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  1. 4 points
    Hello, I'm recovered for 90-95% of this illness, I've suffered with HPPD for a period of 5-6 years . The only thing I suffer from now is chaotic thinking. A good night sleep makes this symptom relative obsolete though. So what did I do, right? HPPD really started to fade when I stopped all the drugs. This includes even smoking and probally drinking coffee. And to eat healthy, and to sport frequently. I think sporting as much as possible is even better. Also thinking postive is important too, try to go on with your life. Try to hit the hard but "good-for-u" roads frequently. What I also personally came across, that the cause of increased anxiety is not related to HPPD. HPPD only makes anxiety worse. Before HPPD kicked in I already had semi social anxiety. Focusing on such pre-existing anxieties is much better then on:"anxiety is from HPPD". A extra tip: I know it's really hard to step out your friend group. I think most friend groups who uses drugs frequently posses this strong loyal or tight band thingies. Specially when you're young, this youth culture kinda is your entire world. I think I'm lucky I converted to christianity in that period of time. I want to say some things about stepping out of such groups. I'm now in my 20's, and now with a more mature mind. I'm really thankfull I'm not in that place anymore. To be frank, I'm attending a good education and hang arround with the good people(I also used to hang arround plain thugs/hoodlums). I know almost certain, If I've stayed in this group I still have HPPD; and I'd be still in that dark corner of society. Some health boosts: I was quite desperate in the times of suffering of HPPD. So I played a bit with anti-oxidants. I discovered that some anti-oxidants helped with HPPD. Which are: L-carnosine, r-fraction alpa lipoic acid and astaxanthine. This above anti-oxidants has the rare behaviour that it acces the brain. Anti-oxidants, simply said, cleans the body of "waste/dump". If you're non-functional withouth coffee, you could try as substitute: Acetyl L-carnitine. It's a natural energizer. If you're having a hard time to stop smoking, ask your doctor if he/she can prescribe champix. Ps: sorry for my spelling & grammar, I'm dutch.
  2. 4 points
    I took LSD, Extacy and Mushrooms in relative moderation for about four years and I have spent the last 10 years of my life dealing with HPPD. The one good thing that came out of it, of course, is the fact that I was too scared to ever touch drugs again. I can honestly say that after all this time I hardly notice it any more but that is not to say that I did not at one point think that I was going to end up in some kind of institution. I have accepted the fact that it will never leave me completely but at the same time I have managed to let it go!!!
  3. 3 points
    I feel like the symptoms of anxiety,depression,derealization and depersonalization are a matter of us dealing with our condition and how we respond to it and the emotions we attach to it. Honestly, I feel like the best way to get better from HPPD is to accept the fact that yes you may have visuals but this is NOT the end of the world. You have to do things like meditation, wim hof breathing, weight lift, exercise. If you continue to believe that you're going to have anxiety and depression for the rest of your life due to a past decision, you have to ABSOLUTELY get over this destructive thought pattern. Guys, the mind is an extremely powerful thing. We can either use it as a tool for our own advantage or as a means of self destruction. STOP the negative thought patterns, eliminate the cortisol rush's from anxiety and take control of your life! Never feel sorry for yourself and never ever go into the bitter regretful mindset. This will just absolutely lead you down a dark path. Cheers, hope everyone gets better.
  4. 3 points
    I've had mild hppd because of SSRI and used to smoke weed for 15 years before, I recovered in 10 months at 90-95 %. But I relapsed on caffeine and afterimages, trails and general vision are worse than the first time now. But I will recover again.
  5. 2 points
    I know how it is man. We all have vices. Mine is sugar and sweets. I still struggle with that stuff daily. Again, it's all about making little achievements and goals here or there, baby steps, taking it one day at a time, etc. Like MadDoc said, focus on the progress you have made, be proud of yourself, but at the same time always have goals you're trying to work toward too.
  6. 2 points
  7. 2 points
    http://time.com/4841790/exercise-brain/?utm_campaign=time&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social&xid=time_socialflow_twitter
  8. 2 points
    I really think everyone on this site, especially those with anxiety problems, should definitely consider this. All the science is pointing towards writing as an excellent way to help process trauma and it sounds like this could be one of the ways to follow through with this concept. Also, Jordan Peterson is just about one of the smartest dudes on the planet so I don't think you could go wrong. Thanks for posting this.
