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  1. Today
  2. its called obsession or OCD
  3. Yesterday
  4. It might not last long then, so just do all the things to stay healthy and avoid stress. I hope you share some good news with us soon
  5. ikr I have been thru shit like that
  6. To piggyback on this subject and what I posted in David's thread, what essentially got absorbed into the culture from the 60s was the idea that drugs were the key to "expanding your mind" when in fact it was Eastern philosophy, Jungian psychology, the foundations laid by the Beat poets and Avant Guard art and of course the war in Vietnam. All of these things collided and though drugs were a part of it they were't the only part and yet past generations have really looked past how holistic the 60s were. Meditation, spirituality, philosophy, enlightenment and seeing the world differently is where so many from that era ended up, with better lives, more happiness, more peace and understanding about the world, and yet popular culture just seems intent on linking the 60s to LSD as if it was the catalyst that revolutionized everything. I apologize for ranting but I've been studying on this era lately and it's just all the more frustrating to be in my position, to know there were all sorts of cases of mental collapse related to LSD and drugs back then and yet everyone just overlooked it and wrote it off and never seemed willing to admit that these drugs weren't all that safe. Did they expand people's minds? I know many people have felt that way, but they also ruined people's lives and nobody wanted to admit that fact. Long story short: If you truly want enlightenment you must obtain it through sobriety, through healthy living, through vulnerability, through volunteer work, through friendship, family, understanding history and artistic expression and everything else that makes being a human worthwhile. Hijacking your brain with chemicals for a few hours of increased dopamine isn't going to expand your mind. It might make you feel good, then again it also might get you HPPD. But living a sober, healthy lifestyle brings nothing but positives and can open you up to becoming an authentic, joyous human being in ways you never thought possible.
  7. Last week
  8. Sobriety has treated me well. There was a time where I felt life without drugs would be dull and unexciting. I've found the opposite to be true. I'm not a religious sort, but every sober day feels like a miracle. Sounds stupid, but that's how it registers in my coconut.
  9. Yeah, I sort of want to blame the fact that the chem was a designer drug, but i got my first symptoms years back from MDMA, a fairly well understood chemical. I've had RCs that never exacerbated my symptoms. They might have contributed to a later condition, but speculating is a waste of time. I'll never touch another again. I don't even take prescription meds anymore. Those aren't really any safer when you have HPPD. And I'm talking in terms of the odds of worsening symptoms, or adding side effects or dependency issues, but that's every man and woman's decision to make with a med professional. I will say, HPPD becoming more common might be a good thing. More visibility might mean more media attention and research, and maybe better treatments. My two pennies. This is sort of my philosophy. Drugs got me in this mess. Time to live clean.
  10. On last saturday 18 h goes trip,8 hours was most intensively, when took felt lost in my self and anxiety. Friend took and everything was good to him. So i don't know.
  11. Give yourself some time. A couple of months isn't much. Staying clean is the single best thing you can do for yourself. Keep up the jogging, exercise is good too! Try not to be pessimistic. Chances are your symptoms will improve as long as you stay clean. A positive attitude goes a long way. KB, I agree. The chemicals available now are scary. They have no track record and they're constantly tweaking these molecules so they're "legal". People, be careful!
  12. David, excellent post! In my experience hppd is quite uncommon. I'm still in touch with the people I dosed with decades ago. I was the only one who ended up with this condition. Granted, that's a small sample size of about a dozen people. That being said none of them had even heard of anyone with long term post-dose symptoms. Understand that we indulged nearly continually for quite a few years. This is just about the only place I post. The internet is a place I find unnerving and prefer to keep a low profile. My point? I don't know really. Your post just got me thinking. K.B. I hear what you're saying about the 60s generating acting like drug use was a badge of honor. In the late 60s I was a pre-teen who was fascinated by these stories. I couldn't wait to give it a try. My drug use was at best misguided and at worst, self destructive. Raising kids is hard but as parents we need to set a healthy example. I was very blunt with my kids when it came to drugs. I realized the mandatory DARE program in the US was telling them half truths and they knew it. Because of that a lot of kids thought the dangers were lies fashioned as a means of control. That being said, I didn't open up about my use until they were out of college. Again, I don't have a point really. Just thoughts tumbling in the brain.
