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Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) Support Forum


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About khaozet

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  1. Nice to see another med student! Where do you study and what year? I noticed you had made another post on whether starting with meds or not was a good idea. As I understood it, you wanted to try things out after the 12 month mark, however, as you were seeing some improvement, Jay adviced you to see where that goes before trying anything. How come you started?
  2. How long did it take for them to get better? What do you experience? How are your visuals affected by your drinking, both the same night and following days? Dang, the psychological bit sucks. Hope it gets better!
  3. Hey man, Pro tip: start by searching the forums for topics. Pretty sure there are plenty on alcohol, drugs and nicotine. I started a thread not more than one week ago about HPPD and alcohol in the long run. Anyways, the short answer you'd be looking for is that it depends. It's a versatile condition and how you experience it is most likely not how I do. Most people I've listened to have gotten better over the years, however, that strictly applies to those who quit drugs and changed their lives. For the greatest chance of recovery, turn your life around completely. Try to eat healthy, exercise regularly quit all drugs, and do things that you enjoy. Try not to think about it and get on with your life, just as before. I remember being in you exact spot, although 19 years old. I was so afraid of all the things I had read and how it may get worse. I quit reading this forum after a couple of months and didn't look back (until last week - 4 years later). I went on with my life and started studying at uni, as planned. I've learned to live with it and even though it still bothers me to think about it and how it may stick with me for the rest of my life, I will be okey. Jacob
  4. I should probably have clarified that I'm mostly referring to visuals, even tho I'm interested in HPPD + alcohol in all forms.
  5. Supposedly. Even so, I don't want dopamine highs. I want my old way of living back. Maybe I wouldn't even like drinking if I went back to it, but right now I'm ruled by my fright of things getting worse. In the beginning I said to myself that I'd never put myself at risk of that, seeing it is among the worst things in my life. Over the years, however, you start doubting: can it really get worse? Could it really ruin my life? Is it so bad? Then you read up and come back to the conclusion that it could. Still, the massive initial fear have subsided. So you can't get drunk but you drink? How about your visuals?
  6. Takes some strong character to realize that. Good work! Alright, so it went worse? Now, after all this time, can ytou drink without it firing up? I've been sober for 4 years, so I can keep on doing that. It just feels sad sometimes. Most people here have had a lot of drug experience before getting HPPD. Kinda sucks to get it from one thing, and have myself deprived of what was my life, vision and cognition. Would be nice to at least have something.
  7. Okey... But the effect of those two subside? I see, you got problems from the drinking itself? Like an unsustainable situation?
  8. Then what? What if you drink more? Do they get more frequent permanently?
  9. I think I've read about it from time to time. There's been a topic on this forum that includes a poll, to which a lot of people have answered. I should prolly go check that out again. What I was missing from that is people's experiences with HPPD over a long time. My HPPD was caused by the one and only one drug experience, out of alcohol, I ever had - a blotter with a combo of 25I and 25c nBOME. Days after I had a lot of anxiety, due to things happening during the trip, and I noticed floaters. Thought of it quite a lot but accepted it - recalled I read about it somewhere, that you could experience permanent problems. If I remember it correctly, I did drink a bit after that but it was after the festival I came back home and noticed my entire vision had changed. Sad to think of it, as I guess that I could've recovered, but that those days in a not so good environment fucked me over. Really? What amounts and to what extent? Yup, drugs are drugs, regardless of name and common use. My friends are quite supportive and I really don't have that problem. I just find myself missing it sometimes. I can't remember what it feels like but yesterday, for example, I was just sitting at home, doing some work. I started listening to Avicii's new songs and danced in my chair. I felt so happy about the song, but there's a longing for the buzz and rhythm going through my body. That, in turn, made me sad. I can be social and dance without drinking, no problem, but I can only manage the social bit to a certain extent before the drunkedness of people are too overwhelming for my abilities. They're on a different wave length by then, crossing a border I can't get over while sober. How did it make you freak out? You get no effect from it, bad ones especially?
  10. Hello, So I'm back, pretty much 4 years after I ended up with this shit, and found this forum. I decided this was a bad place for me and that it's better to just try and live, which I've managed. Anyhow, there's a reason to why I decided to actually log back on, even tho I've been checking out what you guys been up to every once in a while: so from what I've gathered from a lot of people, including myself, HPPD gets worse with alcohol consumption. I believe I fucked myself over by having mild HPPD and then binge drinking at a festival for 5 days straight, which made the HPPD blossom to its current state, and given that it would probably be a stupid idea to start drinking again. Even so, over time it's getting harder and harder to live life in such a alcohol centered place as university, and not drink. I can live life without it, and I've done it for 4 years - regardless of what friends say, but somewhere deep inside you just wanna be part of the same culture as everybody else. I mean, I've pretty much come to terms with that I will never recover fully, even tho I've learned to manage it, but just being able to take a beer every once in a while would help with a life long coping. So, to the question: is there anybody here who's had HPPD for a longer period of time, had it worse by drinking initially and then kept on drinking without experiencing it getting much worse permanently? Cheerio! If you're new and stuff, feel free to write to me or anything; I'd gladly help you out!
  11. Really? Haven't read about those, although I've seen some odd medications affecting HPPD. Could you link any for me to read? Glad you're okey bud!
  12. I have, and I didn't experience any side effects HPPD wise, as far as I know. Why would it affect your brain?
  13. Yupp, got my HPPD from my first trip ever. One tab, one miligram. Although I didn't take LSD or shrooms, but rather a fucking RC (25I-NBOMe).
  14. I guess I'm doing fine. I've managed to cope with the fact that things will remain like this, maybe for a week of forever - trying to take things slowly and don't worry too much about the future have really helped me. I used to obsess about not being able to perceive reality like I used to before all this. Now, instead, I try to accept the fact that this now is my reality. Psychologically I'm stable, and I rarely feel bad about it anymore, but I do believe my visals are worsening. I hope things will turn around. Except the fact that I don't drink, life is moving on like usual. Haha yeah, it was a really odd feeling! Only happened to me once, though! Sorry to hear about that your drinking made it worse again, you just had it going! Though, I really hope you're right. Sometimes I feel like getting smashed, just to punish my stupid brain for not recovering, haha. However, I'm doing my best to keep my hopes up! I'm from Sweden, what about you? A chat could be nice! Yeah, maybe it's not the best time to bring such a thing up. However, I'm very happy to have such a loving and supporting family - from what I've read many people who try to break the news seem to not be as fortunate. I really hope you will be able to tell your parents as well, and that they will respond in a helping way; having them by your side will make things lots easier. How are you doing?
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