  9. 2 points
    I'm unfortunately only new to this entire experience, having been experiencing after-images for about three months now. Prior to this, I'd been depressed over other vision problems cause by laser eye surgery (don't ever get it done by the way - the risks are not worth it). For me, as I had been trying to sort out my life after the laser, I had already developed some support mechanisms for my problematic vision. It was just a stroke of misfortune that brought me more visual problems - the snakes in life are always around, no matter how many you kill. Luckily, the support mechanisms I had been developing for my problematic eyesight already existed. Some of these have been helpful in dealing with my new HPPD-related vision problems: Psychotherapy. My psychologist is great - she has a great understanding of the theory in her field and applies it magnificently. She is also very smart and understanding, often putting pieces together that I would never have been able to arrange. Psychiatry. I'm not sure if this has helped or not, but I've been on Lexapro for six months. I'm wondering whether this could have contributed to the development of my HPPD, but for now my medications are at least available to help lighten the load of negative emotion. Mindfulness Meditation. I was told by another psychiatrist to start looking into this, and it's been one of the most important changes I've made in my life. It has helped reduce my anxiety - even more than CBT did. I would recommend that you give this a try using the Headspace app to encourage daily practice and for an accessible introduction to the practice. Journaling. I've recently begun doing this and have enjoyed it immensely. Journaling has been around for centuries, and it's no wonder - it helps you articulate and better understand your thoughts and feelings. Give it a try - buy yourself a nice book to write in, and set aside 10-15 mins each night to just write about your day. Don't hold back, and don't write for anybody other than yourself. There is no right and wrong, just write without editing. It's a very liberating feeling. These are some of my strategies so far. I hope they can be of some use to anyone else here. Facing the struggles of life doesn't necessarily mean getting rid of them, it means getting stronger so that you can tolerate them. Remember that each day you make it through is another victory for you to be proud of.
  10. 2 points
    Great advice. I know months can feel like decades in that early stage. I vividly remember it myself... But it is essential to give yourself the best possible chance to recover... Try and remove as much stress from your life as possible. If you need to take time off, do it... If you need to lock yourself in your room, do it... Whatever helps with stress... You can quickly get your life back on track once you recover or learn to deal with this. I would also add that self blame/self loathing is great fuel for stress and anxiety. If at all possible, forgive yourself for taking risks with drugs and realise that no amount of wishing you hadn't done something will ever make it so... It's wasted energy and added stress, so just forgive yourself for doing something that millions of others do, learn and move on. (easy said than done, i know!).
  11. 2 points
    Hi Alex. I have what you describe when you look at carpets. With me it happens when I look at anything with a fine grain (sand, cement, textured ceilings, etc.). I used to have intense CEVs which have cleared up but it took a long time. Note, I dosed hundreds of times so it's not a surprise. I'm not familiar with the chemical you've ingested but I'm assuming it's a psychedelic. Your symptoms sure sound like hppd to me. However, I'm not a doctor or an expert on the topic. I've just had it for a long time. You're doing the right thing by refraining from psychoactive substances. Because you've only dosed a few times I think you have a better chance at recovering. You're also taking care of your body which, for me, helped a lot. Also, the fact that the symptoms fade at times sounds like an excellent sign. My visuals are constant unless I'm focused on something like driving, work, or a hobby where I use my hands. Above all, don't despair! Even if your symptoms don't entirely go away you can live a wonderful and productive life. Hang in there.
