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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum


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Everything posted by Onemorestep

  1. Onemorestep


    Unfortunately, after a few weeks on nsi it began to cause anxiety. I still take it every 4th day, but at about a tenth of the 40mg dose I was earlier. The mechanism of action for nsi is under patent and not accessible to anyone except neuralstem so I don’t expect to find out for certain any time soon what may have been causing it. its definitely not as effective the way I’m taking it now, but it’s better than nothing. It’s still a wonderful medication and I’m probably 25 percent more productive and less depressed than I was prior to using it. lastly, I have retained the ability to see colors in full saturation. This doesn’t appear to fade even with a full washout. I’m very pleased with that
  2. Onemorestep


    This is a compound I haven’t seen a whole lot about on this forum. Years ago, I read pretty much the entire longecity thread about it and was surprised more of us didn’t try it as it appears to promote healing in the hippocampus at least. I probably would have tried it back then had I been able to find an easy and reputable source. The patent holder was really shutting things down. and then, very much by accident, I stumbled across it on the irc.bio website and immediately ordered both the sulfate and freebase. It was kind of an impulse decision, as I’m not even sure I’m going to take it. I just couldn’t help myself as I’m kind of a collector of strange supplements and medications at this point. Anyway, if anyone is interested in trying it, it’s there for the taking. Pretty sure irc Bio is closing it’s doors soon though due to increased laws about SARMs and that’s 75 percent of their business.
  3. Onemorestep

    SSRI Experiment

    What were you not clean of prior to three weeks ago? Not to poke holes—but stopping substance use and starting a medication isn’t very controlled. It will be hard to discern whether you are improving because of the medication or from abstinence 😕 many say that ssris need a month for the antidepressant effect to kick in. I think many misconstrue this as meaning the medication isn’t working for the first month. It does have an acute action on the brain and people can respond to that (although more often than not it’s more negative the first month). ssris are tricky for those with hppd. Many don’t react well to them. Some react okay. No rhyme or reason with hppd sometimes! Its a good sign you can still tolerate caffeine many of us don’t have enough inhibitory action going on in our noggins to take stimulants anymore. I miss the taste of a hot cup in the morning! Keep on trucking!
  4. Onemorestep

    Cure for Palinopsia

    Let me know how the VR turns out J. Might give me the push I’ve been waiting for to invest in one
  5. Onemorestep

    Will I have withdrawal from Keppra?

    Also I don’t think you will need to take lorazepam to deal with starting keppra. It’s not likely to make you anxious. Going off keppra however, you could take lorazepam to soften the glutamate spikes that come with going off antiepilectics. I don’t recomend this though. All benzos should be taken sparingly if at all. Mince again it’s a very weird drug. I couldn’t sleep for three days when I started it the first time. I took a single dose of Benedryl and was able to sleep though. After the third day sleep resumed normalcy and even improved over time. If you are anxious about the medication, you can start on a very low dose. I took 75 mg for the first week and then bumped it up to 500. Worked my way up to 1500. It was the closest thing I’ve felt to a cure when it was working. However, after a single dose of methylphenidate, it stopped working for whatever reason. Moral of the story—if it works and you feel cured just stay sober.
  6. Onemorestep

    Will I have withdrawal from Keppra?

    Yes unfortunately you can have withdrawals from keppra. It’s such a complicated drug; it interacts with tons of systems—serotonin, dopamine, glutamate, opioid. It even has effects on the immune system. It’s a drug best tapered. That being said, it isn’t as bad as benzo withdrawals or “hard” drugs. It just should be done properly and slowly. It is an antiepilectic after all. Never good to abruptly discontinue usage of those kinds of drugs. My experience with keppra eas it was pretty easy to come off as long as I went slow. Going fast was very intense. Individual mileage may vary however.
  7. Onemorestep

    jbalsa2's keppra thread

    Very exciting stuff! I hope it’s still working out for you keep a watch out out for increased hair shedding, connective tissue problems, and paradoxical vitamin deficiency symptoms (levels seemed fine, but body wasn’t utilizing them). These were the main ones I experienced.
  8. Onemorestep


