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pyramidic99

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  1. Like you say, there are so many other ways of exploring consciousness and spirituality (meditation, bodywork, connecting with nature, breathwork etc). As you are experiencing such traumatic effects from using LSD maybe a gentler approach may be more suited for you? I developed HPPD symptoms about 16 years ago; I got to a place where I accepted my visuals and had no negative associations or psychological problems; just altered visual processing. I used threshold doses (maybe between 1/8 and 1/4 of 'standard' doses) of psychedelics (mostly San Pedro) for consciousness and spiritual development over a period of several years. My visuals typically increased for a couple of months after each dose and then went back to pretty much baseline. Although after several years there has been a mild/moderate increase of visuals - although at the same time, I get more brief periods of clear vision than ever before. There have been times when my fears about my visuals have resurfaced and I have had to work through them again, but I would not describe this as a relapse. These times have been triggered either by lingering effects of psychedlic use or by spending a lot of time reading and thinking about HPPD. I have recently got into meditating regularly and attending Buddhism classes, and after 5 months of meditating most days I feel I have made more spiritual development than several years of psychedelics, and have decided to let them go. I could never go as deep as I wished with psychedelics as I was concerned about the effect on my vision, and I was aware that I was taking a risk by using them but decided this was an acceptable risk as I was very careful with dosage, set and setting etc and believed I could benefit from the experiences. I am really glad that I have let psychedelics go. I used to think that 'natural' non-drug methods of consciousness altering were second best and less powerful. I have seen now that this is not the case, and have had some amazing experiences from meditating and dancing. Also, I feel these experiences are much more grounded and I have been able to integrate what I have learned into tangible improvements in my life - more confidence, less anxiety, feeling more embodied and less dissociated. My opinion is that spiritual use of psychedelics is most suited to those who are 'hard-headed' and unable to 'break through' out of materialistic ways of thinking, or alternatively people who are extremely grounded and psychologically mature and stable. With any spiritual practise there is an element of losing your way, but with psychedelics this risk is relatively much greater. I have seen that I am much more suited to practises that are more gentle, and that I benefit much more from these kind of practises. I also now realise that these practises are gentle but can be equally powerful as psychedelics; they just work in a different way Reading the problems that you currently experience, I would suggest that you are not in a good place for using psychedelics. Maybe you would benefit more from exploring other practises - especially if you havent tried them before. Whatever you decide I hope it works for you. Peace and Love x
  2. Obviously drug use is a triggering topic for people here but it still pays to be polite - the OP was asking for info, not boasting about drug use etc. I think it is much better to encourage people to ask questions about drug use than for them to just go ahead and take what they want. This is probably the best resource online for people to ask these questions I reckon (/parent mode off)
  3. If you are drinking to blackout once a week, plus drinking on other days too, it sounds to me like you are abusing alcohol pretty seriously and IMO if you continue in this way it will lead to serious physical/mental health issues at some point. I have been there myself; I think it is easy to underestimate the damage alcohol can do as it is legal and socially acceptable.
  4. I think it is a fairly common pattern for people to not have much of a comedown when they first start using MDMA, and for the comedowns to get worse over time. Maybe that is the case here? I think 4 days is a fair recovery time for mixing LSD with MDMA and strenuous exercise, if you were feeling baseline after 4 days then I would say your system is pretty healthy. Of course if you are having negative after effects from using substances it is always good to take an honest look at the situation and see if it is interfering with your life in a negative way, and if changes need to be made.
  5. If it is psychedelics people are missing similar altered states can be achieved by spiritual practices - yoga, meditation, dance, drumming, breathwork etc. It is not going to replace 'gettin fuct and party trippin' but for those who used psychedelics for self exploration it is the real deal. It is not as 'far out' as taking psychedelics but I find it more grounded. Last year I started to go to 5rhythms dance meditation group, once you get the feel for it it is pure ecstasy - energy buzzing up my spine, laughter, tears, connecting with people. For me it is way better than clubbing on MDMA; it's more grounded, no bouncers or people with attutude, is not bad for your body or mind.
  6. <drug geek mode> Actually... Ayahuasca is the name for the vine banisteropsis caapi, and also for the brew containing caapi and usually DMT containing plants. But ayahuasca brews can just contain caapi - I have drunk this many times with very significant effects. I have never personally smoked DMT to compare it with ayahuasca containing DMT; but from online reports it seems that the caapi adds a whole new level of effects, much deeper than simply activating the DMT. I have never been sick from ayahuasca or from san pedro tea - got nausea at times though. I pretty much always do low doses though which may be a factor.
