have a tendency to quickly grasp for some relief in form of medication, which is wide-spread in anxious persons. However this is not helping you and you have to get rid of this behavioral patterns. Quit these meds and then WAIT at least two months until it's out of your body. Talk with a therapist, maybe take a benzo if anxiety is too bad. You have this "working on farms" (I forgot how it's called :P) thing that you can look forward to, I am sure this will help. You have not destroyed yourself, you can live a good life, a life of your own. Breathe deeply and slowly. Things will turn out right.

Yes I am a firm believer that prescription medication, taken on a regular basis, only delays recovery. The rewiring and healing of the brain has to happen on a natural basis and can not be forced by pharmaceuticals.

Can you try to describe this headspace?

There can be a cure for anything as long as there is enough research put into it, same thing applies to HPPD. I'm curious about the future.

Many HPPD sufferers reported that SSRIs didn't help them or that it even made their symptoms worse. Can you describe in what way it made your symptoms worse? Also has ANYONE made positive experiences with SSRIs and if yes, in what way? I got prescribed Citalopram a while ago but I didn't really bother to take it because I read so many negative things about it. However I am interested in some more anecdotal evidence for this. Mainly because on DP/DR websites some people report that SSRIs have helped them.

L-Tyrosine makes me feel more focussed, makes me think less about DP/DR and works against depression. However it is stimulating so I take some L-Theanine with it.

Just wanted to update that this symptom has basically disappeared by now.

Dr Abraham recommended Dr Prashant Gogia from Münster, Germany. I didn't try to consult him so far but it might be worth a shot.

Yes it gets better. I had severe brain fog myself and it's gone. I had a feeling of being disconnected from other people and living behind a glass wall and it's gone. I did not know if events took place two days ago or two hours ago. That's gone too. Definitely sounds you like have some sort of DP/DR. Your brain got exhausted from the drug use, now it needs time to recover. Try to live a healthy and active life. Many HPPD sufferers get fired up from exercise, maybe try some yoga or just light exercise for starters. Yoga in general is one of the best things anyone with HPPD and/ or DPDR can do. Also reflect about your life, maybe take care of things which bothered you all these years. When one has DP/DR, it is always a good opportunity to implement some life changes and think about what you want and what you don't want out of life. Don't pay too close attention to people who say that this is a life sentence, it is just not true. If you browse various forums, you see tons of reports of people who improved dramatically, often completely. This "HPPD is forever" attitude is just plain stupid and dangerous, it makes people with this symptoms just more depressed and anxious. Three months is basically nothing for recovering from HPPD, it is like expecting a broken leg to heal in one day. Give it time and patience, live your life and things will get so much better. You have this one life and it's so short, don't waste it by worrying too much.

No, I am taking CBD oil right now and it helps a lot with my mental symptoms. Don't feel like I currently need any additional medication.

Which symptoms does Klonopin help most for? I have never taken any benzo, are you still able to concentrate on tasks while on it?

Your DP/ DR is gone completely? How long did you have it and which symptoms are still remaining?

Have you done a specific drug before this symptom started? Or just cannabis? Has there been any significant life event prior to the symptom outbreak? A big part of your problems can be led to your anxiety and depression. It is the same for me, I don't really have friends, I am unemployed and have money issues. I will start a job or an internship soon because I can't stand being at home alone all day, it makes my mind play evil tricks. Maybe you can find something to keep you busy? Like voluntary work? I am not sure myself if I am already able to work 40 hours per week, maybe I will only do part-time work for starters. But when I am outside and busy, I often don't really feel my symptoms at all. However I am positive that you will improve over time. You already mention that there are days on which you feel fine which means that you can't be completely fucked. Like K.B.Fante said, look out for things that make you feel better or worse. This does not only apply to food but to environmental circumstances in general. And don't worry about being alone with this, you aren't. Many people are getting symptoms like this, including me. Stuff like weird feelings in the head or illogical thoughts rushing through the head even happens to regular anxiety sufferers who never did drugs. edit: Oh and one thing.... you can work an developing a more positive attitude to your symptoms. Sure it can be discomforting, frightening and you might feel intense dread and terror, I know these feelings myself. But when you try to meditate and calmly reflect about it, you might see that there is basically not much to fear and it is just your anxiety telling you that this is bothersome and dangerous. A good therapist can help you developing good techniques for approaching your fears. And if you start to fear your symptoms less, they will subside over time. I would also recommend yoga.... if you can't afford a course, it is very easy to do at home.

I am not sure yet if I regret it. I am having my symptoms for five months now and hoping for recovery. If at least anxiety and DP/ DR will diminish over time, that would be enough for me. However I did what I did because I thought it was the right thing to do. I only did mushrooms twice and second time led to a bad trip which led to my symptom outbreak. Maybe I would regret it if I would not have done mushrooms, I think they can show and teach you a lot of interesting stuff. In fact I believe that a lot of my symptoms have been there before in a minor or suppressed way, I just see or feel it more clearly now. I am not doing any medication at all so far. I guess if it doesn't get better over time, there is some medication that can help. (or I just get used to it)

Never took Klonopin but Jay1 posted his Klonopin routine in another thread. I hope it is still up to date and he does not mind if I post it here: Monday - off Tuesday - off Wednesday - off Thursday 6pm - 1mg Friday 9am - 1.5mg Saturday 9am - 1.5mg Sunday 9am - 1.5mg

Today I got a prescription for Trimipramine. Is this worth a shot? I asked for something that I could take to kill panic/ anxiety attacks and she gave me that. But apparently she might also prescribe me Lorazepam if this doesn't work. Also how helpful are tricyclic antidepressants in general? I am only 4,5 months into HPPD, so I do not plan to take synthetic medicine regularly as long as it might heal naturally. But I am curious and maybe I would take it under moments of extreme anxiety but I will try to avoid it.

Yes I was exaggerating with 100% recovery, I just meant that my progress over the recent weeks made me optimistic and I thought LMM will make me feel even better. So it is kind of a disappointment that it actually makes me feel worse. BTW in this discussion several people mentioned that LMM also increased anxiety for them so it might be a common issue: http://www.longecity.org/forum/topic/18730-lions-main-mushroom/ On other sites I read that it can have a stimulating efffect and one user even claimed that it has some effects similar to DMT lol but not sure if that is correct.

Thanks, I currently think about how I can make my diet more healthy. I have always just stuffed every food inside of me that I felt a desire for, so changing my diet feels like one of the trickier challenges. I might use your post as a basis for my future diet.

I feel really bad today, I do not think I will take LMM ever again. I actually really improved during the recent weeks, but today is awful. I actually thought LMM will be the supplement that will help me achieve 100% recovery soon but it seems to throw me back like two months in recovery. I hope my current state is only temporary and the symptoms will decrease during the next days.

So today I still feel kind of anxious, but I have the impression that my DP/ DR decreased. I feel more like myself. I also seem to look less for visuals or maybe the visuals even decreased. Might be deluding myself there though. @MadDoc: LMM is supposed to help with a lot of stuff, many people say it is one of the few supplements that actually work in healing HPPD. You will find a lot of posts about this online, for quite some people it helped to decrease their anxiety, DP/ DR and even their visuals. @K.B.Fante: Yes I think as long as I am feeling this anxious, I won't take a capsule today. I might only take one capsule every second day. SInce this supplement seems to have a strong effect, it might be enough. Maybe I will take valerian with it do decrease possible anxiety/ nervousness.

Okay I really feel bad, I definitely won't take a capsule today anymore. I am curious how I will feel tomorrow.