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camilaamilaa

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  1. Hey everybody, I am a newbie on this forum. I suffer from HPPD and I believe it is the direct result of a bad experience I had with cannabis a few years ago. I am writing a paper for a biology class on HPPD, and I want to investigate the relationship between bad trips and the development of HPPD. If anyone could point me in the direction of reliable research on this subject I would really appreciate it! I would also be open to speaking to any doctors or researchers who would not mind being quoted in my paper.
  2. Hi Benny, I'm new on here too but also not new to HPPD. You and I actually have very similar drug histories. I used cannabis when I was a young teenager until I had a horrible experience almost identical to the one you described. I never felt quite the same after that. I tried cannabis again a few times after that experience but always had anxiety and felt I was on the verge of another bad trip. About 4 years ago I started experiencing visual snow and terrible anxiety. I learned how to manage my anxiety, I had no idea I had HPPD, I thought I was just experiencing the beginning stages of schizophrenia. About 2 years ago I started using MDMA and cocaine recreationally. Pretty consistently the last 4 years I have had visual snow. It is the most severe at night or when I look at the sky, white walls, or when I am thinking about it. I stopped all MDMA use about 6 months ago, and all cocaine use about 5 months ago. I did so as an effort to see if my HPPD symptoms might go away, and also because my MDMA experiences were becoming unpleasant. Today, I would say my HPPD symptoms are very under control. I think the best advice I gathered from looking at forums over the years is to avoid thinking about your HPPD and to stop using drugs. I am so hopeful that someday I will be able to look at the stars at night without seeing snow and feeling anxiety. I hope that someday my HPPD will go away entirely and I will finally be able to see through this fog. I hope that this forum becomes more active! For years I thought I was the only person in the world who had ever felt this way. We should find peace in knowing we're not alone.
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