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About Hppdlife

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  1. fuck me, 4 years of this shit lol thanks for all your replies, you lot really helped me out when i was a scared 16 year old not knowing what was happening to me.. find it funny that i've been to so many different psychiatrists/psychologists and not a single one of them had ever heard of HPPD.. all i'm dealing with now is the depression & anxiety (especially social anxiety) which i only developed when i was spinning the fuck out and tripping constantly, depth perception is still a little odd & of course the classic visual snow is still here but oh well, it's gradually getting better for the new hppd people, you will get better. stay sober as soon as you begin to develop any symptoms - thats where i messed up.
  2. wow i wrote this 2 years ago and i'm still sat here with this bullshit lol.
  3. It's just annoying how I'm only young and I fucking loved drugs, now all my friends are still doing them all the time and having the best time of there lives and then if I sniff anything my brain is on a mad one. I dropped out of college because I found it to hard to focus in lessons when I'd suddenly start feeling all trippy and spaced out. Although when I first noticed all the symptoms I did just ignore it and kept taking acid, which kinda fucked me over as I was insanely paranoid, like I would actually see my friends talking about me but it was me actually tripping out lol I thought I was actually going insane at one point. The amount of times I've been so so close to suicide. Sorry to keep going on but you are the only people that I can actually talk to about this and I've basically been on my own with my thoughts since day 1.
  4. I have had it since march last year and I did give up weed cause as soon as I smoked it, I would basically be sent into a different world but I managed to get through it and it was the only thing making me happy. I have been 30 days without smoking weed now and my visual snow has calmed down a lot. Does anyone else feel like there depth perception is fucked? Like almost 2D and everything looks strangely outlined? This is the most horrible thing and the fact every time I try to talk to someone about it I get bad 'acid like' vibes and incredibly bad anxiety which just makes me want to stop talking about it, honestly I feel like my life ended a year ago.. Nothing makes me happy and I can't be bothered with this constant tripping. If I don't find any medication in the uk that I can take (I'm 17) then I am fucking done with life, why does this have to happen to me lol
  5. I've been 10 days without smoking weed now but I'm starting to suffer from really bad depression, and none of my symptoms have calmed down. What is the best medication for it? This is bullshit, I've developed paranoia, depression & anxiety in the past year. Before ever touching acid I was completely normal human being with nothing to worry about
  6. I've had hppd for a year now and it has completely ruined my life, I'm always either paranoid/depressed and about 5 months after getting hppd I got social anxiety. I have bad visual snow and everything in my vision looks weirdly outlined?! Nobody believes me and my whole life basically feels like a trip? I haven't done any acid but I still smoke weed everyday but it's basically the only thing that keeps me sane lol I have no idea what to do with myself and half of the time I'm thinking whether my life is worth living anymore, anybody else get any of the same shit happen? How long have you guys had it and do you know anyone that's actually fully recovered from this or are we all fucked?