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Is this HPPD?


Georgecarter24

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Hey guys, so the other night before going to bed I notiiced this strange thing where when I started at a dark spot in my room, the entire room began to warp and breathe just like it did when I did 25i NBOMe. I've done 25i four times and LSD once, do you think this is what caused this? 

I deal with absolutely no visual disturbances during the day, nor any when I'm driving at night. I don't really notice it unless I focus really hard in a dark area. 

The thing I am worried about is the possibility that I have HPPD and this is why I cannot succesfully manage and control my anxiety/derealization and depersonalization. I've been getting really bad headaches and heavy brain pressure symptoms as of late and I am wondering if this is connect to my HPPD or the thought process that I ruined my life for doing psychedelic substances.

Also, when I close my eyes, I can see a bunch of miniscule colored dots with a black background, is this common?

I sometimes feel really out of it, but this could also just be attributed to high levels of anxiety over a period of time. I also smoke weed fairly regulary and this doesn't seem to make the symptoms worse. Also, I'm on 200 mg of Zoloft to treat my anxiety/depression. If this is HPPD, I'll highly consider the Keppra medication since it seems to be really effective in treating the symptoms of the disorder.

I'd  love any input you guys have regarding this matter. Much love <3

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If you are forcing yourself to see these things, then I wouldn;t say it is hppd... But maybe what I would describe as pre-hppd.

It's a warning sign from your brain that it's time to stop with the drugs. I had pre-hppd for a year or more and quite liked it... I used to think it was like a free trip, but it certainly has alot more levels to go up... So tread carefully from here.

Personally, i;d give up weed for a while and 100% avoid any harder drugs.

All the best, Jay

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12 hours ago, Jay1 said:

If you are forcing yourself to see these things, then I wouldn;t say it is hppd... But maybe what I would describe as pre-hppd.

It's a warning sign from your brain that it's time to stop with the drugs. I had pre-hppd for a year or more and quite liked it... I used to think it was like a free trip, but it certainly has alot more levels to go up... So tread carefully from here.

Personally, i;d give up weed for a while and 100% avoid any harder drugs.

All the best, Jay

Thanks for your advise Jay.

Is anxiety and depression a result of the disturbance from the visuals themselves? If this is the case, it's not too bad for me because my visuals only appear in super dark environments. 

I'm just really wondering if the anxiety/depression is something out of my control or if it's a reaction to my disorder. Like thinking "I have HPPD, I ruined my life, I'm going to have anxiety and depression that is going to follow me for the rest of my life. This foggy feeling in my head doesn't feel good but I think this is just from excess stress and not HPPD itself. 

What do you think? 

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Just a few words : I have palinopsia (I prefer this term to HPPD for me) because of Zoloft. 

I had severe anxiety wich leads to a depression before that, so I took Zoloft...

This drug will not "treat" your anxiety/depression/whatever it is, it will only alleviate some symptoms, mostly the ones from anxiety. But SSRIs are just completely unneffective concerning symptoms of depression/sadness/empty feeling.

AND it's very bad for your health because it messes up some receptors which can cause HPPD/palinopsia. 

This will not heal you, this will make things worse. And i'm not talking only about visual disturbances. 

For me it's not a reaction to your disorder. It's just you who is scared about that. 

Stop smoking weed. Very bad because it feeds anxiety a lot and unbalances your nervous system. You don't want that. 

You can overcome this with CBT, exercice, relaxation, seeing friends etc. I did it, so everybody can do. All that matters is your will power. You will find strenght deep in yourself and you will overcome it, it will be long and tough, but you will, and you will become a better version of yourself.

 

 

Edited by lysandre
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Yeah im starting to think that antidepressants are to be avoided at all cost with hppd. Even the so called "atypicals".

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11 hours ago, Georgecarter24 said:

Thanks for your advise Jay.

Is anxiety and depression a result of the disturbance from the visuals themselves? If this is the case, it's not too bad for me because my visuals only appear in super dark environments. 

I'm just really wondering if the anxiety/depression is something out of my control or if it's a reaction to my disorder. Like thinking "I have HPPD, I ruined my life, I'm going to have anxiety and depression that is going to follow me for the rest of my life. This foggy feeling in my head doesn't feel good but I think this is just from excess stress and not HPPD itself. 

What do you think? 

No one knows for sure... I think it is all fairly interlinked, but it is also possible to treat the issues separately. I managed to beat my depression after a few years, even though no other disorders have gone away (visuals, dp/dr, anxiety etc)...

As Mythos mentioned, SSRIs can increase other hppd symptoms though, so it is wise to tread carefully with those.

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13 hours ago, TheMythos said:

Yeah im starting to think that antidepressants are to be avoided at all cost with hppd. Even the so called "atypicals".

I don't even think I have HPPD then, I have no crazy visuals, if I look outside it looks perfectly clear. I think I'm juts dealing with an anxiety disorder.

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38 minutes ago, Georgecarter24 said:

I don't even think I have HPPD then, I have no crazy visuals, if I look outside it looks perfectly clear. I think I'm juts dealing with an anxiety disorder.

Everything you described in your initial post is a symptom of anxiety. CEVs are pretty normal for psychedelic users and weed smokers.

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Just now, TheMythos said:

Everything you described in your initial post is a symptom of anxiety. CEVs are pretty normal for psychedelic users and weed smokers.

 Thanks for your input Mythos. I just smoked some weed and looked at the walls and am noticing a bunch of colored sprinkles on the wall, almost static like, the walls are also sort of breathing. When I look at my door hinge and quickly look at the wall, I can see a vague after image cast for half a second. Do you think I should stop smoking weed completely? Or is this not HPPD and just weed related visuals? 

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27 minutes ago, Georgecarter24 said:

Do you think I should stop smoking weed completely?

Yes.

Youre probably in a pre-HPPD state, meaning you have a high propensity for it. I know its hard to quit but you dont want to end up like me where youre seeing shit in your head every day.

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1 minute ago, TheMythos said:

Yes.

Youre probably in a pre-HPPD state, meaning you have a high propensity for it. I know its hard to quit but you dont want to end up like me where youre seeing shit in your head every day.

Will do, thanks bro.

How do you deal with the other symptoms such as anxiety, depression and derealization?

I feel like if I do develop HPPD, this is the part thtat will bother me the most. Is having this a life sentence of anxiety,derealization and depression for the most part? Or are these mental illnesses as a result of how we react to the visuals. Like for example, we see the visuals and we get really anxious because we think we messed up our brains. Is this the case or is the anxiety and depression out of our control?

Would love any input on this 

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