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Showing results for tags 'lack of emotion'.
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I had hppd for the past 3 years, and I'm also Bipolar type II (milder hypomanic episodes). I was on Lamictal for about a year which helped with both, but I somehow stopped taking it this summer. After some life events wrecked me emotionally around september, I had my first manic episode since getting hppd, during which I was dumb and crazy enough to start taking mdma and lsd again. After a couple times of both I realized what I was doing to myself and stopped. Well, it didn't make my hppd much worse, but now I'm dealing with a whole new problem, complete loss of empathy and affection. I have been struggling with emotional situations for the last three months. Mostly, I know how I should be feeling in a situation, or what is the morally right way to act and I try to act that way, but I just don't feel anything about it. Trying to fake it gets very frustrating, and I sometimes find myself getting angry or smiling at the weirdest moments. Like I was at a funeral three days ago, and I was constantly trying not to smile while greeting sad people. Or, my grandma has broken her arm three weeks ago, and I've had no desire to see or call her ever since... I don't want to start avoiding people altogether, but I'm getting tired