  12. 2 points
    yeah dude, try and hear me as rationally as you can. If you are only a couple months in, this is the WORST PART OF HPPD. IT WILL START TO GET BETTER. But it happens slowly. You can't give up hope, read what we say and try to realize when you keep asking the same questions. You probably feel unstable and, frankly, untrusting of what we say just because what you're experiencing right now is so intense and shitty. You'd do anything for a quick fix, but that just isn't how it works. Anxiety and depression runs in my family, and I have no doubt it made coping with my hppd more difficult. One thing I did to help (this was before I knew I even had hppd) was see a psychologist. They can't cure the hppd, but they can help you to recognize when you are anxious and how to deal with it. You'd think this would be obvious, but its not. Anxiety has physical manifestations, and that makes everything worse when you don't realize it. EDIT: I was also able to confront and deal with shitty things from my childhood, things that still affect you to this day unless dealt with. As hard as it is to hear this, I'm gonna say what everyone else has said. You need to chill out, breath, and ride this through. Look at your previous posts. Besides the fact that you seem to ignore most of what people say to you (they are speaking the truth), your posts are otherwise totally coherent. You can still function, you are not crazy, you are still the same person. This is a rough patch that you need to get through, and that no medication will heal. If you find a med that helps you out a bit, fine, but to truly cure yourself to the highest potential is a mental exercise. I have faith that you will. Don't expect it, try and forget about it. Also, remember your worst days, and compare your current one to the worst one. If its better, you're on the right track.
  13. 1 point
    The advice I give everyone is stop taking drugs ... at least for a while. See if the symptoms moderate. For me, weed really makes my visuals intolerable so I don't touch it. Every once in a great while I give it a try and it's never pleasant. You did one dose of LSA or did you do other hallucinogenic substances as well? If you've only dosed once you may have a good chance of having your symptoms clear up but it might take a while. If you're having issues with anxiety, I can't recommend mindful meditation enough. Good medicine. I don't take any prescription medication so I can't comment on that. Hang in there!
  14. 1 point
    Quit all drug use anyway. It's for the best.
  15. 1 point
    You're doing great! Don't forget to give yourself credit for the progress you've made. Smoking is one of the hardest things to give up. Nicotine is an insidious chemical. Nicotine replacement seems to work for many. Gum, lozenges, patches, etc. Just a thought. I quit cold turkey about 30 years ago after my first kid was born. Almost lost my mind for a few weeks but in the long haul it's nice not to be under its control.
  16. 1 point
    If there's one thing I've learned about HPPD it's that progress is a lot like watching the moon go across the sky at night. You can't see it move no matter how hard you try, but if you glance up every now and then you'll noticed it's not in the same spot as before. Any progress is good with HPPD. It's really about entirely altering your lifestyle, becoming the healthiest person you can imagine and doing a whole bunch of little things each and every day to benefit your health and transform your mind, body and especially your brain. If you keep working at it, then over the course of hundreds and hundreds of days you'll notice a change. It's great you've made the progress you have, but man, smoking is just awful for you. If you could really cut back and then totally eliminate cigarettes and all forms of drugs I really think you'd notice a big difference in your mental and physical health. I know I did when I quit about three years ago. Also, eating healthy is the single most important aspect of altering your brain chemistry. I think I read somewhere recently that 90 percent of neurotransmitters begin their life cycle in the gut. You can't change your brain if you're not giving your body what it needs to work. It's like filling a sports car up with the cheapest form of gasoline -- it'll run, sure, but your not optimizing your output and in the longrun you could totally mess up your engine altogether.
  17. 1 point
    I guess I'm lucky in one respect. The DP/DR was short lived. Well .. I still get moments but they're just moments that last no more than a minute or so. I think it's neurological. It comes out of nowhere. It's certainly not caused by attitude. The visuals on the other hand can wear me down if I let them. In the original post I liked the message that visuals are not the end of the world. They're not. They don't even exist. Just neuro chemicals playing in my coconut.
  18. 1 point
    I'm kind of torn on this... I agree that a positive mindset is very helpful, and self blame/ self loathing are useless.... But I completely disagree that dp/dr and anxiety are emotional responses and not, at least in some part, neurological. I couldn't care less about my visuals anymore, but dp/dr is hell on earth and no amount of positivity and peace can stop it from being there. It's almost like a physical pain.
