trip into hell

it took me about 4 1/2 month or so...but was pretty intense and debilitating....its one of the things in my life where i thought it would never go away...that is said..i still get panic attacks when i take more than a micro dose of any mind altering substance...but the hppd has never returned...im so glad and grateful...i wish everybody could find a way to get through hppd.

when i had hppd it was one of the symptoms that caused me to think about suicide a lot....

dp/dr issues increased by weed..thats true for the most people...i can smoke weed again in micro doses and it makes me feel very high for half of the day but dp/dr never comes back..when i smoke too much and get a panic attack i can see my thoughts materializing out of visual snow..very scary stuff...but as frightening as it is, the effects always subside after i come down a little bit more..and the panic turns into a very pleasant and grateful feeling/high ...nevertheless i would never recommend this to anyone else...cause it can really make you freak out for a while... ...dont do drugs gman

dont forget that dp/dr causes depression because it destroys your entire life XD

what you desire is impossible.... and asking jay if theres a real cure for this..is not very intelligent (sry)...dont you think jay would have cured himself already if so... man..dont fight it just let it come over you...and accept that it will be there for the rest of your days...dont take your life too serious and forget about the world...constantly thinking about how bad your condition is wont cure you but will just make the unchangeable feel worse. ...have a nice day...

well well..as stupid and ignorant as ever...you just make me laugh XD...you dont know anything about my life and i wouldnt exchange mine for yours either...because im almost out of it despite doing drugs you genius XXD!!!...and you need to read with more attention..i said drugs were not the root cause so quitting them cant heal someone..but i didnt mention that it couldnt be helpful to come to terms at first..anyways i gave no recommendations here..it was just my take of it...+ the evidence of this theory is me...so calm down and stop judging me cause youre jealous and have a shitty existence...its not my fault.

that wont help...drugs are not the root cause...so quitting them cant heal you...

well it was not that heavy as most peoples drug usage..but youre right sometimes it was a little heavier than usual. i didnt suffer more than i enjoyed it..my enjoyment took 8 years and my suffering only 1y and 2m....of course i still suffer a little but thats not really fucking me up anymore..it slowly turnes into enjoyment again..XD and no i think nicotine addiction is not that easy to quit..but im about to do it and already reduced my dose.. i cant take it personally..because its your experience..what you learned for yourself is your decision and is based on your legacy...im not mad at you or anyone for having an opinion...

if you feel thats the best way for you..its good i think you are a bit too absolute here and make it too easy for yourself just saying its all shit 'n' stuff sounds like you never learned from your experiences or just had the wrong.. even though it might still be true for you cause you didnt have the right eperiences...the experiences i had were so profound that i know i have got a better person and more open minded + i feel more intelligent and love than before..if i would be my old self im sure i wouldnt have come that far without these substances...what i witnessed couldnt be imagined before and is still impossible to describe...im thankful..for the gift..i cant be judging here just because i made mistakes in the end..ive even learned from that

yeah i realized this..but it is something you can only recover from by doing the right things to support a cure (just as wiith hppd/dp/dr)...and staying healthy is never a bad thing...now when it comes to drugs..they arent actually bad for us (at least most of them) but the wrong application is always bad no matter what we talk about...so what i want to say is: if i had hppd/dp/dr doesnt mean i cant ever enjoy drugs again without bringing it back..it just means i have to take a long break from it and do it carefully in the right way when i decide to try again. and even i was experienced but i made mistakes at the time..we cant know if these people are really concious about having made mistakes and just say they didnt do anything wrong due to this...or some are to ashamed to really tell the truth and admit they did it wrong/abused it....for example if someone never had a bad trip doesnt mean he/she did everything right...its also the motive and that people mostly take it too often and dont fully embrace their experiences and start the next trip already..i didnt say one could think away a neurological problem..sure it helps a bit but thats not what cures someone..just as we are not what we think or say..we are what we do..but it starts with thoughts. my brain recovered from hppd..but whats the actual cause of this...what makes me different from other people..im usually not a lucky guy and more sensitive than everyone i know. saying far more knowledgable..what do you mean...is it because they learned something or read something more..our science is not as far as we think.. status symbols and the usage of foreign words mean nothing to me..what matters is experience... i have so many anti anxiety naturals and they do a good job for the most part..but these prescription meds are something i cant get my hands on. ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ even the truth is nothing absolute.

