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Everything posted by K.B.Fante

  1. Does anybody else have really bad reactions to caffeine? I know many of us here have hypersensitivity to substances, but for me caffeine is a whole different subject. Even very small amounts of caffeine completely destroy me. And I'm not even talking coffee. In the past I've eaten small amounts of dark chocolate, which has caffeine, but I'm at the point where I'm just gonna totally go without chocolate altogether because of how crazy it makes me feel. For example, I had a small piece of dark chocolate two days ago and I still feel the effects. But it's crazy because it's not just as if my symptoms worsen -- they do, but it's more than that. I sorta feel psychotic, a bit out of control, very unstable mentally, and I absolutely obsess over my symptoms all day long and become melodramatically negative about everything in my life, but especially HPPD. I guess I haven't done other drugs since getting HPPD so I don't know how I would react, but man caffeine really does a number on me.
  2. Man, that sounds rough. I guess we're all in the same boat, but society has always told us weed is safe and it's so painfully clear that's a complete lie. Lots of people with DP-DR report the same sort of story you do. DP-DR often comes with a variety of visual disturbances and some overlap with HPPD. Can you pinpoint exactly which symptoms you have and which are getting worse? That might be a good place to start. Also, you should examine how healthy your diet and lifestyle are and if they're less than superb you should try and help yourself in those respects. I've posted lots of dieting advice recently in case you're interested.
  3. OK, bit of an update: It's been three days now and symptoms have definitely subsided. They're still lingering but it's nothing too bad. I imagine at this rate I'll be clear of exacerbated symptoms in a few more days. As I mentioned above nutmeg contains myristicin which can be found in many foods including many nightshades which I've already touched on in a post here: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5431-nightshades/#comment-34336 At this point I don't think there's even a question -- if you have HPPD you need to stay away from nightshades! These foods clearly contain multiple chemical agents that exacerbate HPPD. If you're someone who eats potatoes, tomatoes, peppers and others spicy foods on a regular basis then these are likely only making your condition worse. Additionally, myristicin can be found in many over-the-counter drugs, including antidepressants and antipsychotics. Here is a full list: http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/812644-clinical#b5 One of the above mentioned medications is an antihistamine called diphenhydramine. Last year when I couldn't sleep I took a few pills of this substance and noticed an immediate worsening of my symptoms the next day. I made a post about that which you can find here: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5091-diphenhydramine/#comment-31926 In fact, if you search this site's database for "diphenhydramine" you'll come up with over 90 results and posts similar to mine wherein people get HPPD from this same drug. Here are a few: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5228-acetycholine-and-hppd/#comment-33200 http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/4581-diphenhydramine/#comment-28376 Myristicin is known to cause what's called anticholinergic toxicity syndrome. This is actually a somewhat common condition wherein people show up to the ER with a variety of symptoms including hypertension, urinary retention, tremors, dry mouth and skin, altered mental status, etc. However, the range of symptoms is quite large and also includes the following, which as some on this site have already noted, overlap with those of HPPD: pupil dilation, light sensitivity (photophobia), blurred vision, double vision, loss of accommodation and inability to focus on nearby objects (cycloplegia), tendency to be easily startled, memory problems, inability to concentrate, disorientation, brain fog, periodic flashes of light, visual snow, tunnel vision, warping or morphing, squiggly lines, patterns on surfaces, etc. Here is a full list: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anticholinergic One thing I've found interesting about neurotransmission when my symptoms have worsened is that it's often due to a lack of a transmitter. In caffeine GABA uptake prevented. In nutmeg and other myristicin it's acetylcholine. And if you go back to the original source, LSD, it's serotonin. In each case, as far as I can tell, there is a prevention of neurotransmission that causes HPPD symptoms to manifest. Would this not then suggest HPPD could be rooted in the brain's inability to absorb and or process certain neurotransmitters? I don't know much about this stuff so perhaps if someone else does they can chime in. Regardless, stay away from those nightshades!