    I’m about three weeks into my trial with NSI. In my opinion, it is an INCREDIBLE substance for alleviating depression and promoting mental stability. I feel a sense of security and self that I had lost for so long I had forgotten what it was like. And the effects appear to not only last with cessation of it but actually get better in my experience. Its still early in my trial to be tooting success, but I’m just in such a state of relief I felt the need to say something. So far this has changed my life so much for the better. Obviously, individual mileage may vary. This is not a zero risk substance. But from what I’ve read and experienced, it’s not more dangerous than traditional antidepressants in terms of side effects. ill continue to post about my experience with this compound as time goes on. I’m still tinkering with dosages and want to give it a full rub before I report back. Much love to you all
  9. Onemorestep


    Hi hope! Id love to give an update— so far it’s going pretty well. Sometimes I take it for a week or so and then forget to but I always notice it being a positive thing. It just puts me in a better mood. And if I’m feeling overstimulated from my methylation protocol it helps reduce nerve pain symptoms and if I’m feeling disassociated it can help pull me out .i really give it an a+ particularly because it has very very few side effects I notice. Perhaps s little lighter sleep on the first night or two I take it? I developed hppd many times in my life. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever not felt it since it probably started when I was around 6 with Ritalin. That being said, I didn’t have my first serious stint with it until I abused dextromethorphan when I was 20. I didn’t have any visual problems from it, but the mental ones were there. This largely healed over the course of the next year or so. Then I took mushrooms and developed it really bad. I took six months off of hallucinogens and felt emotionally better but still cognitively impaired somewhat.then I took probably an oz of mushrooms in a month. That really was a dumb idea but I was young and naive. I didn’t even know what hppd was. i had growing and shrinking of objects minorly. Brain fog, surfacing of addictions, depression, etc etc. and then I got nbombed with my friends. Three days later I woke up and the world was absolutely insane. I was a different person. 40 iq points lower. An emotional wreck. Disassociated. Weed made me panic. Dysphoric. I tried to recover with time time but never really did. Eventually a run with a bunch of supplements and most importantly oxiracetam and coluracetam usage has seemed to leave me with permanent brain dysfunction. Oxiracetam and coluracetam left me in a state of hppd that I describe as at least 100 times worse than what I got from traditional hallucinogens. Absolute hell. It’s a miracle I didnt kill myself. God knows I asked my family to do it. years later, and post an indescribable amount of agony, I have managed to regain a large portion of my sanity and emotional functioning. I had to do an enormous amount of research though and try (in a calculated risk vs gain analysis) a lot of different medications and nootropics. I’m happy to say that I’m probably 50 percent back to my old self. Its been a journey and has and has helped me grow in so many ways. People often remark that my views on things are that of an 80 year old man. I think that’s because as we suffer, we grow. It gives an outlook on life that can be positive in a weird way. I don’t take things for granted like a lot of my peers. I relish days of good health and the people in my life. I’m careful with my body and mind; my relationships and emotions. this was honestly a very brief synopsis of my hppd and mental/physical health journey. One day I’ll write a full one, but for now this will have to do 😛
  10. Onemorestep


    Just wanted to make a quick post about my experience with naltrexone. I began regular dosing a few days ago at around 1.5mg at night with the intention of increasing my endorphins through rebound the next day. My experience has been rather pleasant, I must say. My initial impression of it was positive in thag it quickly reduced a headache I had been suffering from for days. I have experienced no negative effects so far. ive begin dosing earlier in the day now because I find it has a wonderful mood stabilizing effect (reduced irritability especially) and reduces my anxiety levels. Additionally, it seems to help my cognition as well. I’m more articulate and focused. It also seems to make me feel physically comfortable; something that is rare for me. roght now I generally dose 1.5mg every 4-6 hours. Im hesitant, because I react badly to lots of different things and something that helps me is apt to turn on me rapidly, but so far it seems this is a good medication for me.
  11. Onemorestep


