Shadowplay

I have all different kind of symtoms. You can read about them in one of my first posts here: Yes, everyone's different but our brains are quite similar in the structures itself, then there are different chemical balances and reactions. However, there is no correlation whatsoever with increased visual disturbances and the use of SSRI:s. SSRI:s have not changed my vision at all and would be an extremly rare side-effect, if even possible at all.

SSRI did have 0 impact on the visuals, but my sleep paralysis is gone. I had major HPPD with all symptoms.

Hi there, I haven't been active here for almost 1,5 year. I had to focus on recovering and there's some negativity in this forum which wasn't good for my mental health. I was so glad that I got help from you guys and girls when I was in the darkest time of my life. I'm better now. Still got it (2,5 years in) but I don't really care about it anymore, even though it's quite loaded. I haven't smoke weed for 3 years. No psychadelics. I've done coke and drinking alcohol without any problems what so ever. Anyways, I've had sleep paralysis since I was 15 and roughly 3 months ago I was having them 5 days a week, several times every night. You can read more about this what is medically referred to as hypnagogic hallucinations. I don't think that there is a correlation between HPPD and the increased rate of sleep paralysis. Since I had it since I was a kid and I'm 25 now. These sleep paralysis session were unbarely to me so I did some research and found about a great study at NCBI which said a man was cured after trying SSRI (Prozac). I was desperate to get rid of it as it was effecting my studies and work. So I went to the doc and as simple as snapping my fingers I got a receipt. It worked straight away. The first night actually. Which is interesting because usually you have to eat those pills for months to achieve an effect. I've never tried it before though. After a month or two with increased anxiety, that side-effect left and I feel just like before right now, except that the sleep paralysis is gone. My main point with this thread is that I would like to cancel all rumours about how SSRI:s has a negativt effect on HPPD. It is simply not true and there's no studies that proves it either. When you start taking SSRI:s your body must adapt to the medicin as it effects serotonin (which is a transmittor that affects a lot of processes, for example, your movement, thinking and your vision). This is why some report that SSRI:s would worsen the symptoms. It is simply not true. Due to this false information on the forum, I didn't use those pills when my HPPD was at its worse and I wanted to kill myself. I stayed sober for 4 months and got out. But it was a really hard time and I had so much support from family, friends and this forum. If that wouldn't been the case, SSRI:s would probably been a good idea for a person in that kind of state. I eat 75mg a day, and I've seen no whatsoever side-effects on my vision. Not even when starting the meds. But if you do, it will pass within the first 2-3 months. And maybe afterwards you will be able to focus more on your life then your vision. Another thing about depersonalization/derealisation is that I had it for roughly 6 months. I couldn't recognize my own face in the mirror. Neither my family or my body. It's gone now. It's not permanent, but a psychological side-effect to HPPD.

No. Just no. I study biology and that's not how it works. If you would like to "rewire" your brain, you can try the old good electro-shocks to your skull. Some psychward-clinics still use that actually. Why you're getting symptom-free is because of that benzos agonize GABA, which will increase the flow of this amino-acid. GABA is what dampens the brain from activity. So at higher doses, it's not just your HPPD that goes away, but your whole mind. You are not functioning at this state and when the drug is out of your system, there will not be any change whatsoever of your HPPD. It might just have increased because of the side-effects of anxiety that comes with larger doses of benzos.

Of course it's fine. But if you have anxiety, maybe it's not a great option. I took a caffeine pill quite late for some reason and had a night of tremor, heartbeat and sweating. Slept for 15 minutes and then went to work. Never again. But coffee works fine. I enjoy green tea too.

I've had sleep paralysis, hypagogia, hypnopompia since I was a teenager, before even using any drug at all. I had a real lucid dream once. And it's a big lie that you are lucid dreaming just because that you are self-aware in a dream. I'm almost always self-aware that I'm dreaming where every scary or intense dream is just like a movie to me. I don't have any bad dreams at all. No nightmares. I enjoy it all. A real lucid dream is something else, this is where you can control everything and when you actually leave your body. You go from a sleep paralysis in your bed, and then leave your intact body and rise from your bed. So it's nothing like a dream at all. However, I do NOT encourage anyone to even try to get into a sleep paralysis, especially not if you already have HPPD or other psychological illness. It can only make things worse and it's not healthy for you. Sleep paralysis is commonly related to bad sleep, stress and alcohol usage and I don't recommend it to anyone.

