Yeah, for me this is the worst thing about hppd - my symptoms get far worse by meditation - I'm much better if I'm keeping myself occupied/ distracted. Guided meditations are much more effective - even though I've completely lost the power to visualise I can feel the intention working and they will usually help balance my emotions out. Its tricky though when every alternative / energy healer you meet recommends you meditate regularly and can't seem to comprehend how intensely difficult meditation is in this state