    Oh boy that is an interesting drug. I have quite a bit of experience with baclofen, although it might not be what you want to hear. i discovered baclofen after I developed chronic muscle clenching all over my body. It got to a point I had trouble breathing without pain and my intestinal system froze completely. This process began when I first developed hppd from mushrooms. My doctor started me on baclofen eventually. the first three days it just made me sleepy after I took it and gave me great sleep. then I had a SERIOUS rebound from it. I was manic looking back on it but it felt too good to stop. It was very GHB like. And this was on VERY small doses (like 5mg spread throughout the day) i kept up with it though because as i increased the dose i dose I did lose my spasticity problems. Another great thing is it durastically improves my cognition to, in some ways, pre hppd. And lastly, it cured me of my addiction to drugs and alcohol. After a time I just had no interest in them. In fact, even if I did imbibe or partake, they often had zero euphoric effects. now for the bad news.... after 8 months on the drug I lost the ability to feel pleasure. It happened very rapidly. I had gotten myself to 100mg a day and I was traveling in Sardinia. One day I woke up, and couldn’t experience pleasure from anything. I tried to listen to music, read, exercise...everything.... and nothing. I immediately started to come off the medication. the withdrawals were pretty intense. Not as bad as benzos, but baclofen increases serotonin as well and it felt more akin to light benzo withdrawal and ssri withdrawal mixed together. I cried for days at a time. Eventually I got down to ten milligrams.... but the anhedonia was still there. It didn’t alleviate with cessation. Not even a little bit. heres the thing about baclofen—it’s a GABA B agonist with cholinergic functions and has a semi permanent effect on brain function in a way we don’t really understand. If you google around, you’ll find that overdose of the drug is alleviated with anticholinergics and that people who take it for alcoholism find that they can eventually stop taking it without the return of previous drug seeking behavior. It definetely does something in the brain and pleasure seeking. For some people it doenst cause anhedonia. For others it can with a single dose. The good news is it did get better, but took several years and as I felt emotionally better my memory and cholinergic functioning returned to its previous state. in my opinion, it is a TERRIBLE idea to bombard GABA neurons consistently. You risk DECOUPLING. I capitalize because I hope you understand how serious that can be. You might as well have brain damage if it occurs because it’s essentially the same. Probably worse. There are some things you can do for brain damage but how do you get receptors to reconnect with each other? In my experience, the only way is a serious amount of time and forcing yourself to go through experiences that require the receptors. that all being said, it’s a hell of a great muscle relaxer. I’ve never had any serious return of spasticity that has lasted for more than a few hours since I took it. For me, I would never EVER want to go through that experience again, but I would also be completely crippled if I hadn’t dealt with the spasticity. My advice to you is is to try to find out what is causing the spasticity. You might have a nutritional deficiency, or problems with methylation or who knows. I found out years later, that a lot of my spasticity was probably caused by potassium deficiency and problems with methylation (although prior head injuries definetely played a role). i know that muscle spasticity is a real pain in the butt and there aren’t a whole lot of treatments. I wish you he best of luck.
  12. I’ve had several bouts/spikes of hppd in my life (I did too many drugs...) and found the ones when I was younger went away much faster and left me with less permanent side effects. I atribute this to the increased plasticity of the brain in youth.
  13. Onemorestep

    Bacopa Brahmi ?

    I’ve taken it for a few weeks. I stopped because it was making me antisocial weirdly enough. Before that happened, I found it quite pleasant. No increase in any symptoms. 😕 alas this is the beast that is hppd—we all react differently to things.
  14. Onemorestep


    Taurine is actually an inhibitory supplement. I believe people think it’s excititory because it’s commonly found in energy drinks. If I had to guess why they put it in them, it’s to smooth out the jittery ness.
  15. Onemorestep

