WuWei

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WuWei last won the day on April 15 2016

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  1. Sounds like a detached retina possibly. Go to the doctor!
  2. Thanks for your story- I've been feeling especially disabled lately, after feeling pretty good for a few months. Keep up the good fight! You have a good reason to get out of bed in the morning and do your best now. I can't even imagine caring for a child.
  3. Mine went away. It came on when I was having panic attacks. I think it's mostly linked with anxiety.. at least it was for me.
  4. Been feeling a lot better since the summer- before that it was more of the same. 2017 looks promising (on a personal level- not a global one as Jay said)... just need to stick it out through this god forsaken winter hellscape season to resume my life I wish everyone happiness and happy holidays... we deserve it.
  5. I can tell you my experience from the 3 or 4 years of personal hell with SSRI's I'm just emerging from that serotonin plays a huge role in this, possibly the primary role. Long story short I've been on SSRI's almost my entire life. About 4 years ago my med I was doing well on went generic and my body completely rejected the generic form of the med, then proceeded to reject every other medication I tried, but also wouldn't allow me to get off of them entirely. I finally got the genetic testing for psychotropic meds and got put on a med that was in the "green" category. I've been lowering my dose and have finally stumbled on a tiny (like 1/8 of the lowest "therapeutic" dose) daily dose that's the sweet spot. I feel like my old self of 5+ years ago except better... older, wiser and VERY grateful to god or life or whatever that I was allowed to exit those dark days. The point being... I think anything that effects serotonin effects HPPD- for better or worse. That's all I can say with certainty from my experience. Dopamine is much less a factor for me- as a matter of fact drugs that deal with dopamine like weed or opiates don't seem to have much long term effect on my HPPD. The less GABA you have floating around the more anxious you will be, which also has a big effect on how the HPPD is perceived and how you deal with it. I think this is a biggie for someone just getting used to dealing with it.
  6. I don't know if fish oil aggravates my symptoms- might be something worth experimenting with. I take it later in the day most days anyway. It's crazy good for you in any case, my triglycerides tend to run high and after taking a couple a day they have come down.
  7. I've been taking generic cold-eez to try and knock this cold out and I think I feel worse on it. Definitely wreaks havoc on my digestive system. I would say SSRI's in general make it way worse. As I recall antibiotics do also. Caffeine as well, although I drink green tea in the morning because I feel the benefits offset the negative effects. Too much sleep is worse than too little sleep for me. L-theanine for sleep seems to screw up my neurochemistry as well.
  8. I actually kind of like it when they say that... Lol. But I know what you mean.
  9. Yep... same with me. Mr. mysterious... or "weird in a good way". Yeah a partnership with someone with the same issues would be ideal. As a close second a girl with no major hangups who accepted me the way I was would be nice. Might even be better, as two people with HPPD might overwhelm each other .
  10. I've had quite a few girlfriends in the past (post HPPD), one for over 5 years which ended amicably. She moved out of state and we still had contact and a few visits for a while. I loved her and miss her but neither of us was in a place to keep going with it and she has moved on. Shortly after that I got pretty sick when my SSRI stopped working and have been having a harder time since (about 3 years ago). I did have one short term relationship (about 6 months) but I was pretty fucked up through it and wasn't really interested in the girl. It's really rough... I'm a relationship guy. I like being in them and do better and feel better about myself when I am. I've passed on a few opportunities to date just because I feel like I can't handle it right now. A relationship is one thing I'd like for myself, but I don't feel well enough to pursue one. I will say that the women (I can't call them "girls" anymore I suppose, being 36) I've dated haven't made a big deal about my HPPD. I've always waited a while to tell them and explained it more in terms of "I have this weird neurological disorder" rather than "I did too many drugs and fried my brain", although they definitely had to hear some of that kind of crap later in the relationship when I was down on myself. I agree about the dating service, LOL. My dream is to meet a cute girl with HPPD. Chances are pretty slim I'd imagine.
  11. I empathize with you completely and share your symptoms. I understand exactly what you're saying about everything mentioned in your post. I feel like an idiot pretty much all day to one degree or another. It's hell. Having that experience of clarity and then having it taken away is worse than never having it. Why don't you try and get a klonopin script if helps you? It is very much a sustainable treament option. I've been on it for 15 years and my dose hasn't increased and I'm not addicted to it.
  12. Try some L-Theanine and magnesium. Both over the counter (or the internet)
  13. I'm taking a ridiculously low dose of zoloft... about 25 mg every other day. Sounds weird but I can't handle too much and none at all is also very bad for me... Also klonopin (0.5 or so a day) and vitamins (magnesium and D3 are my most important ones) I had the same problem with the lexapro... got down to a balancing a minute dose. I don't think I really need the antidepressants but without a tiny amount in my bloodstream my brain goes haywire (was taking them pre HPPD).
  14. Zoloft worked briefly for me... I take a tiny dose currently and am looking to switch. I did the genetic site testing and I'm waiting for the results. Lexapro worked really well for me for about 15 years, until the patent ran out and they switched to a generic and my brain went haywire. Switching back to the original formulation did nothing. I've been on Effexor pre-HPPD when I was a kid. I can't remember what it was like other than if worked fast and it helped a little. I would be reluctant to try it even if it comes up as a "green light" for me on my genetic testing- it's notoriously hard to come off of, with some people never being able to do so if they've been on it for a long time. I hear you though, I'd be willing to try anything that improves my cognition, even if my visuals were a little worsened (which I think they are on the Zoloft) Good luck. Keep me posted please! - you don't see a whole lot of people who take SSRI's on here. I personally need them to function, apparently.
  15. Everyone is different, but I'm assuming the OP is taking mag oxide (most commonly available formulation) so that would mean at 600 mg a day they would be absorbing around 24 milligrams of magnesium (4%). Magnesium baths give you magnitudes more magnesium than that... but I would be more inclined to think the sulfur in the epsom salts would be the problem than the actual magnesium, as magnesium is one of the most basic bodily needs. Telling someone not to take a magnesium supplement is like drinking bad water and having an increase in symptoms and then blaming water for making HPPD worse. Just my $0.02... take a good formulation of magnesium... 400mg a day to start. You should be anyway, HPPD or no. It's the most important supplement to take and pretty much the only one you need if you eat a good diet along with D3- leave the mutivitamins and weird jungle herbs and concoctions on the shelf.