WuWei

Sounds like a detached retina possibly. Go to the doctor!

Thanks for your story- I've been feeling especially disabled lately, after feeling pretty good for a few months. Keep up the good fight! You have a good reason to get out of bed in the morning and do your best now. I can't even imagine caring for a child.

Mine went away. It came on when I was having panic attacks. I think it's mostly linked with anxiety.. at least it was for me.

Been feeling a lot better since the summer- before that it was more of the same. 2017 looks promising (on a personal level- not a global one as Jay said)... just need to stick it out through this god forsaken winter hellscape season to resume my life I wish everyone happiness and happy holidays... we deserve it.

I can tell you my experience from the 3 or 4 years of personal hell with SSRI's I'm just emerging from that serotonin plays a huge role in this, possibly the primary role. Long story short I've been on SSRI's almost my entire life. About 4 years ago my med I was doing well on went generic and my body completely rejected the generic form of the med, then proceeded to reject every other medication I tried, but also wouldn't allow me to get off of them entirely. I finally got the genetic testing for psychotropic meds and got put on a med that was in the "green" category. I've been lowering my dose and have finally stumbled on a tiny (like 1/8 of the lowest "therapeutic" dose) daily dose that's the sweet spot. I feel like my old self of 5+ years ago except better... older, wiser and VERY grateful to god or life or whatever that I was allowed to exit those dark days. The point being... I think anything that effects serotonin effects HPPD- for better or worse. That's all I can say with certainty from my experience. Dopamine is much less a factor for me- as a matter of fact drugs that deal with dopamine like weed or opiates don't seem to have much long term effect on my HPPD. The less GABA you have floating around the more anxious you will be, which also has a big effect on how the HPPD is perceived and how you deal with it. I think this is a biggie for someone just getting used to dealing with it.

I don't know if fish oil aggravates my symptoms- might be something worth experimenting with. I take it later in the day most days anyway. It's crazy good for you in any case, my triglycerides tend to run high and after taking a couple a day they have come down.

I've been taking generic cold-eez to try and knock this cold out and I think I feel worse on it. Definitely wreaks havoc on my digestive system. I would say SSRI's in general make it way worse. As I recall antibiotics do also. Caffeine as well, although I drink green tea in the morning because I feel the benefits offset the negative effects. Too much sleep is worse than too little sleep for me. L-theanine for sleep seems to screw up my neurochemistry as well.

I actually kind of like it when they say that... Lol. But I know what you mean.

Yep... same with me. Mr. mysterious... or "weird in a good way". Yeah a partnership with someone with the same issues would be ideal. As a close second a girl with no major hangups who accepted me the way I was would be nice. Might even be better, as two people with HPPD might overwhelm each other .

I've had quite a few girlfriends in the past (post HPPD), one for over 5 years which ended amicably. She moved out of state and we still had contact and a few visits for a while. I loved her and miss her but neither of us was in a place to keep going with it and she has moved on. Shortly after that I got pretty sick when my SSRI stopped working and have been having a harder time since (about 3 years ago). I did have one short term relationship (about 6 months) but I was pretty fucked up through it and wasn't really interested in the girl. It's really rough... I'm a relationship guy. I like being in them and do better and feel better about myself when I am. I've passed on a few opportunities to date just because I feel like I can't handle it right now. A relationship is one thing I'd like for myself, but I don't feel well enough to pursue one. I will say that the women (I can't call them "girls" anymore I suppose, being 36) I've dated haven't made a big deal about my HPPD. I've always waited a while to tell them and explained it more in terms of "I have this weird neurological disorder" rather than "I did too many drugs and fried my brain", although they definitely had to hear some of that kind of crap later in the relationship when I was down on myself. I agree about the dating service, LOL. My dream is to meet a cute girl with HPPD. Chances are pretty slim I'd imagine.

I empathize with you completely and share your symptoms. I understand exactly what you're saying about everything mentioned in your post. I feel like an idiot pretty much all day to one degree or another. It's hell. Having that experience of clarity and then having it taken away is worse than never having it. Why don't you try and get a klonopin script if helps you? It is very much a sustainable treament option. I've been on it for 15 years and my dose hasn't increased and I'm not addicted to it.

Try some L-Theanine and magnesium. Both over the counter (or the internet)

I'm taking a ridiculously low dose of zoloft... about 25 mg every other day. Sounds weird but I can't handle too much and none at all is also very bad for me... Also klonopin (0.5 or so a day) and vitamins (magnesium and D3 are my most important ones) I had the same problem with the lexapro... got down to a balancing a minute dose. I don't think I really need the antidepressants but without a tiny amount in my bloodstream my brain goes haywire (was taking them pre HPPD).

