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Wizard Eyes


Machine Elf

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Hey guys! Im very happy I found this site, my recent research on HPPD has brought a lot of stuff to light, and its very helpful to hear from all of you. I would like for some to verify what Im experiencing though, Im almost certain it is HPPD, but I cant help but to maintain a doubt.

Also before I go into detail of recent events, I would like to note that I have seen faces and other forms come about in tiled floors, leaves on trees, in wood, and many other things I guess since I was young, and Ive been keenly aware of the excessive amount of floaters Ive had since I was young. I used to attribute it to staring at the sun too long when I was a kid, and after reading some on these forums....might not have been so far off as I originally thought.

Ive also noticed the static for as long as I can remember, its gotten heavier as of recent, in that it has moved out of the darkness and black colors onto just about every surface, no matter how bright the environment.

I believe my symptoms have mostly come about due to my 2C-E use, to a lesser extent past DXM use, and maybe to me smoking weed every day, although given the time lines of these substances, it is pretty clear to me that 2C-E has the strongest causal link to what I experience.

I dont have difficulty distinguishing colors, but I have difficulty distinguishing things within the same color, for example if its has rained and all of the stairs are the same dark damp grey I have difficulty making out the steps. Idk if everyone gets that one though?

My monitor is actually moving right now, its like wherever I look, if my eyes arent constanly moving, it will zoom at me, or away, or flow from its left and right at me, its slow, not like racing at me, just slow flowing distortions. Or like I was in lecture the other day and the sun shined through the window and the whole front wall started to move off to the left, and then the screen on the wall moved similarly but to the right, and they were both slowly zooming in. These are things that I can directly remember experiencing on 2C-E as well, although in my normal life its much more subtle. And I use that word, subtle, but it isnt like these things aren't very noticeable, like im placing their occurrences myself.

I would really like some validation, that this is what I think it is, and that people actually know what Im fucking talking about. Its difficult to relay it to someone who is inexperienced, you just come off as crazy or dysfunctional or something. These things dont really disturb me, and only infrequently will cause me anxiety, but mostly I dont mind and will usually even enjoy them. Though the constant in-my-face-frequency of these things can often be taxing, the floaters are especially aggravating. I would really like to get a break from these wizard eyes every once and a while.

How I feel haha. I would really appreciate it though if you guys could talk to me some and ask some questions, talking usually helps. Im considering talking to a psychiatrist in hopes I can receive some medication that will give me a break from them, but I certainly dont have the money, or the insurance, I would have to go through my parents and such, and there are a lot of stresses coming from there too. Im 18 year old freshman in college, as a bit of a back ground, and smoke small quantities of bud at max twice daily. Would help to know if anyone ever found themselves in a similar spot as I have, and just to know that some one really gets what im talking about. Thanks guys, <3

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