    Cure for Palinopsia

    That is WILD. i just tried it and while the effect only lasted about 15 seconds, I saw the world without static for the first time in years. It looked so crisp. Thank you you so much for sharing this. I’m going to be honest—I never really thought much about my visual snow when it started a few years ago. I had much more extreme problems to deal with that it seemed a small thought. I’d say that I just got used to it. But seeing the world again like that. As a photography enthusiast, I would love to be able to see the world crisp like that all the time. It would be such a relief... ... now we have to see if I can dedicate that kind of time. have you ever tried setting this up with VR?
  16. Onemorestep

    2 realities? (urgent, already in Symptoms)

    Tbh I always really enjoyed that thought process so I wasn’t keeping tabs on when it faded haha. Few months? Realy like everyoje said, keep your brain clean. Especially weed. No weed. Probably for a lot longer than two months. It won’t make you feel good I promise. Best to thing to do when quitting weed is to start a hobby and immerse yourself in it. I learned how to play piano! I highly recommend it especially since you’re already musical.
  17. Onemorestep

    2 realities? (urgent, already in Symptoms)

    Yea I just recommend you stay very sober for a bit and see where’s things settle. You’re brain is realing and you need to give it time to recover and reset. I’ve had similar feelings after doing some really hard psychedelics... took me a while to believe I was living in real reality and not still tripping (DMT comes to mind). sounds... really intense though. Give it time. Best of luck
  18. Onemorestep

    2 realities? (urgent, already in Symptoms)

    This is interesting. I’ve read one other report (it was an article I believe actually) that told of a college student who took lsd and was caught in a state of de ja vi. He described his life just like you did. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-30927102 now, I read a long time ago, so don’t quote me, that de ja vu is actually the smallest of communication lag between the two hemispheres of the brain. Both hemispheres of the brain interpret reality and form a cohesive whole that is you. Psychologists have already proved that the right and left side of the brain have different opinions l, likes, and preferences for things. It makes sense to me that lsd has somehow caused a very tiny lag in communication between your hemispheres. But what to do do about this? It’s hard to say when you don’t know the cause. The only thing hat I KNOW OF that can increase that communication is piracetam and I’m in no way suggesting thst is something you should try. Some people with hppd are okay taking it some are now. Another thing tou coukd do learn to play the piano. This should help both of your hemispheres communicate with each other. Should you decide to take it, be sure to take AN ENORMOUS amount of antioxidants with it. Piracetam and racetam analogies can cause oxidative stress in the hypothalamus which can lead to damage and disregulation. my hypothalamus is fucked because of racetams. I couldn’t feel hunger for two years (thirst for 8 months) and became asexual for 8 months because of a month long trial of oxiracetam and coluracetam
  19. Onemorestep


    I think the person who gave him the nsi said the effect was dose dependent so I assume he has to take it to continue that effect.
  20. Onemorestep