  4. Best thing you can do is seek help, start going to support groups, radically clean up your diet to eliminate excess sugar, stimulants, fast food, etc., and of course try and get some exercise. Nothing ever stays the same and you will get through this, despite how difficult it seems, just as long as you get healthy and work your tail off to get better. I've been there before and I've done it, along with many others. But it's very hard and takes more effort and resiliency than you ever thought possible. Life is worth it in the end. This is just a temporary state.
  5. Here's a brief article on nutmeg that I found very interesting: https://naturespoisons.com/2014/03/20/myristicin-trippin-on-nutmeg/ Lots of overlap with HPPD. One of the quotes in there comes from a guy who basically had HPPD-like symptoms for up to two weeks after taking it, including DP-DR, depth perception issues and morphing. Also, the author speculates it's a 5-HT2A agonist, which again is the suspected culprit from LSD-induced HPPD. Whatever you do people, stay away from nutmeg!
  6. OK, so it's been two days since I ate the Nutmeg and the symptoms are still there. Last night I went to bed at 2 a.m. which I haven't done in over two years. I've sorta felt like I'm on caffeine, my heartbeat has been increased for two days straight and I have a general sense of mental instability and unease. I also have increased snow, trails, afterimages, a sense of detachment from my body and even CEVs which I haven't had since the first few days of my original HPPD. I also have dry mouth and some odd memories that are popping up at random, which sounds like standard symptoms for nutmeg. It's fair to say at this point I'm a bit worried just because I don't think I age that much nutmeg and the symptoms are still hanging around. They have decreased since the first day but not by that much. A quick Google search reveals the psychoactive substance in nutmeg is called myristicin which is the precursor for the synthesis of MDMA. As many of us know that's just about the worst drug you could possible do to get HPPD or exacerbate it. I'll keep trudging forward and hope for this to pass but considering it's been two days and its still very much there and very difficult to ignore I'm just getting concerned. In the past when I've overdose on caffeine the symptoms have decreased much faster and weren't quite as bad psychologically. This state I'm in now almost feels like, once again, a very light acid trip. I've been trying to heal from that state for two years now and was finally at the point where I was pretty good day to day. I've done so much to avoid drugs and anything that could worsen my symptoms, so the fact this happened after putting too much spice on my oatmeal is really discouraging to say the least. Just makes me feel like nothing is safe anymore. I'll keep everyone updated.
  7. http://gizmodo.com/scientists-used-crispr-to-reverse-huntingtons-disease-i-1796262804
  8. Yes, DP-DR are some of my worst symptoms. Getting better though. Also, add to the list nutmeg. It's a psychoactive substance that can even induce hallucinations if taking in large enough quantities. I've had a spice mix that I've been putting in my oatmeal in the morning and finally today put in way too much and felt essentially the same as when I ingest too much caffeine. Not a pleasant experience to say the least. Also, I find it interesting how I always react the same way to stimulants regardless of what they are. For example, I find myself staring in the mirror a lot more, paying way more attention to my symptoms and almost obsessing about them, being overly dramatic and negative, feeling as if the volume has been turned up inside my head and being unable to stop signing songs, etc. Just interesting how the pattern is always the same.
  9. As my symptoms have improved my pupils have decreased drastically. Obviously there's a correlation between HPPD severity and pupil size in my case, and certainly in some others. Your pupils function like the aperture of a camera: when they are open, more light gets let in and the picture is lighter; when they are closed less light gets in and the picture is darker. I'm of the belief that for whatever reason my pupils are letting in too much light and visual stimuli which is causing many HPPD symptoms. There is obviously some sort of sensitivity, but I think it comes back to my eyes allowing too much stimulus into my brain in the first place.
  10. I had crazy anger problems on Lamotrigine. I'd just wanna fight all the time and I've never been that type of person. Have you thought about trying other meds besides Keppra?
  11. Given all the psychological problems you're having it might not be a bad idea to try meds. It's your call though. If you feel unstable, like you might harm yourself or simply can't make it through the day then meds are usually a good idea at that point. They don't "cure" HPPD though so don't get your hopes up. Lots of people have a positive reaction to the ones you've mentioned but sometimes people don't react well at all either. The only way to heal is stay far away from drugs, go stone cold sober and live a healthy lifestyle.