  13. I'm honestly convinced the Baby Boomer generation is the source of so many problems today. They were a huge reason for why Trump got elected. They harbor most of the racist beliefs in the U.S. They're materialistic. They aren't all that keen on science. And as you've alluded to, they don't seem particularly interested in admitting anything that came from the 60s was damaging when in fact that whole era ripped the U.S. apart. My dad is a perfect example. All he did was brag about how much drugs he did when he was young. I looked up to him so of course I tried to do the same. Look where I ended up. Also, as you've stated, there's such a strong inclination to disbelieve HPPD because by doing so they'd have to admit LSD isn't the miracle drug they all thought it was. My only questions is where neurology comes into all this. HPPD is so clearly a brain malfunction and needs study in that regard. I don't at all see HPPD as an emotional disorder with neurological side effects but rather quite the opposite. It's the visual distortions that precipitate the emotional struggles. It's so obvious based on the decades of this disorder existing and on my own experience that the standard mental health practitioner has absolutely no clue what this is or how to deal with it. I really feel like this is something that needs the attention of neurologists given our symptoms align so much more with those that brain specialists spend a lifetime analyzing.
  14. I don't consider myself old (I'm 29), but I honestly can't believe all the drugs kids are doing these days. They're all manufactured and have names that sounds like Star Wars robots. These just don't sound safe on a surface level. Who's making them? What's in them? Is there any organic compounds or is it all just chemicals mixed together? I never knew HPPD existed prior to getting it but if someone had approached me about trying some of these new-age designer drugs I would have suspected they weren't safe to begin with. I'm not at all trying to say this is your fault, so please don't take it that way. I feel bad for you just like I do anyone that gets HPPD. I just don't get why people are putting all these mystery drugs into their bodies these days. When I was growing up, which really wasn't that long ago, it was just weed, shrooms, acid and occasionally a painkiller or some cocaine here or there and that was it. I really worry about HPPD growing exponentially with all these new drugs out there...
  15. until
    Description of the event
  16. I forgot. Those images are not very clear, but anyone can look up hppdonline.com at the Internet Way Back machine, and see how much this community has done. There is some very useful information contained in this archive, which would take forever to download unless someone who is very savvy could obtain the files they have in their archive. I have begged people to follow my youtube channel, and I realized I wrote about this in the message above, but YouTube is ADHD crack, and I forgot to include the link. AND CLICK SUBCRIBE. Click Watch on the boring watch video. 10,000 Views is an important Metric. I will put up more videos, but these 2 are classic: CLICK ME TO SEE DR. ABRAHAM VIDEOS: https://www.youtube.com/DavidKozinVerified
  17. I am making some cosmetic, functional and other changes to the website to test features and see if it will handle some future plans. I have had some very challenging years, but now I have the plans to implement and I am fearless. Also, I get really pissed off when the HPPD story is told incorrectly on large government-funded websites, drug treatment centers and places I would never have thought HPPD would even appear. Even to the relatively educated Psychadelic class, the idea that LSD could cause HPPD was at best an overstated condition, and at worst (most common) it was considered to be a myth. I must admit that the "Millenials" have really tried to reduce the stigma associated with the disorder just by joining Facebook groups for HPPD. Some of you have created videos, music, blogs and for me to see HPPD listed in online pamphlets for drug-addict treatment centers is AMAZING and SCARY. It is amazing that the information I have noticed is stating that HPPD of the Consistent Visual Type is real. Previously, flashbacks were recognized, but not the long lasting visual disturbances. That is Amazing. We owe it to you, the members before you and to the majority of the researchers who haven't slanted their datasets. This is Scary. I would rather have no study that a bad study. If a case report is published where a person is diagnosed with HPPD based on two criteria (1. Patient states they are experiencing hallucinations & 2. The patient stated the hallucinations began with the drug). The individual is treated with Risperdal (risperidone), which is recognized in multiple reports in the Archives of General Psychiatry and other literature (and many of our/my personal experience) to exacerbate HPPD. Consequently, there is a study that states a person with