Jump to content
Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum

hppdvictim92

Members
  • Content Count

    17
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    1

hppdvictim92 last won the day on February 8 2017

hppdvictim92 had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

1 Neutral

2 Followers

About hppdvictim92

  • Rank
    Member

Recent Profile Visitors

1,278 profile views
  1. Has anyone here ever visited Dr. Gogia yet? I will soon I guess.
  2. I sometimes do Phenibut. It helps for anxiety and sleep problems. But it didn't do anything for the visual symptoms. Regarding Etizolam I have no experience. But I would advice you to get the "real" Benzos if you want to try that, because they are probably more safe to use. Please be very careful about Benzos. They can be extremly hard to quit and you should probably try to recover on your own.
  3. Hi germanuser! Don't worry. So you just stopped smoking weed 2 weeks ago? Please do yourself a favor: If you can't stay sober, please, PLEASE search for addiction treatment. Otherwise you might become permanently worse. It's very important to stay sober for as long as possible (=forever!). You won't recover if you continue doing any drugs. 2 weeks is literally nothing. Even one year is not much time. I have HPPD for 7 years now. I continued doing drugs after I got HPPD for about a year. BIG MISTAKE. Please DON'T do the same. I started feeling recovery 2 years after my last drug use. And now (5 years after last drug abuse) I feel like 80-90% of my symptoms are better. Often I can barely notice HPPD anymore, just when I concentrate on the symptoms. It doesn't affect me anymore and I am very glad about that. I would still have full HPPD if I didn't stay away from any drugs (in my case including alcohol an cigarettes). You can also talk to me in German via PM if you'd like to!
  4. Depends on time and day I would say 60-90% improvement. Mostly 80%. Way better than in the past. Maybe the first two years were the worst. Then it became gradually better. It's not just coping with that stuff, it really became better. I still have visual snow and sometimes mild negative afterimages and sometimes flashbacks from the LSD trip. But it's really better. Also no anxiety/panic regarding HPPD anymore. Symptoms temporarily get worse when I have no sleep for 24+ hours though. Most of the time I don't think about HPPD anymore. Just sometimes, then I re-visit this forum.
  5. Hallo germanuser! Nice to see someone from Germany here. ^^ I suffer from really bad sleep. But I had sleep disorders already pre-HPPD + I suffer from chronic double depression. I don't know what helps, but probably having some input at day. When I'm just at home, sitting in front of the computer all the time, being in my own thoughts... that's pretty bad, because I am stuck in compulsive thoughts. Having something else to think about makes it easier not to think about all the worries when going to sleep. I think it's really important to be relaxed when laying in bed at nighttime. Nightmares get worse when my thoughts circle around all the negativity before sleep for me.
  6. I got HPPD about half a year after my first LSD trip as far as I remember. I smoked week in the meanwhile although.
  7. Done. Thank you for your work on this subject. We all here really appreciate your work!
  8. Have you told your parents about how you are feeling already?
  9. This might be some kind of temporarily drug-induced psychosis or some other kind of depersonalization. You should stop all drug use now and try to find a psychiatrist as soon as possible I would say.
  10. You need a rehab for your drug addiction. There is help for sure. I did this and I'm abstinent now. Find a rehab clinic for your addiction. Go to your doctor and tell him that you have a drug problem and need help as soon as possible because you can't stop. Doc will help you. You are going to be drug free I'm sure. Don't tell yourself it's not possible to become rid of it. I also did. I know the first time it's hard. I was in a clinic and in the first time you have difficulties for sure but also because you're in a clinic where everyone just wants to get rid of addiction you have motivation to do so also you're out of your current environment and you have time to really change. Please do it! It's not "too late".
  11. Hello folks, I just stood up as every morning and... still there's this shit. I don't want this anymore. Seriously. I'm from Germany, I'm 24 now and still in high school. I have been on leave for about 3 years because of my problems. I did LSD and several other drugs including MDMA, amphetamines, DXM and cannabis starting with cannabis at the age of about 18 for about 3 years. My last LSD trip was in 2013. I did LSD 5 times. I was in rehab for my drug abuse and I'm in a psychotherapy since about 1.5 years now. In 2015 I continued school and I will hopefully finish it this year. But I feel like I messed up my whole life. Seriously. Everyone in my age here is finishing university now while I havn't even started. They have good jobs and some are in an age where they raise a family. And what do I have? I have fucking nothing. Well