  19. 1 point
    The fact that some people are talking about they can't handle this disorder anymore and it is out of their control. People are talking about how their anxiety has been limiting their life and they can't drive etc. This stuff is going to be ingrained into my subconscious mind and slowly will become my reality. If you perceive something in one manner for a prolonged period of time then that's going to become your reality. Honestly, the best advice would be to stay away from these forums and reading up on anything HPPD related. It's as if you have a really awful itch and you keep on itching and itching, giving you temporary relief which ultimately results in the itch becoming worse. We have to distance ourselves from depression and anxiety. We can not let this disorder dominate our lives. We only have one life.
  20. 1 point
    I went through a period of extended sleeplessness for about three months last year as a result of benzo withdrawal, HPPD and other life circumstances that was unlike anything I've ever experienced. Towards the end when I was literally falling asleep talking to people in the daytime I remember I could almost feel the exact place in my brain where something was going very wrong. It's crazy looking back now because that seemed like so long ago, but it really wasn't and I too had endless days where I thought there was no way I could go on and that ending my life was the only solution. It never is though, and life always goes on, always changes, always gets better and so on. You have to remember that this is only a period of your life, not you're entire life. Sometimes life doesn't go your way -- and I think all of us here understand that better than anyone -- but it's still life and it can still be glorious if you put the work into turning your life around. If you make the commitment to living healthy, to getting better and to getting back up every time you've been knocked down even if you've been knocked down a million times already, you'll get there one day. I really believe this from the bottom of my heart. Some people just have to fight a lot harder than others to get there.
  21. 1 point
  22. 1 point
    I don't know where you came up with this idea it's a "life sentence." There are recovery stories up and down this forum. It's a well known fact people recovery from HPPD all the time. Get a therapist, exercise, eat healthy and give yourself some time. You'll be OK eventually.
  23. 1 point
    Almost certain.... Not certain. The reason I think you will recover is that your symptoms are very mild and, in 10+ years here, I have never seen someone with mild symptoms stay more than a year. They either fully recover or start to ignore the symptoms and carry on with their life as normal.
  24. 1 point
    http://gizmodo.com/scientists-used-crispr-to-reverse-huntingtons-disease-i-1796262804
  25. 1 point
    An alternative to look into is inositol. It noticeably boosted my mood with no effects on hppd. Everyone is different, so gradually increase dosing, if you do try it.
  26. 1 point
    Interesting. I know Keppra suppresses the immune system. Perhaps this is one of the reasons it helps. I know drugs that raise acetylcholine have really screwed me over in the past too.
  27. 1 point
    Prozac made my visuals worse, but made my anxiety spike to levels i've never know before or since. I'd rather take acid again than that poison.
  28. 1 point
    Yes it will moslty go away. At least, it will fade in the background. You will not notice it anymore. Give it at least 1 year. It can flares-up because of stress, fatigue, or no obvious reason. Stop taking drugs, alcohol, caffeine. Stop obsessing about it, don't focus on it, don't search mindlessly on the net about it. You have to forget it as much as you can. Eat well (not too much sugar), sleep well, and exercice. Just live your life, enjoy the things you like, and strongly believe that you will recover, because you will
  29. 1 point
    Seems there's been an uptick in posts where users wonder whether they have HPPD, which I've always found a bit strange considering I knew I had HPPD the minute I read the symptoms list. If you take drugs and end up with HPPD symptoms then you have HPPD. I think it would be helpful to have an introductory post stating something along these lines, perhaps listing symptoms, what steps to take, what to do, what not to do, etc. I can even make one of these if someone wants to pin it. I just think there needs to be some general outline of what this condition is and what to do about it so people don't come here so lost. Just a thought.
  30. 1 point
    I quit drinking alcohol for 7-8 months, I didn't smoke weed anymore at that time, lost interest in it at the beginning of depression four months before my onset. That was for the better ! I exercice regularly, and tried to sleep enough. And tried to be positive as much as I could, focusing on my general well being, do stuff I like etc. All the things I read here, and I would like to thank you Jay, you gave me some support and advice and other people too, like Visuals and K.B Fante. I was completely lost and you guys were here. Didn't change my diet so much. I didn't take any meds or supplements (was afraid of making it worse), although I was on Lorazepam before HPPD and started tapering off four months after my onset. My general anxiety disorder was getting better (thanks to therapy, relaxation, exercice) and I didn't need it anymore at this point, not because of less visuals symptoms, which remained steady for at least 6 months, and flared up regularly.