Zoloft worked briefly for me... I take a tiny dose currently and am looking to switch. I did the genetic site testing and I'm waiting for the results. Lexapro worked really well for me for about 15 years, until the patent ran out and they switched to a generic and my brain went haywire. Switching back to the original formulation did nothing. I've been on Effexor pre-HPPD when I was a kid. I can't remember what it was like other than if worked fast and it helped a little. I would be reluctant to try it even if it comes up as a "green light" for me on my genetic testing- it's notoriously hard to come off of, with some people never being able to do so if they've been on it for a long time. I hear you though, I'd be willing to try anything that improves my cognition, even if my visuals were a little worsened (which I think they are on the Zoloft) Good luck. Keep me posted please! - you don't see a whole lot of people who take SSRI's on here. I personally need them to function, apparently.

Everyone is different, but I'm assuming the OP is taking mag oxide (most commonly available formulation) so that would mean at 600 mg a day they would be absorbing around 24 milligrams of magnesium (4%). Magnesium baths give you magnitudes more magnesium than that... but I would be more inclined to think the sulfur in the epsom salts would be the problem than the actual magnesium, as magnesium is one of the most basic bodily needs. Telling someone not to take a magnesium supplement is like drinking bad water and having an increase in symptoms and then blaming water for making HPPD worse. Just my $0.02... take a good formulation of magnesium... 400mg a day to start. You should be anyway, HPPD or no. It's the most important supplement to take and pretty much the only one you need if you eat a good diet along with D3- leave the mutivitamins and weird jungle herbs and concoctions on the shelf.

Klonopin can help with some of the symptoms and the anxiety associated with them. I personally would be in a world of shit (or even worse than it is now) without it, and most likely wouldn't be able to hold down my job or enjoy much of my days off. It can be habit forming though... be extremely careful. Start out with a low dose and stay there. I take it daily but almost always half a milligram or less a day. I also use it for sleep.

Have you had an MRI? Seen a neurologist? I don't know how you could have that severe of symtoms from using marijuana... I'm not doubting you... just wondering if something else is going on or if the meds you are on are screwing you up... It sounds like it has a strong anxiety component to it if just smelling weed increases your symptoms... ever been on klonopin or the like?

What kind of magnesium are you taking? It should not be mag oxide, as it isn't bioavailable and is basically worthless. I use doctor's best chelated. 400mg a day spaced out is a good starting point, especially as a maintenance dose after deficiency has been addressed (took about a week for me). I've found that, at least for me, much more than that and I start feeling kind of "stoned" throughout the day. It has helped me tremendously, especially my mood. Make sure you're taking D3 with it (everyone on earth should be taking at least 5,000 mg a day unless you work the fields in Africa- it won't hurt you in the slightest). It will also help with your mood and ability to deal with the symptoms. Take a B complex if you smoke/drink and/or don't eat a lot of B vitamin containing foods. I also take fish oil daily. I think addressing magnesium and D3 deficiency will give you the most bang for your buck, as pretty much everyone is deficient in both of these due to soil depletion and staying indoors out of the sun. Other than that get some regular exercise and practice some meditation and you will be getting 99% of what you can get from supplemental/holistic ways of addressing HPPD in my opinion. I would look at mood stabilizers as a last resort treatment for this condition unless you're positive it's not going to heal itself over time, but obviously address this with your doctor and never stop taking these drugs abruptly.

I've thought about this in my own situation should I ever have kids... I think talking to them when they are old enough to understand about the potential risks is key. I wish my dad would have told me about it when I was a kid... in his defense though he got it when he was really young and just attributed it to "too much acid" and just adapted to it. I believe he has mild visual symptoms he's just used to now with no cognitive deficits. I'd give anything for that to be the only thing I have to deal with. Good luck with everything... teach them to be kind to people

My uncle had it for 10 years and my father has had it since he was 14 or so from LSD use. Yeah, I believe it's hereditary.

Invest in a sun lamp... helps me. I've got a Verilux.

It can also be absorbed through the skin... I use the spray in the morning, leave it on for a half hour, they shower it off. There should be little to no laxative effect to using it transdermally unless you have IBS like me (but it's a lot less than taking it by mouth), but it's more expensive and messy.

That's not correct. The various formulations are just different binding agents for the elemental magnesium. Magnesium oxide is not very bioavailable to the body- about 4%. It also has a laxative effect I've heard. The main effect I've noticed with magnesium supplementation has been on my mood. It's a precursor to serotonin so it makes sense.

This disease makes you feel fucked up on and off man. Just accept that and try not to worry about it. It comes and goes.

We give mag citrate at the hospital as a laxative. You might want to look into another formulation (not mag oxide though) unless you have problems with constipation... in that case have at it! I take a glycinate/lycinate chelated one and I do have some GI upset with it some times. It kind of depends on what I eat with it. Taking it on a full stomach helps. I take 200 mg oral and use a magnesium spray or the occasional epsom salt foot soak for the other 200 of the RDA. Eating high magnesium foods will help you get into therapeutic range as well. Take it slow though. High doses seem to give me a derealization effect. It takes about a month depending on how well you eat and other factors to get the magnesium back into the cellular level.