it doesn't matter what I have now for sure. That's true. What matters is how I will be in 10 or 20 years you think? It's true but we all know what is in 10 or 20 years. I am still going to have this shit. And it's just fucking destroying my life. I can't concentrate, I can't learn. I can't anything. It's just not possible to do anything rather than sitting in front of my computer everyday. I'm glad there's the internet for sure so I can still talk to some guys on Skype. I'm not sure if it's really HPPD. My mother is schizophrenic and maybe it's just some form of schizophrenia. I have mainly visual hallucinations, brain-fog, depression.I don't have any other hallucinations but who knows. From the images on the internet I saw about HPPD it looks similar, but a little bit different. I'm also not sure if I should call my visual snow really visual snow because it's too intense somehow. I got a lot meds in rehab. Neuroleptics did nothing to me, benzodiazepines work well. The problem is: I also became a benzodiazpine addict in 2013 so I'm not even allowed to do benzodiazepines anymore. I just don't have any relief now. I'm on antidepressants and they help a little bit with sleep and anxiety. I sleep about 10-12 hours a day, sometimes I sleep even longer just to escape reality. I'm so scared of this shit I even dream about HPPD symptoms every night. I think about commiting suicide every day. Psychiatrists can't help me. A doctor even told me "What should I do? What have you thought what I can do about it before you visited me?". In Germany also no one knows anything about HPPD because here the ICD-10 classification system is used and there is no equivalent diagnosis for HPPD like in the DSM system. If you tell them you read something about it on the internet they think you're just hypochondric. Therapist can't help me. I even thought about I might be just hypochondric. Who knows. And please don't tell me to exercise, taking vitamins and eating good and all that stuff. We all know it doesn't help a shit, it's just a placebo effect. Just be honest. Maybe not even HPPD is the main problem. Maybe just my depression because HPPD always reminds me of my drug abuse. It's always somehow subversively "telling" me "Look you have been such an idiot... you deserve this shit. How could you do any drugs? Everyone knows they are harmful and know it's your responsibility you have to take. Don't cry you little bitch!". I can't accept it. I just want this nightmare to end, but it won't ever end. I want to go back in time and change everything. I can't accept I got this shit because I was stupid when I was younger and now I'm 24 and still have this shit and I'll be soon 30 years old, just in 6 short years and nothing changes. I don't know what I should do anymore. I just have messed up my life. I still want to study but I'm not sure if I will ever be able to function in life. I want a normal job where I can live from. And now we see this nationalist movements everywhere in the world and globalisiation. It's just a question of time and there probably won't even be any social security systems anymore. How will I live then when I'm not able to have job? HOW? Will a rob a bank to pay my rent because I have no other options and will end up in jail? Seriously, that's what I think about life and politics at the moment. I see I'm getting a little bit off topic. But that's how I feel at the moment. edit: I didn't do any drugs for about 2 years now, no alcohol and no nicotine by the way.
  12. Well I just take it with irony at the moment. By day it is not such a great problem for me because I can mostly ignore it. It is a very great problem when I try to sleep. It is impossible for me without meds... I have every symptom of HPPD I think. Seriously everyone including DR/DP. Plus panic attacks (up to 5 times a day...) while trying to sleep without meds.
  13. Hi everyone. I know this board since a few months. Now I decided to make an account hehe^^ Have HPPD since a year or something like that. Don't know when it started. Came from LSD + MDMA I think, got very worse from cannabis after tripping. Maybe important to say that HPPD developed just on my SECOND acid trip I think. Did LSD just 5 times... Yeah... The drugs that I used in the past two years are: Cannabis, DXM, Speed, MDMA, Alcohol, LSD, DOC, Mushrooms (from often to once in this order) Medication I tried while on HPPD: Fluoxetin, Seroquel, Olanzapine, Risperidone (OMG...! If you wanna trip for free take this shit ), Promethazine, Melperone, Aripiprazole, Tetrazepam, Diazepam, Lorazepam, Clonazepam and now Keppra Yeah. May god bless you. By the way was in psychiatrie a few times this year. First we all thought it is a psychosis... But antipsychotics did not help. After risperidone made my symptoms worse it was clear it is HPPD. Docs in psychiatrie approved it is HPPD. But I am not diagnosed with HPPD because I'm from Germany and here psychiatrists use ICD-10 instead of DSM-IV. Most psychiatrists here of course never heard of HPPD before because it is not described anywhere. I'm glad they googled it^^ They were very interessted in this topic!
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.