i love myself for smoking weed again XD.... seriously gman...just give yourself a break...you can still smoke weed years later in your life...it will always be around...and if it leads back to hppd/dp/dr, you could still stop it...but dont put yourself under pressure..relax and forget about drugs for a long time...

if so...why did my hppd go away completely?...i mean im sure youre right and there are neurological changes in the brain..they might be reversable...i think its the same as learning something...we dont forget how to ride a bike..we learned it and psychedelics teach us way faster than we do normally...its linked to neurogenesis...the thing is that a tool is just as good as its user..and if we use it with the wrong motive behind (too often, overdoses, setting etc.), it leads to false/bad neurogenesis..i guess this is where hppd/dp/dr/anxiety occurs...and as bad as the mistakes were and as long as people dwell on this condition the more stable will these connections get...just my theory about it..but to me the most logic and i can speak about it since i am still a very experienced tripper. and dont forget that i just want to smoke weed...it wouldnt be bad to be able to take other durgs too but at this point..i gave it up cause i still need the break.and feel there is something very important going on in my head.

thats not true...drugs do not cause hppd/dp/dr/anxiety...they just have the potential to trigger it..as many other things...so at maximum it is an indirect result of drugs (just one of many possible triggers) to get back to me...it is anxiety i have to deal with and the fact it was triggered by too much mental stress (overdose) is a sign that i ran out of coping strategies at that time...typical for sensitive people like me..the bad thing is that i had to find it out the hard way..so now i need to get out of the vicious cycle of anxiety and thats a real battle...i dont see a point in giving up my dreams just to live sober till i die for nothing but dwelling on myself in a world where ill never be able to be happy... i have to chase my dream..

oh i didnt forget..the thing between my ears is just a bunch of crap..so it needs to be ignored sometimes..i know its a tough thing to do.. but i will have to manage it or i swear one day ill smash my head

true..mental...physical...you can not completely seperate one from the other...but some issues start mentally and get physically and others start physically and get mentally...its always important what direction the issue originates from, cause thats where one needs to refer to, to resolve it...sometimes it becomes a vicious cycle over time and its a little more complicated to succeed..

im sure i wont quit cause i have a lot of stamina..thats my strength... i think the problem for me is to quit nicotine..

hm..lets see..ill try it..but first of all i need to get rid of my nicotine addiction...which is a real battle for me cause i enjoy the fuck out of it

its not quite true..anxiety/panic (in my case) can be a 100% eliminated since its not physical...cancer is..and thats why cancer will always mean a risk for its sufferers

damn it...dont make fun of me man...im serious..I CAN DO IT!!! RRRRR!!!...ill do sports to cure me and then i turn smoking weed into my extreme sports

take more

ill start doing sports regulary because i want to smoke weed again when im cured XD

i agree with you...dp/dr/anxiety are the worst things ive ever experienced and if they go away completely and never return...youre cured...thats it.... hppd: 100% cured, anxiety/dpd 75% cured ...i hope my anxiety goes away soon..then im cured from dpd completely..i feel im about to change somehow...

well i cant tell you how its about haloperidol but im tapering of nicotine at this time...not because its not enjoyable anymore...i really enjoy to smoke cigs...but i think its not good for me in general..and i fear withdrawl symptoms too..since nicotine is also a very addictive drug...all i want to say is.. i can feel with you somehow.

the problem is its not really social anxiety or something i could find a name for..to my mind it seems to be experience in general that makes me anxious, due to my nonexistent well being...it turns everything i do into hell...dont know how to stop it anymore...never ending downward spiral...i think one day i will give up my life... i see..

man...you belong to the lucky ones...i can only smoke tiny amounts without panic... how long did it take you to be able to enjoy it?