I didn't know who that guy was in the reflection of the mirror of myself. I couldn't understand who I was when looking on any picture of me taken pre or post-HPPD. I couldn't recognize my family's faces. I saw everyone human being as fierce and dangerous with their worst expressions. I was a floating head on an empty bed every night. I don't have anything of this anymore. It's 100% gone. I don't even think about DP/DR anymore. LethargicAcid linked me this: http://www.psychforums.com/depersonalization/topic80021.html I can't relate more or agree more with this guy or girl. This is kind of how it went for me too except for the religious and spiritual parts as I tend to relate to physics instead. DP/DR is not a part of HPPD. It is, and has been proven, a secondary psychological symtom, which is treatable. I've talked to so many doctors, psychologists and psychiatrist that have cured many sufferers without medication. Keep fighting, talk to people, live your tragic but different life. Accept your pain and let go. This worlds owes us nothing. It's all about what you create.

Welcome to the club, WuWei

I'm drinking a cup of japanese green tea called Drake right now. It's one of the most delicious green teas out there that's 100% pure and contains a high amount of L-theanine. I've been drinking it for over 5 months now, one cup in the morning and one at night. It gives a pleasant effect and it helps a lot. I can't comment on how it does effect the visuals but it has helped me on the psychological illnesses that comes with HPPD such as anxiety, depression and DP/DR. I do not have these problems anymore. And my visuals has been slowly decreasing during this year, either thanks to Keppra or due adaptation or that my HPPD is slowly dying out. When it started I'd say I had all common visuals, as severe as 8/10 scale. Today I'd say I'm down a 30% reduction.

Yes it affects GABA just as alcohol and bensodiazepines, however it reacts so much more differently on your brain then what you feel. It's very easy to overdose as it's difficult to dose it correctly. It contains tons of chemicals that can leave permanently damamges. Between 2005-2010 there was a major abuse of GHB in Sweden where it was quite popular. It killed a lot of young adults. And it's very addictive. I'm not gonna be the one who tells you what to do or what not to do but please take my advice in consideration as I'm not taking things out of air here but I'm relating to the facts that's been proven from using this specific substance. Here's a swedish documentary about the drug and its effects in the southwestern parts of Sweden. You might not understand shit, but please watch some parts and I'm sure that you will get the point. It's a very uncommercial documentary filmed over 3 years and it contains violence, blood, drugs and death.

Great news Matt! Keep us posted. I'm on 1000mg x2 a day as well, and it works fine. Sometimes I have problems with my short term memory but I doubt it has anything to do with Keppra. Since I dont have DP/DR anymore. And I don't care too much about my visuals. I might try to step down from the drug due to some strange thinking patterns. I'm not sure if it's related to the drug but I might give it a shot to go down and see how it would effect me.

If you already got HPPD, why not burn your brain with GHB. Any psychotic drug affects HPPD. (Weed, psychadelics, poison etc).

Great! It seems to help out for some parts. I haven't been cold for over 3 years but my roomie struck me down last week. The brainfog from a simple cold is gone after 1-1,5 hours after ingesting the mushroom. I can't comment visual effects except for that I'm getting more used to it. I got probably 400-500 gram fresh out of this one, and have been making food out of it and eating it raw for over 1,5 week. Still got left for a week.. I will be able to repeat the process 3-5 times and that's nothing for 15 euro+it's superfun to grow When it doesn't grow anymore, I'm probably going to plant the mycel out in a dead forest and hopefully it will expand and take over the whole forest so that I can supply this forum for free Do it and good luck!

No, I'm afraid not. But when I go there, I'll make sure to bring you some spores

Hey, Missjess. I'm sorry but I'm not located in Australia, however I'm positive that if Sweden do offer spores in bags, where the mycel can grow, then Australia should too! Try to find a local company that sell fresh mushroom and ask around, or try to search the web like I did. I'm eating this delicious mushroom everyday now and will start with the 2nd cycle soon. If you don't want to grow it for yourself, you can see if the mushroom actually exists in Australia's forests, as it's not that uncommon but usually sticks to dead trees, and due to the reason that humans these day, do chop all dead trees off, they have now become more rare.

Fuck, what a nasty boss.. Anyone would get messy to get that. Things will be fine, just dont relate your HPPD to everything else. I've seen your work and I know that you got talent. There are plenty of options for you in the future, so just take it day by day and keep on progressing. Keppra and SSRI:s fucks everyone up in the beginning; these are long term medications. And the correlation between serotonin and HPPD is simply but speculations. Healthy but depressed people that use SSRI:s do get visual problems as well during the first 4-8 weeks. That is common. Of course that it will be worse in our case, but eventually it will go back to baseline. There are so many speculations and theories on this forum that it kills the motivation of real progress. Theories are great, but we need to use facts and research not just adding numbers and thinking about it, because the brain is very complex. If a SSRI would reduce your psychological issues and help you with your social life, but you would also have a few side-effects such as weight gain, decreased libido, and more stable emotions. Would that be so bad? Yes, the first months would probably be the worst months in your life, but when you stabilize, it could be great too. But yeah, stick to lamictal now and use it for a long time. I got a friend with partial seizures, which she got from abusing alcohol at a young age, and she's on lamictal and it works good for her. She has 0 side-effects.