  31. 1 point
    Gonna comment on this now, 2-3 weeks in on hppd, you've read my story jay so you know what happened. My symptoms are slight, and if my hppd subsides within 3 months time i'll be sure to let you know the journey.
  32. 1 point
    Those are called flare ups. I remember times years ago my vision would get wonky for a day or two and then go back to normal. You just gotta ride it out and try not to obsess on it.
  33. 1 point
    Yeah, you definitely have DP-DR. Numb is a great movie. If you're into reading there's some good books on it. I think Feeling Unreal is probably the most famous. Also, there's speculation that a lot of philosophers had DP-related experiences so you could start with Descartes if you really wanna go down the rabbit hole! Diet has been the single most important factor of my recovery so I'm always going to try and promote a healthier lifestyle, but I realize some people may not respond in the same way as others. I guess all you can do is just try and be healthy and happy and do everything you can to get better. If you have to, there are certainly medications you can explore but they probably shouldn't be your first course of action. I'd really suggest cutting back on added sugar, gluten, junk food, etc., and see how you feel a few months from now. If you notice a change, even a very slight one, then keep on going. If not, well at least your doing your body a favor!
  34. 1 point
    This is mainly to the newcomers like myself. For those of you just entering your days of hppd, take it from someone who also hasnt had it for very long, ive only had it for 3 months. The first month to months could very well be a hellish ride straight to satans throne. But one thing id tell you is to not lose hope, insert yourself into discussions with friends and on forums(not just about hppd but anything) take some recommended vitamins like vitamin d3 and b complex and magnesium, get a therapist you can talk to and stay active, all these things will help you get better. While my visual symptoms have not subsided, my physical symptoms on the other hand have. Ive always had social anxiety tho, so for the most part i would say i definitely feel like myself again. I attempted suicide in my first month and its now my third month and im so glad i never did. If theres three things of most importance i could tell you to do 1. Acceptance(accept this is your life as of right now, you cant dwell on the fact you MIGHT have this for the rest of your life because you also MIGHT NOT. My girlfriend told me i just need to take it one day at a time, we live day by day not month by month or day by month, you dont know if youll have this tomorrow or a month from now or a year, which leads to my second) 2. Never give up hope (Accepting that you have it in my opinion is a great step to recovery. But also being hopeful in the possibility of recovery is very important) Acceptance and being positive/hopeful are two great things to feel towards hppd. Its at that point imo you can feel true improvement and recovery. 3. CEASE ALL DRUGS. I cant stress that one enough, let your brain rest. Those in my opinion are the three best things to do when faced with hppd. Granted i may have it milder than a lot of hppders but i do want you guys to know i havent smoked or dosed since the onset, i drank maybe 3 or 4 times(avoid that too if you can) i also have a foot injury right now but most of my improvement came when i was going to the gym and running and sweating like a dog. Hppd isnt the end, but in a lot of ways its an eye opener.
  35. 1 point
    Excellent post. Couldn't agree more with items 1-3. Jay's point regarding self blame is excellent as well. One thing, even if you're symptoms don't seem bad at first and your life isn't hell, proceed with caution. When I stopped using I was kind of stumbling out of a long term psychedelic stupor. The symptoms (visuals) I had were initially kind of reassuring. It wasn't until the years started to go by that I realized it wasn't going away. Sobriety at the first sign, good or bad is important IMHO.
  36. 1 point
    Man, that sounds rough. I guess we're all in the same boat, but society has always told us weed is safe and it's so painfully clear that's a complete lie. Lots of people with DP-DR report the same sort of story you do. DP-DR often comes with a variety of visual disturbances and some overlap with HPPD. Can you pinpoint exactly which symptoms you have and which are getting worse? That might be a good place to start. Also, you should examine how healthy your diet and lifestyle are and if they're less than superb you should try and help yourself in those respects. I've posted lots of dieting advice recently in case you're interested.
