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K.B.Fante last won the day on September 21

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About K.B.Fante

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  1. Not complaining about the publicity but I really wish there was an in depth article somewhere online. This is such a complex and mysterious disorder and all we have is just a few articles here or there that touch on the fact people are perhaps permanently scarred from drug use. You'd think more people would want to listen but it goes against the culture of drugs being cool so I think people dismiss it. I've never heard of anyone getting HPPD years later from drinking though. Anybody else?
  2. "The Brain that Changes Itself" is also a great read. Very encouraging for HPPDers. Neurodegeneration may have been the wrong word. All I meant was cellular death but there are a variety of different terms for it depending on how it occurs.
  3. I tend to agree. The limbic system, from what very limited knowledge I have of the brain, makes sense. That said, I don't think we should rule out the cause being our brains attacking themselves in response to the drugs which then caused neurodegeneration. I know for example that after I initially got HPPD I had severe brain fog which Dr. Kharrazian has said is a sign of a cellular cleaning process. I've always thought this could be an indication my brain just kept on attacked itself even long after the acid left my system. I have psoriasis and possibly an autoimmune thyroid condition as well. My whole family has autoimmunity too.
  4. I've never heard of anyone having their HPPD permanently worsen due to alcohol. Pretty interesting considering this is thought of as a disorder strictly obtained and exacerbated via hard drugs. I think it's stories like yours, in addition to people with Visual Snow Syndrome and those who get HPPD-like symptoms through exposure to toxic chemicals, who basically confirm how complex this disorder is in terms of its origins and ongoing evolution. There's clearly something inside our brains that doesn't agree with the chemistry of the modern world... In terms of alcohol consumption, I've thought about drinking again. I'm not recovered yet, and I've been sober for 2.5 years now, but I also want to be able to enjoy like socially again when I feel comfortable. I don't know what this means in terms of alcohol, but I know for sure I don't ever want to drink heavily again. I just can't figure out if I'll be able to tolerate a little alcohol here and there without binging. Ideally if I can find enough purpose in my life I won't need it.
  5. Stay busy. The more you think about it the more you'll drive yourself crazy. As long as you keep yourself going and keep your mind off it you'll at least be able to make it through the day.
  6. Just thought I'd post an update on this... In the past month or so I've strayed pretty far from my diet, especially with regards to nightshades, mostly because I want to be a bit more liberal with how I eat but also to do a bit of experimentation and see how I feel eating like I used to. Given it's fall where I live there's all sorts of tomatoes and produce coming off and I've pretty much eaten however many nightshades I want. After about three weeks I can say without a doubt that nightshades are like poison to me. All my HPPD symptoms have flared up and ones I thought I totally overcame sorta returned, although in a much milder manner. My snow increased, my DP got way worse, my voice sounded much more distant, tinnitus returned a bit here and there, and in general I just felt like I'd been poisoned, sorta in the same manner as when I ate too much nutmeg recently. In fact, one night I went all out and put okra, tomatoes and eggplant in a curry (all three being nightshades) and after dinner I pretty much felt like I was tripping. My whole body felt tingly, I could hardly complete a sentence, my heartbeat was rapid and I felt like blood was rushing to every part of my body. I know everyone's body is different but nightshades have natural pesticides that, when consumed in large amounts, can act like poison. I'm not here to suggest everyone completely eliminate them but I really think taking it easy on potatoes and tomatoes especially (which are staples of the Western diet) would be wise. If you're skeptical I'd encourage you to buy a week's worth of nightshades and see how you feel after eating them every day. I also noticed that they add up (again, just like nutmeg) and that even after ceasing to consume them I still feel the effects days later.
  7. I agree. I hope I didn't sound like I think this thing can't be beat by everyone. I truly believe that as long as you return the body to its natural state it will heal. I'm experiencing this in my own recovery and there are plenty of stories that prove this as well. Also with so much research geared towards neurogenesis it's only a matter of time before there's access to medication that might totally reverse HPPD if it is in fact some form of cell destruction.