  7. Actually MAOI's massively potentiate tryptamines such as LSD - they don't curb the effects.
  8. Hey Gormeh Sabzi, for me the main issue with the visuals is that they were triggers for all kinds of negative thoughts and feelings; 'ive fucked my brain up with drugs' 'im going crazy' 'im never going to stop tripping' etc etc, which just reinforced my anxiety and negative feelings about myself. Over time I learned to interpret the visuals as just - how I see the world, and not as something that could harm me.
  9. Hi, I no longer consider myself to have HPPD. I have visuals about 95% of the time, at less intensity as when they first occurred 17 years ago - mostly multi coloured visual snow, afterimages, occasional 'breathing walls' - the usual stuff. These cause me virtually no problems at all now, I mostly don't even notice them. The only slight visual complaint I have is that my night vision is rubbish, cuz I see as much of what isn't there as what is there! The main area of my recovery has been dealing with my emotional issues; anxiety and dissociation. In my experience, HPPD is predominantly an emotional/spiritual disorder; and I have become more accepting of myself and put a lot of energy into working through my emotional issues. I think that the LSD experiences that triggered 'HPPD' basically opened up my consciousness to a degree that I was not expecting, I had a huge amount of emotional stuff about myself that I was not ready to deal with and I think that my mind's response was to dissociate and go into a PTSD type state. I think that for me learning to live with HPPD has been basically: 1 - sort out my drug use 2 - learning to accept the visual changes and not be afraid of them 3 - adopting a healthy lifestyle 4- working on my emotional issues. Everyone is different of course, but that has worked for me
  10. I tried reiki for the first time earlier this week. I went out of curiousity really, and because I like the idea of doing reiki shares and wanted to explore this. I found it really relaxing - also a couple of times I clearly experienced 'energy' moving in parts of my body. I felt pretty amazing for the rest of the day, physically and emotionally. I don't have any issues that I derectly associate with HPPD anymore, so I can't comment on that. Unfortunately the therapist was a bit sketchy and tried to use tricksy sales techniques on me to buy more treatments so I won't be returning. I am not sure about finding another therapist - I enjoyed the experience and found it really healing, but right now I am getting into meditation and yoga and like the idea of being in control of my own healing and experience instead of paying someone else for it. It was a really interesting experience though.
  11. Back in my dim and distant past I have experience with (street) amphetamine sulpate. Visual disturbances decreased when the speed was active, and increased drastically during comedowns. Of course that was street stuff and not pharaceutical dexedrine which one would hope would be a little cleaner, but I think the effect was due to the amphetamine itself rather than any impurites.
  12. Some other things I have found useful recently are: -Taking baths with vetiver essential oil - very 'grounding' -Started attending 5rhythms dance meditations www.gabrielleroth.com/.(although I buggered my back up doing this so now instead do... -just dancing to music at home, exploring being 'in' my body -yoga
  13. A lot of anxiety, low self esteem, emotional sensitivity. It is my current theory that the LSD gave me an emotional/spiritual overload, causing anxiety, visual issues and dissociation. I have sorted the anxiety - visual issues have reduced over many years and reduced further now I have stopped using psychedelics again. I am trying to engage with my body and emotions in a full way again after a lifetime of using dissociation, alcohol and other substances to avoid doing this. It is a rocky journey but I am on the right track I do believe that my "HPPD" was basically a drug induced intensification of already existing patterns of behaviour (with additional neon sparkles!)
  14. I have used kava in the past and found it very useful to help insomnia and as an emergency for anxiety. It used to bring me right out of an anxiety attack.I dont use it anymore as it began to make me feel extremely lethargic the day after taking it. It can sometimes take a few tries to get the 'feel' of kava and to perfect the preparation process, so if you don't get ideal results first time stick with it. For best results I would recommend focusing on relaxing activity - chilled music, candles etc. In my experience it works by giving feelings of peacefulness (as well as jsut sedation) so by focusing on these feelings in a meditative way you can get the most out of the experience. Also a minority of people are allergic to kava so take a very small amount at first as an allergy test. I would recommend buying from a site you trust or has a good reputation, as if it is old stock that has been sitting around for ages it will have lost its effectiveness. If you have any more questions feel free to ask or PM
  15. Giving up drink and drugs sounds like a really good move for you. I would recommend just trying to take life as easy as possible for a while, try to avoid stress, relax, exercise, eat healthy and generally be nice to yourself Peace, pyramidic
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