I'm sorry if I did step on any toes here. I didn't mean to put it like that. All I'm saying is that we all have our bad times and some people have illnesses and diseases that you just will have to continue to live with. That's the only option. How is lamotrigine working out for you? Maybe I would be in the same hole, looping around, feeling spiky high all the time if it wasn't for Keppra too. But I have been at a psychologist, I've worked very hard with myself to conquer the classic psychological issues that's related to HPPD. I've basicly been to hell and came out of it alive. I was really at the end of my rope, but thanks to the support on this forum and from friends and family I'm now in a better place. Don't care about your future, because it doesn't even exist yet. You live now. Hour per hour. Day per day. And that is how it's going to be until your dead. Face your enemies and try to become friends with them, even how hard it is. We can look for help, and we can get help, to be able to function properly in a society. Every case is unique and I'm really sorry for you Jay as I know that your HPPD is probably the worst on this forum, which I can't relate to by any demands. But I can understand you as good as I can, and it has been proven by Dr. Abraham and other reports that effects such as derealisation, depression and anxiety is not connected to HPPD. It is a secondary symtom of the issues that comes with the visuals, or you had them before too. But then we are not looking to treat HPPD, but other mental illness. What about trying Keppra or a SSRI?

Well, imagine what Stephen Hawking would had answered to that question, when his doctor told him that: "You got 2 years to live, and there is nothing we can do for you" when he was struck of Motor neuron disease. He would said that he wanted to live as long as possible, to get as much work and achievements done through his life. He lived one of the most toughest life on this planet, however he was free of anxiety, depression and managed to achieve some great goals for humanity. It's in your head. Sure, we got an illness and it's fucked up. But it's not THAT bad. And my HPPD is severe. Treat your psychological illnesses, some are difficult. But anxiety is easy to treat. When I say easy I don't mean that you can simply remove it. But with hard work and focus it will dimish on its own and that's fairly easy compared to other challanges. Good luck.

Thanks! I will harvest the first out of 3-5 rounds in a few days and will eat it occassionally during the week. By boiling the mushroom in butter and garlic, it is suppose to taste like lobster. But a vegan alternative that is, which sounds delicious!

Your not suppose to eat bread nor sugar. If you add just a bit of that, it's all ruined because you are suppose to change how your brain breaks down the energy. Not from glucose, sucralose or fructos but from fat; ketos. It takes roughly a week or two to adapt, you should have no side-effects except for tiredness, bad breath, sweating. This should return to normal and you will feel better then ever. Good luck,

Hey, I've been growing Lions Mane (Hericium erinaceus) to really try out it's effects as we don't know what in these capsules and about the dosage or it's purity when it comes to active substances such as: threoitol, D-arabinitol, β-glucan polysaccharides and palmitic acid. Few sources: Compounds: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23735479 Cognitive impairment: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18844328 Depression and anxiety reducing effects: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20834180 Neurogeneration effects: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23510212 Week 1: Week 2: I did cut a hole in different places where a lot of mycel was spread to let the oxygen improve the growth outside of the bag. Week 3, the mushroom is now growing outside of the bag: Week 5: I'll keep you guys posted. Take care,

LCHF does slow down the brain. This is great for both visuals and anxiety. I don't stick to the diet. But when I did, it helped. Today I eat healthy. And just like that is enough and will be enough for me.

Increase dosage to 1500mg a day and use it för atleast 3 months.

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/4304-super-lions-mane/?hl=lion Gonna grow some fresh ones for fun

Oh yeah, were you sober for 15 years without improvement? Damn.. That's rough. I spoke to an epilepsy specialist about these issues and mentioned the top medicines which are: Keppra, Sinemet, Clonazepam and Lamictal. When I mentioned Clonazepam, she said: "So they use it for the anxiolytic effect I suppose"? Because she wasn't convinced about the situation. I simply told her no; it's mainly because of the anti-convulsant effect. It should be possible to research and invent a anti-convulsant such as clonazepam but without the anxiolytic effect. Or an anti-convulsant that mainly effect the visual parts of the brain.