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@Jay1 ok thanks for the advice. I've decided I'm giving myself 5 months of eating healthy, and meditation( never thought I would meditate) before I start any sort of drug to help. I have faith that time will make me better. I think my body was used to being stoned all day now it's not used to being sober. Thanks for all the help and I will send you a gift when I get cured. My parents said they give up on my health because I won't start meds. But I know deep down I'll get better over time. And I've accepted vs I'm trying my hardest to make myself like it as weird as that sounds lol it makes the sky look crazy @Jay1