  37. 1 point
    OK, bit of an update: It's been three days now and symptoms have definitely subsided. They're still lingering but it's nothing too bad. I imagine at this rate I'll be clear of exacerbated symptoms in a few more days. As I mentioned above nutmeg contains myristicin which can be found in many foods including many nightshades which I've already touched on in a post here: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5431-nightshades/#comment-34336 At this point I don't think there's even a question -- if you have HPPD you need to stay away from nightshades! These foods clearly contain multiple chemical agents that exacerbate HPPD. If you're someone who eats potatoes, tomatoes, peppers and others spicy foods on a regular basis then these are likely only making your condition worse. Additionally, myristicin can be found in many over-the-counter drugs, including antidepressants and antipsychotics. Here is a full list: http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/812644-clinical#b5 One of the above mentioned medications is an antihistamine called diphenhydramine. Last year when I couldn't sleep I took a few pills of this substance and noticed an immediate worsening of my symptoms the next day. I made a post about that which you can find here: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5091-diphenhydramine/#comment-31926 In fact, if you search this site's database for "diphenhydramine" you'll come up with over 90 results and posts similar to mine wherein people get HPPD from this same drug. Here are a few: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/5228-acetycholine-and-hppd/#comment-33200 http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/4581-diphenhydramine/#comment-28376 Myristicin is known to cause what's called anticholinergic toxicity syndrome. This is actually a somewhat common condition wherein people show up to the ER with a variety of symptoms including hypertension, urinary retention, tremors, dry mouth and skin, altered mental status, etc. However, the range of symptoms is quite large and also includes the following, which as some on this site have already noted, overlap with those of HPPD: pupil dilation, light sensitivity (photophobia), blurred vision, double vision, loss of accommodation and inability to focus on nearby objects (cycloplegia), tendency to be easily startled, memory problems, inability to concentrate, disorientation, brain fog, periodic flashes of light, visual snow, tunnel vision, warping or morphing, squiggly lines, patterns on surfaces, etc. Here is a full list: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anticholinergic One thing I've found interesting about neurotransmission when my symptoms have worsened is that it's often due to a lack of a transmitter. In caffeine GABA uptake prevented. In nutmeg and other myristicin it's acetylcholine. And if you go back to the original source, LSD, it's serotonin. In each case, as far as I can tell, there is a prevention of neurotransmission that causes HPPD symptoms to manifest. Would this not then suggest HPPD could be rooted in the brain's inability to absorb and or process certain neurotransmitters? I don't know much about this stuff so perhaps if someone else does they can chime in. Regardless, stay away from those nightshades!
  38. 1 point
    If your only hope for getting rid of hppd is to start smoking and drinking again, youre gonna recover and be back in no time. Your best bet is to stay away from psychoactive substances.
  39. 1 point
    Whats happening is that multiple afflictions are happening at once. The OCD is feeding the anxiety which is feeding the HPPD and dpdr. As a fellow sufferer of ocd you need to try whatever you can to get a grip on the illness. You are not going insane. This is not going to last forever. It will pass and you will be able to move on with life. Every time an objection or counter argument comes up, politely accept the thought as being there and tell yourself that youre recovering and recovery takes time and that you will get better.
  40. 1 point
    Try to relax. If possible. Now is the time to go with the flow. Or else you will latch onto a distraction that you will become obsessed with. Turn to cognition therapy (websites that will help with that). Also study. Even if you study like shit. Eventually you will realize 'shit, I know more about ____ subject than I had'. It's not easy but at least you can work on some things, and you can learn more... (maybe you don't retain them the same way or are distracted or anxious but you WILL retain some knowledge). Give it a try!
  41. 1 point
    Loads of people recover, they just leave without saying anything... I'd say at least 70% recover. 3 months is not much time at all. 1 second after images are not too long, i have them for at least 5 seconds on certain objects, and if i look at a light for even a millisecond, i see an after image for at least 30 seconds. floaters are nothing abnormal at all, you are just noticing them because you are searching your vision. VS is often connected to hppd though. So it is possible you have some form of hppd. Try removing caffeine, at least to test if it helps... Most hppd sufferers cannot tolerate it. Try to keep calm and avoid stress.... Thinking that this is something you are now stuck with for life is not helping and is unlikely too... and even if you are one of the unlucky few, you will find coping mechanisms and will find a way to go on.