    I also want to state this is a pretty high risk compound in my opinion, As with anything that permanently changes the structure or function of the brain. but... it is FASCINATING. I mean dig around a bit on the internet. The user reports are about as novel as I’ve ever seen. For gods sake one Australian man actually became a genius from using NSI-189. His memory recall is at levels that actually scare me—he says he can tell you what he had for lunch everyday for the last two weeks. While this is out there, and available, MoA is speculation at best. Cant forget this.... really this compound just just makes me really interested for what the future of pharmacology and brain science holds.
  21. This is a bad place to get a yes or no answer for this kind of thing. I will try to be as unbiased as possible in my response to allow you to make your own decision. cons: - some people here are because of DMT so this (hppd) is possible through its use - DMT is arguably the strongest hallucinogen you can find - even if you don’t get hppd, DMT can be a very strong experience, one that I’ve gone through myself, and isn’t always pleasant or beautiful. - you might become “Enlightend”. Whatever that means. Don’t forget, it’s hard to change oneself once you’ve had one of these experiences. You might find you aren’t happy with your life anymore and that’s fine if you have the motivation to change it. You might not. You might become miserable. Pros - While DMT is the strongest hallucinogen, it’s also the shortest acting. Time is an enormous factor when it comes to accruing brain issues due to hallucinogen. I believe that doing DMT is probably better than dropping acid if only because while the effect is enormous, it’s duration is over 60 times shorter than traditional lSD. They don’t call it the businessman’s trip for nothing - you might become “Enlightend”. Whatever that means. Don’t forget, it’s hard to change oneself once you’ve had one of these experiences. You might find you aren’t happy with your life anymore and change it! Personally, I’ve done DMT a handful of times and that was after I got hppd (roughly 18 months after). The only thing I noticed, was if I did it a few days in a row, I would get anxiety. I was kind of shocked to experience that considering how bad I had hppd when it first started. But it could have easily gone the other way. I could have had the neurochemical reaction that causes hppd happen (whatever that is). Or just an awful trip. Hell I broke through into a hospital for a few minutes before I was orbiting stars. That was scary. My friend who supplied it said he’d given it to many people and they were all fine... but once he gave it to a kid who immediately started screaming and ran outside into the yard and started eating dirt for ten minutes while wailing. When he came out of that he had no recollection of what he did. Thank God he didn’t become violent because he could have murdered someone. at the end of the day, this is a very extreme drug. It’s not something to be taken lightly. If you do decide to do it, a calm mindset is important and so is setting. Dont expect that its a one one way trip to enlightenment too. I received 0 spiritual benefits from DMT. It’s just too strong to have rational thoughts when it’s working (at high doses at least). I’ve tried low doses too and while it’s very visually interesting there wasn’t this profound emotional realizing at all. Just a “oh cool, colors and shapes. Now they’re gone. Going to go to class.” I would say don’t do it. You aren’t young, but you aren’t on deaths door. You don’t want to become an active member here. Just do do what I plan to do. When I’m an old man and ready to die, I’m going to the top of a mountain with IV DMT and a tank of nitrous. I’ll have a friend slowly crank up both until I pass while listening to Kreeks Notebook 😛
  22. Hey everyone, lately, I’ve spent a lot of time going over my gene mutations in an attempt to better my health. Knowing what I do know about pharmacology and neurology, I would never have touched hallucinogens had I known about these genes all those years ago.... but thems the breaks. what we, all of us, can do now is get our genes tested and share the results here so we can find some sort of common thread between them. Below is just a short list of some major mutations that I have that can lead to physical, emotional, and cognitive issues. Some of the things that pop out to me are the glutamate to GABA conversion genes and the glutathione lowering ones. No one likes the term excitotoxcicity, however my brain is primed for such an event to occur. A good way way to get your genes tested is to pay for a service like 23andme or ancestry, download your raw data file, and then upload them into one of the many gene mutation websites out there. This is nutrahacker. I like them because they provide a nice and clear outline of what you have, what to use to help, and what to avoid. Other more in depth websites, such as selfdecode, provide a much larger array of mutations and normal genes you have and what they can lead to... but requires a lot of sifting. https://s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/reports.nutrahacker.com/mutationReports/NutraHacker_Complete_Mutation_Report_Customer_028a23b7-9f46-4616-8b5a-39aa49a6e692.pdf i realize too that there is a cost associated with this and it’s not a small one. I’m not sure what 23andme charges now, but I believe it’s about $200. Nutrahacker is below $50 and selfdecode is a paid subscription website (you’ll see why if you visit. It’s in depth.) Remember, it’s a one time fee for the first two at least. Once you do it, you have these forever. I would never go to a psych or doctor without a print out of these now and I know my doctor would never have prescribed me certain meds that I had either strange reactions to or outright bad ones had he had this information. Were all here to better ourselfs. In this way, we can do just that and perhaps begin to unravel a common theme between us that is deeper than what we took and how we feel. Maybe we can figure out why. best, oms
  23. Onemorestep


    Now this is kind of interesting. Visual snow guy getting reduced symptoms: What’s really weird is it’s a chemical analog of DMT.... now that can mean s lot or really mean nothing. Analogues can have completely different effects from their parent compound. Still, interesting to note.
  24. @rafiki did you find something else to ask for? i would show your doctor the quote I posted in this thread about the role agomelatine has on glutamate. Perhaps you can find another medication that explores a similar MoA since you responded well.

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