  12. No worries! I knew where you were coming from. I never even thought of the hormones, which might have actually made my hormones messed up even more. All I know is I felt absolutely awful on dairy. As for being a vegan, it's actually pretty crazy how healthy you guys test out. Studies show time and time again that vegans are more healthy across the board than meat eaters. I don't know enough about the science as to why or whether we need meat, but from what I gather vegans tend to be healthier than just about any group around.
  13. I have thyroid issues and dairy is high in iodine so I just started to incorporate it into my diet to get iodine. Nobody really told me I had to. Bad choice obviously. I can't tell you how much better I've felt since getting off it again.
  14. For what it's worth, I contacted the authors of the recent North Carolina study about whether they think HPPD could be a result of a permanent sealing of the lid on the seratonin receptor and one of them said he thinks its highly unlikely. In fact, he specifically said he thinks there's no way it's even possible. Instead, he suggested the visual cortex could have become "sensitized" given our visual disturbances and the fact this area of the brain has a high number of 5-HT2A receptors. He sorta sounded like he was just spitballing, but I guess it's something. Still doesn't tell us much.
  15. I went dairy free for a year then went back on it for about the last four months due to other health issues. I felt like crap on it. I think cheese here or there is OK and doesn't seem to bother me, but milk, yogurt, etc., just made me feel terrible and gave me stomach aches. Not sure exactly why dairy is decreasing in popularity but I know it's high in glutamate which isn't good for our brains either.
  16. This is fascinating. Has anybody here read that book? In the descriptions I've found online he doesn't refer to it as HPPD, only "Post-LSD Syndrome." Also, the symptoms listed aren't in line with what we have. They mention depression, sleeplessness, etc., but no visual disturbances -- at least not in the summaries I read. Also, has anybody tried Ketaserin or Nuplazid? Both seem promising but perhaps difficult to get ahold of. Here's an interesting thread on this subject: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/2294-5-ht2a-antagonists-a-complete-cure-for-hppd/#comment-18303 Lastly, did anybody else have a profound sense of meaning shortly after getting HPPD? I haven't thought much of it until reading all this stuff, but I remember in the first few weeks after getting HPPD having an absolutely revelatory sense of understanding about the world and how life was only worth living when there was meaning involved -- essentially all the stuff you're supposed to have happen while tripping, except this was weeks later. Clearly there was something going on with those same receptors that induce meaning into the world, I just don't know what exactly.
  17. You may want to look into Visual Snow Syndrome and Depersonalization-Derealization. There's lots of overlap with HPPD and if your symptoms came on gradually you could be more so in one of those categories, though it doesn't really matter in the end.
  18. There's a very strong connection between HPPD and anxiety. My actual symptoms themselves haven't really gotten worse because of anxiety but some report the opposite. Best thing you can do is try and tackle your anxiety through therapy, exercise, diet, etc.
  19. Thanks for this. Sounds like it's worth a shot. I hope people give this a try and report back. Would love to hear their experience good or bad. It would probably tell us a lot about what exactly is going on with that receptor, if anything.
  20. You should try and eliminate dairy and gluten too. I'm telling ya, glutamate is a killer. I eliminated it just a few days ago and have felt a world of difference in just that timespan.
  21. I've had problems like this off and on since getting HPPD. It got insanely out of control when my hormones went haywire to the point where I couldn't even hold a conversation or hardly pronounce words, much less read or think properly. It was a horrible adjustment, a complete nightmare on top of HPPD, but it's gotten much better and full health in this regard is right around the corner after a year of complete cognitive dysfunction. Like Onemorestep says, your brain is likely adjusting to something. Just be patient, don't panic and assess yourself a few weeks or months down the line. Repeat over and over and over and you'll be on the way to healing from HPPD entirely.
  22. It's really not that long. The point isn't to eliminate these foods entirely. Many are extremely healthy for you, especially walnuts and bone broth. The point is, rather than having a steak sandwich with tomatoes, cheese and mushrooms for dinner, perhaps consider something a bit more healthy. If you work on this over the course of months and even years it's likely to have a big impact on your condition.
