"Early years (pre DP). You mention sensory sensitive. Were there things more than just light and sunglasses? Sound? Being around arguments? Concentration?"
Sound also to an extent, in the sense of not being able to sleep with a dog barking or something. I have always been emotionally sensitive (empathetic for others but also heavily affected by listening to things like sad music, or if someone says something negative to me.
"What subjects did you do best in school? (math, sports, science, language, art, etc..)"
My strongest subjects are music and language. I was decent in other subjects, but music (I play a few instruments and can learn songs by ear etc) and studying foreign language are what I do best.
"DP from weed. How severe is it? 24/7? Can't feel anything or just 'blunted'? Difficult feeling pleasure or motivation?"
ome days are worse than others but I basically feel it 24/7. If I am watching a movie or playing piano or something, I won't think about it. But when I am going through my daily life, it often feels as though I am watching myself do things as a passive observer. I have perfect knowledge of what's going on, but it's just a bizarre, and often disconcerting feeling of being out of my body. I can feel things. In fact I think I can feel everything I think. But I often have trouble experiencing it in the moment. Sometimes I will go through an experience in a very depersonalized way and then experience the resulting emotion later on. It's an interpersonal issue, which makes having a girlfriend difficult for me. Motivation is a bit difficult for me, but I am working on it lol. To be honest though, at this point, I am more focused on my sensory overload issues, because those are the ones that cause me the most agony.
"After LSD. Are you hypersensitive to motion or just shadows? It is worse in your peripheral vision or central vision?"
Not hypersensitive to motion in general, just shadows. And it is much worse in my peripheral vision. If I stare right at shadows, they are less bothersome than if it they are existing in my peripherals.
"You are calmest and feel best in the morning. In the afternoon, do you feel better after a brief nap?"
Actually, the morning is often difficult for me. Usually starting my day is one of the tougher points of the day. Then things tend to get better in the afternoon on through early evening. Then when the sun starts going down, I have the most problems. I don't often take naps, but I think they do help occasionally when I feel worn out.
"Any other changes you now live with? (fatigue, coordination, digestion, libido, ...)"
No, I don't experience much else. Sure, I have fatigue, but nothing outside the realm of what's probably normal. I am actually pretty healthy in most ways I think. I run every day like 4-5 miles. My doctor check-ups go pretty well. DP affects my ability for closeness with people, so sometimes intimate moments too. But my libido is there.
Meds. Have you taken anything besides Xanax?
Yes, for a few years I took unprescribed Vicodin. They made me feel warm and cozy, even during symptom times. But I began to worry that I was messing with the dopamine receptors/pleasure circuitry in my brain, so I stopped taking them cold turkey one day. I had a tough time for awhile and then eventually was prescribed Xanax. I haven't taken much else, besides Omega 3 when I think of it.
Have you had a prolactin and testosterone test?
Yes, I had a testosterone test (possibly prolactin also) a few years ago. It came back normal.
Thanks Visual! (Thanks also Jay!)
DJ