HPPD was cured with a drug normally contraindicated for the treatment of HPPD. The error is the diagnosis. If this was a freshman in college with a family history of schiophrenia, and who had early signs of a disorder belonging to psychosis, it should have been identified as Hallucinogen-induced Psychosis and part of the HPPD syndrome is that drugs like Risperdal make it worse. So, I have three studies. I am applying to a clinical mental health program and seeking an advanced graduate certification that would enable me to open up a clinic, practice counseling with a legal clinical license and this is my life plan. I would like to get hired at the Lab of the school I am applying to, and do so with my own research funding. (I know, I have promised a lot of things lately, but it seems there is always a crisis, but if I can eat and spend 4 hours a day to this project we will have these studies completed before I am finished.) Additionally, the degree will allow me to legally diagnose individuals that have HPPD with the formal diagnosis of HPPD. I would be a dedicated clinician to HPPD and related disorders, and if that doesn't use up enough time then I will work with individuals with opiate and benzodiazepine addiction. Creating a humane Withdrawal Protocol for Benzodiazepines in America would be one of the most significant contributions to addiction medicine since the biological model. I asked people to sign up to my YouTube channel, and I am at 25. However, I had nothing of value posted on my channel yet. Now, it has changed. Two sections of an interview with Dr. Henry David Abraham, where I asked questions and Dr. A answer about two very important sections on HPPD. I found them after many years, and they are from 2001. My youtube page is: Here are some images of HPPDonline.com and NODID through the years.
  18. Hi all, long time reader, first time poster. I got a mild case of HPPD from a six month weed bender. There were like five MDMA rolls and three mushroom trips also. I realized i didn't feel myself and stopped smoking weed, using mushroom and MDMA. This happened about four years ago. My symptoms at their worst during that time was mild VS, mild after images(barely noticeable, but they existed), depersonalization and brain fog. So, up until recently, the DR, DP and brainfog have really lifted. I barely have any problem with them. I had used some drugs sparingly on the weekends. Stuff like 3-fpm, Hexen, and some others. I'm not proud of this, but my visual symptoms didn't change from what I could discern, so i thought, why not? One day, I tried a compound I've never had before called 4-mpd. I snroted 30 mgs and went for a jog. When I got back in the house, I realized something was off. My visual snow was a couple levels stronger now. It now climbed freely on the walls with the lights on, and before it didn't. Everything was giving me an after image also. Any light, no matter how dim, caused an after image that would flash for a second of two before fading. I also have illusory palinopsia now; waving my hand causes it to blur across my field of view. It's been a few months since things have gotten this way and nothing has improved. I wanted to hear any thoughts on this situation. I quit all drugs and I mean ALL. I run daily and eat reasonably well. I'm just shocked that my visual stuff got so much worse when it seemed like nothing could make it change before. I'm guessing this will probably never get any better. Wanted to share this experience as sort of a warning. Leave the drugs alone. Ask me any questions, no matter how old the post is, I'll keep up as much as I can.
  19. hey I decided I finally would upload a video about hppd gonna upload on youtube WIN_20171117_060240.MP4
  20. i do acid every day lol
  21. Take time to recover. Avoid stress, avoid alcohol, avoid caffeine. When did you take the lsd?
  22. For many people... yes. It reduces visuals about 50% for me.
  23. I'm felling so fucked up, felling depressed, anxiety, bad mood, panic attacks,depersonalation, hallucions, I felt thirst symptoms one day after lsd taking, now it's hard to focuse on everything: school, family.... Which offers you could give me? healthy lifestyle,meditation, yoga very hard to focus on them in the beggining. Any suggestions how to reduce these things?
  24. who can help to reduce hallucination?
  25. I use Lorazepam and Clonazepam, but I don't take it every day... All of these meds are highly addictive and will cause major problems in a few years, if taken every day. This is how I avoid addiction/tolerance: Lorazepam (2.5mg) - Thursday 6pm Clonazepam (1mg) - Friday 9am Clonazepam (1mg) - Saturday 9am Lorazepam (2.5mg) - Sunday 9am Every 2-3 months, I have 2 weeks completely free of meds to make sure I am not seeing any signs of addiction. This has worked for 10 years or so and brings me relief for nearly 4 days per week.
  26. How you felling now ?and which treatment you chosen?
  27. I think to try bromazepan
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