  23. A few weeks back I made a post about nightshades worsening or at least aggravating my HPPD symptoms, which you can find here: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5431-nightshades/ Interestingly enough, after eliminating nightshades for the past few weeks I've felt much better, however yesterday after eating lunch I noticed my symptoms became aggravated in the same way when I consume nightshades, caffeine and other stimulants. When I analyzed what I ate that was different from previous days I realized it was granola I'd recently purchased with a large amount of nuts, but especially sesame seeds which are high in glutamate. In recent months the subject of glutamate has come up in multiple different posts, some of which you can read below: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5399-glutamate-and-some-theory-about-visual-snow/#comment-34148 http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5337-possible-relation-in-paws-and-hppd/#comment-33768 http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5371-negative-reaction-to-caffeine/#comment-33951 http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5336-old-article-about-the-brain-and-lsd/#comment-34024 In addition, several months ago while browsing the Web I came across an interesting connection between glutamate and Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS), which has some overlapping similarities to HPPD. In fact, a user of this site recently complained of symptoms that align with RLS: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5450-hppd-from-weed-alone-rare-experience/#comment-34486 RLS is often treated with drugs that have had similar success in alleviating symptoms of those in the HPPD community, primarily benzodiazepines, dopaminergic agents and opioids. But like HPPD these are no cure for RLS. Also similar to HPPD is the high correlation between emotional stress (especially anxiety) and RLS, as well as certain stimulating agents such as alcohol, caffeine and SSRIs which have a track record of exacerbating RLS symptoms. In recent years RLS has been linked to chromic inflammation, and like many ailments in Western society it appears most of this can be traced back to poor diet. Not surprisingly after drastically altering their diets to eliminate excess added sugar, alcohol, refined carbs, caffeine, dairy, red meat, chicken, potatoes, excess salt, gluten and other glutamate-rich foods many people with RLS have entirely reversed their condition as their bodies have become less inflamed over time. High levels of glutamate are toxic to the brain and are linked to other neurological issues such as migraines (which have an even stronger connection to HPPD and Visual Snow Syndrome), ADHD, obsessive thinking and racing thoughts, Huntington's Disease as well as autism. Foods high in glutamate: Wheat Dairy (including cheese, yogurt, etc.) Eggs Tomatoes Broccoli Nuts and seeds (especially walnuts and sesame seeds) Mushrooms Potatoes Monosodium Glutamate (also known as MSG, often found in asian dishes) Beef Broths Gelatin Hydrolyzed anything Peas Malted anything "Natural Flavors" Soy Anything fermented Molasses Canned foods Pretty much anything in store-bought sauces and cannes such as salad dressings, catsup, BBQ sauce, etc. Here is a more detailed list of foods containing glutamate: http://www.dramyyasko.com/wp-content/files_flutter/1279663001Neuroprovokers8.pdf For those looking to ease HPPD symptoms perhaps a diet low in excess gluten and other glutamate-rich foods, in addition to the many neuro-inflammatory items listed above, is a good place to start.
  24. When I first got HPPD I felt high all the time. Like many have described, it's sorta the same feeling as coming down off getting really stoned. This actually faded pretty fast but DP-DR has persisted. As long as you stay away from drugs it will dissipate in time -- it just might take a few years.
  25. You might not have HPPD as much as you do Visual Snow Syndrome, though they're basically the same with regards to suffering. HPPD implies you got your symptoms from a hallucinogenic drug. Marijuana is a psychoactive substance but not nearly as potent as LSD for example. There's a chance you had underlying symptoms and then the weed brought it out. Others have mentioned their symptoms worsen when they work out as well. We've all been there before man. Nobody deserves this, but you're much better off trying to move forward and do what you can to benefit your health rather than worrying about the past, which you cannot change. Eat healthy, do some light exercises if possible, see a therapist, go to support groups, etc. It sounds like you've had times in your life since smoking when you didn't have these symptoms so you should consider yourself lucky.