  42. 1 point
    Damn dude, sorry it didn't work out, quick
  43. 1 point
    Hi, I'm new to this forum and have only spent a couple of hours reading through it. I have had mental health problems as long as I remember but it has never been diagnosed. So it's not definite but the family doctor, past psychiatrists, and my school nurse have all thought that I suffer from anxiety and depression, and I believe so too. all of my symptoms make me feel ver depressed and anxious, and like my life is hopeless and I can't live like everyone else. i have used 25i-nbome twice, the first time was fine but the second time I had a very bad trip and I believed that I was dead. its been almost 3 months now and I've been experiencing what seems to be symptoms of hppd. My symptoms are: In dark rooms or when my eyes are closed I see blue or red fractals at the centre of my vision, and I'm mildly lit rooms they travel over the walls, Long lasting after images from bright objects, the worst symptom is that whenever I look at carpets and sometimes other objects they seem to grow this psychedelic pattern into them, seeing this really scares me. I avoid it by not looking at the floor basically but if I do then it will make me really anxious and more prone to my symptoms for the rest of the day. Does anybody else see this? Because I've only ever read about one other person having it. i see slight red lines over my keyboard on my phone screen On plain walls I also see what seems to be like mild static. when I am hungover I also have strong CEV's that basically take me back to the night before or I see a distant screen that shows what seems to be videos of me I still have hope for this going away as a lot of the symptoms are only really there when I think about them. So I was wondering if others think this seems hopeful or not? the fear of my symptoms never going away also scares me a lot and makes things a lot worse. i am basically sober now, I don't even drink caffeine, but I do occasionally drink alcohol which I am trying to stop. I am on a diet and I go to the gym for a couple of hours daily. i can have episodes where I feel a lot better and that it is going to go away, and I can sometimes have whole days when I don't think I see any visual disturbances, but small things like my mood being changed can bring it on again where I feel worried about the hallucinations all the time. i am only 17 so I don't have access to any medication to help yet and it takes a long time to go through the children's mental health service. i was wondering if people think my hppd will fade eventually, and if there is anything else I can do to further my recovery. please don't give comments that are negative or make me feel like I will never be cured because it makes things a lot worse for myself. thank you for any responses given!
  44. 1 point
    Just meditate and exercise everyday, and keep yourself busy. These things are basic, and they'll reduce all your symptoms. Maybe fish oil and vitamin b complex will help too. There will be bad and depressive days, but keep yourself distracted and try not to think about it. I've realised keeping myself busy has helped me the most. It's somewhat like a break up, man. The less you think think of it, the faster you can 'get over' it and realise life can still be good.
  45. 1 point
    OK FIRST OFF! I'm sorry this happened to you. A lot of us have these "Halos" and anxiety caused by psychedelics and MDMA. First OFF I hope your have to realize you are done with these drugs. I'm sorry but doing it again can make things a lot worse. I am not a DR. but I'm sorry I don't agree with the PTSD theory. You are unfortunately experiencing HPPD. Do you have PTSD aggravated by the events that happened to you I'm sure. But if you are treated as PTSD exclusively this could be bad. Because (once again not a DR) They will put your on SSRI otherwise known as anti depressants and these could aggravate the symtoms, Ive had the white sparks. That is a sign that something definitately went wrong with synapsis in your brain during your drug experience. Read the other forums and become more acclimated in HPPD. I know what your'e going through but there are things you can do to make these things less severe. There is going to be a lot of trial and error and if you with stain from taking ANYTHING for a wile you MIGHT be let out of this nightmare. I'm sorry to be blunt and probably said things you did not want to hear. Like for example- I'm sorry life is going to be different from now but it's not over. FIGHT THIS. But I do hope you know your done with these drugs. Look up the pharma section under BENZOS ARE OKAY AND SOMETIMES NECESSARY - tooch83 I'm sorry this happened but we are here for you.