  8. If you got HPPD in 2009 and continued taking drugs, especially psychedelics, then you could theoretically have prevented yourself from healing by aggravating whatever damage had occurred after the initial injury. Also, it's really difficult to assess your situation if the only information you provide is that your symptoms worsened in 2015. There could be an entire range of different reasons as to why your symptoms worsened. I know you've mentioned you've tried many different medications, often in combination with one another, and this is one of the main culprits of worsening symptoms. I can't even eat a certain combination of common organic foods without my symptoms worsening so it wouldn't be much of a surprise if your symptoms worsened for a variety of different reasons, especially pharmaceuticals. I'm still a novice when it comes to neuroscience but my understanding is that upon initial injury the nerve dendrites are what's potentially damaged and that as long as drugs and other toxic substances are hence abstained from then those branches of the cell can regrow, but if damage is further exacerbated then the entire cell could be at risk of necrosis which is why remaining drug free during recovery is so crucial. This isn't to say those who have HPPD for more than five years can't eventually recover, especially given the advances in neuroscience right now, but doing it the natural route doesn't appear likely. Although again, I'm no scientist. If anybody would like to correct any of the above information I'd encourage you to do so.
  9. Update: So I tried another dose of vinpocetine the other day and I thought it worsened my symptoms which is odd because I took it before and didn't notice much. Additionally, this was a day after I took huperzine which I also thought worsened my symptoms in the same manner. Then this morning I took neither of these and my symptoms were still worsened! Clearly there was something I was eating or taking that was making my symptoms worse independent of the two drugs above since my symptoms worsened all three days with and without taking the drugs. I'm usually really good at pinpointing what makes my symptoms worse but I'm at a bit of a loss this time around. I truly can't figure it out. Anyway, I think this just goes to show that there's neurotoxins, bacteria and pesticides everywhere these days and if you're not careful with what you eat you could be experiencing worsening symptoms even without taking any drugs or other substances that are known to aggravate visuals. Again, a clean, healthy lifestyle is pretty much your best friend in trying to battle this awful disease -- yet even then you can sometimes run into a bad string of something or other and not know what it is.
  10. Man, I've never heard of either but if I had to chose I think cerebrolysin sounds more promising. That said, I don't think I'd try it. Perhaps if I was desperate. Injecting pig brains into my body via needle just doesn't sound all that appealing. Also my experience with nootropics is that they're often stimulating which runs counter to what you need for HPPD recovery. Almost any sort of stimulant makes symptoms worse to some degree. Maybe this isn't the case for everyone and every nootropic but it certainly applies in my scenario. Additionally, exercise is the best known method to increase neurogensis. Same goes for eating healthy, sleep and getting adequate sunlight. Sure, nootropics can help, but there's so many other safer routes to recovery that are proven to work. It just takes a lot of effort and a lot of time.
  11. I'm convinced that so many people's problems are dietary. If you have HPPD you likely cannot handle caffeine or any sort of stimulant without worsening symptoms. If you're drinking multiple energy drinks a day then you're constantly making your symptoms worse. There's a long list of substances that aggravate symptoms on this site. I'd suggest you check it out so you know which things you can and cannot consume. Caffeine is absolutely at the top of the list.
  12. I buy powdered bulk turmeric from Natural Grocers for dirt cheap. I think it's only a few dollars and lasts me about six months or more. I take half a teaspoon but at one point I took a whole teaspoon a day. I'm not sure how many mgs that is but like always you're better off starting slow then working your way up.
  13. Yeah, those two are as good as it gets when it comes to herbs and natural healing. As you say, bacopa has a tremendous amount of healing properties but I don't know if anything more dramatic than turmeric. It just seems like everywhere I look, everything I read, turmeric is always near the top in terms of substances that have benefits in a wide scope of different areas. I've posted this before but it's a great little rundown of how effective it is: http://www.greenmedinfo.com/blog/science-confirms-turmeric-effective-14-drugs I've been taking both bacopa and turmeric for the last year and have had no side effects from either. They're also both great for mood stabilization if you're struggling with depression or anxiety.
  14. Just to amend the above statement, I actually took another dose of huperzine today and felt way different than before. I might have taken more, but either way I felt really odd, almost like I was high, a little spaced out, almost dissociated. I wouldn't say it was painful or made my symptoms worse, but it wasn't exactly comforting either. Like always, you're better off microdosing and building your tolerance up if you desire to increase the dosage.
  15. I hardly ever see macropsia mentioned and it's probably my worse symptom.